one of the last things my mother told me on her deathbed was:

“make sure you and your sister don’t get separated.
i want you both together.”

…and i tried.
if it wasn’t jackals circling her money,
it was relatives coddling her because she was “light skin”.

Foxhole,
it was a challenge.

i often wonder what our lives would have been like if we moved to florida?
we were supposed to go live with our uncle,
but tbh,
his life crashed and burned a few years later.
as my sister got older,
her mental health got worse and worse.
unfortunately,
we don’t have the kind of relationship my mother wanted for us.
she hits me up ever so often with “i’m gonna do better” DMS.
i don’t answer because she isn’t gonna do better.

i’ve been seeing a lot of discourse online about rue,
who is played by zendaya on “euphoria“.

people saying lexi was mean.
people saying her mother should have tried harder.
people saying they wanted a happier ending for rue.

mmm.

until you’ve loved someone struggling with addiction,
or severe mental health issues…

“euphoria” ended how it was supposed to end.
i don’t like how the final third season went at times,
because it almost felt like a completely different show.
nate jacobs in his humiliation ritual arc being the main one.

it felt like the creator of “euphoria”,
sam levinson,
cut nate’s balls off,
made him wear the dog outfit cassie had on,
and had him be his little bitch until he was euthanized.
along with that story line,
labrinth being cut from music (because he created a whole mood),
and jules being pretty useless,
i think the ending was pretty solid.
spoilers included…

one thing that gets my Foxhole open is a stacked wolf like ^above.
marshun “bend me over the sink” cooper is the “stacked wolf” in this fontversation.
marshun has been a Foxhole Fav since his debut on marvin bienaime.
we lusted him so much,
The Foxhole was the first to drop that pipe leakage.
( x go back to 2017 )
my F-BI can be so…
inquisitive.

anyhoo,
marshun has done nude modeling for marvin since then.
in my fantasies,
i’ve always wondered:

“does marshun know how to use that beautiful pipe of his?”

well,
the inquisitive F-BI dropped a “cheer me up” goodie basket.
it was filled with an alleged stroke resume for review…

*This content is intended for audiences 18+. By accessing this page, you acknowledge that you are of legal age and agree to view adult or mature-themed material. All stories, images, and commentary are fictionalized or speculative unless otherwise stated.

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would never have went to that bitch’s wedding.

…not after she played in my face after fucking my ex.
damn sure wouldn’t be helping improve her life either.

although she is vibe,
on season 3; episode 7 of “rain or shine” on “euphoria”,
maddy’s recent downfall was being too kind.

i felt that in my entire spirit.
by answering cassie’s DM to reconnect,
and going back to something that God removed her from,
maddy ended up losing A LOT.
i was expecting a whole revenge plot from maddy this season tbh.
she fell for the okey doke and cassie reminded her that she was still beneath her.

sometimes,
we need to tell that spirit of forgiveness and re-connection to…

i always tell people that when a loved one dies,
your spirit will always remind you.
there are some years you may forget but on birthdays,
or death anniversaries,
you’ll suddenly remember out of nowhere.

“ooooh,
this is why i’ve been feeling so moody.
it’s “such and such” death anniversary…”

some years,
you’ll keep it moving because you are in a good headspace.
when you are going through a lot,
the sadness feels heavier even though it’s years or decades.

love never dies even if their physical isn’t there anymore.

as you know,
i’m dealing with a lot in this new chapter.
i’m grateful for everyone who reaches out to uplift and check in.
every year,
like clockwork around memorial day…

last night,
during the intro of “euphoria”,
something happened where i went:

“mmm.
this is too good to be true.”

it was about one of characters as a kid,
their mama met a potential step daddy,
and he was buying expensive shit to make her happy.
i was judging him,
waiting for the other shoe to drop,
when my friend said…