there are folks who come out of the closet and i’m like:
“Uh,
who?”
…and i mean that #respectfully.
comedian,
jerrod carmichael,
reportedly came out of the closet the other day per variety’s ig…
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so he caught his father cheating and he equated that with his own secret?
did his catch his father cheating with another male?
i’m confused with his reasoning for coming out.
i’m glad he is able to come out and comfortably live his truth tho.
i’m sure some folks will be cheering him on…
I don’t believe guys who date only interracially or guys who profess their love for Black men.
Interracial daters are the main ones saying “Why do you have to make everything about race and sexuality? Why can’t you “happen to be Black” or “just someone who happens to be gay?”
So why are videos titled “Me and my FIRST WHITE BOYFRIEND”. Why aren’t the captions on instagrams “#gaycouple #gaylove? Because you want to highlight being with someone not Black.
And the Black guys who claim to date only Black, y’all are full of it because the white guys you “admit are attractive”…aren’t. And why are your likes full of non-Black men?
Nobody’s telling the truth.
Dating interracially because “Black men did you wrong” isn’t an excuse. Shouldn’t love be “deeper than skin”? You didn’t find a white guy organically. He didn’t “happen” to run into you at the grocery store checkout. You specifically set your filters to “white” on apps or dismissed anyone who wasn’t that messaged you. That’s not fate or divine intervention. You purpose sought out white men, so stop acting like “we make everything about race” when you do too.
And the “I only date Black”, why have so many Black men not ever been on dates? Why haven’t you asked a Black man out? Or is asking for nudes in your first message a way to rule out the “prudes”?
Gay dating is a mess no matter who it is, so just stop.
Interracial daters will have ridiculously high standards for other Black men, but lower them for anyone not Black because “they see potential”.
Unless your non-Black guy has been through more than one year of therapy, has good credit, would be picked at a sperm bank and is physically fit, don’t talk to me about how “Black men cannot have well-adjusted relationships”.
You make excuses for your non-Black dates, but hold Black men to the fire and I’m sick of it.
If you’re going to talk about how great dating non-Black is, at least date some attractive. You always seem to be with the rejects that white gays don’t even want. I have seen VERY FEW interracial couples where the Black guy wasn’t significantly hotter than the nonBlack guy.
And miss me with the “it’s not about looks”. You are a man. A visual creature. If your 1/10 nonBlack boyfriend wouldn’t get picked without nudes, what makes him such a prize?
I need you to be with the best of the best when you’re going to compare white men to Black men.
And it’s so crazy how it’s always as pale or Eurocentric as possible. I rarely see dark-skinned Indian and Black dating. It’s almost as if, if they’re not Asian, Latino or white, they don’t exist. But it’s not about race….right?
I meant to say “North Asian”. Clearly Indian men are Asian, but are South Asian and don’t fit Eurocentric beauty standards as often as those in the North.
I understand the disappointment of seeing a black celebrity, especially a black gay celebrity, whose partner is white. But what if—even after primarily pursuing men of your own race to date and be in a relationship with are rejected for those who are white—you decided to date outside your race? And find success in doing so? Because I’m speaking from experience and it happens. It may not be what your ideal is, but it happens.
Hell as controversial as it is. I’m proud of him for finding love and realizing that if you want love without baggage and drama that you may have to look outside your own race. How many black gays do you know struggle with so many things and are less than nice? How many black gays you know are catty or lean into the whole Bad Boys LA Gay aesthetic? Who honestly wants to put up with that? White gays seem to just live there lives as men who are gay. I think that’s the difference of why rich black gays look outside their race which is very similar to rich black men dating white women. Nobody wants to deal with a ghetto or slave mentality or hood/ratchet behavior all the time. I see black people wanting to build dynasties and empires and figuring out who is on the same page as them. Not to discredit my people because they are some good bougie hardworking gay black men and black women who can fit the bill but they are harder and harder to find. I say find love and someone on your level or better no matter what package they come in.
Because every black person from the hood is trash and every rick black person is just wonderful . YEAH THE FUCK RIGHT! Y’all be telling on yourselves with these posts. As if every rich black person is the end all be all and people should just throw themselves at their feet. Just cause someone has money does not mean they are a quality partner.
Me & and my ex are both black and from the hood and knew how to save our money which in turn pushed up a class. Mean while my friend who dated a rich black man ended up having to get a restraining order against him because that ninja was crazy and was parked outside his house & job after they had broken up.
People are a lot more complex than what you describe. I guess I should take your name at face value.
Clearly you are being hella defensive in your response and delusional in your thinking. Nowhere did I say being rich gave you the entitlement to not have your own issues. What I actually said why can’t he date outside his race if he can’t find whatever he is looking for within it? If you and your ex was so great then why is he your EX?!? You told on yourself with that one because y’all supposedly had all that going on and still got NOWHERE. Which is why your alone, lonely, upset and projecting onto me with the same garbage rhetoric that plagues anybody that thinks outside of the box.
He found love in a hopeless place because he took a risk that is frowned upon by crabs in a barrel. Black gay men rise up and take agency over your lives, live it to the fullest and out loud. Stop caging yourself within the urban gay culture and stretch yourself to new possibilities and ways of thinking and being. It’s a new day and we aren’t the outcasts we once were. We can mingle with the straights and be ok. We can mingle with the whites and be ok. Let’s have our own table but also know that we can also sit at any other table we want because we can. Take back your power and pride and just be you.
My problem was you acting like he or any other negro who dates out is only doing so because they’re high value individuals that can’t find someone the same color as them on their level. Like I said YEAH THE FUCK RIGHT! You don’t know how him or any of these negros are behind closed doors. The Black people they did date probably didn’t wanna pursue anything further with them. You don’t know. There are plenty of mentally & financially stable black people, so if they couldn’t find one, they didn’t look hard enough. The truth of the matter is they didn’t want one. They should just admit that because this “there are no black men/women on my level” is bordering on racist.
About me & my ex… What we had going we still have going on. Are jobs, money, & work ethic didn’t disappear just cuz we’re no longer together. We broke up and went on to find other hardworking Black men to be with. Where did I indicate I was lonely? That’s some true projecting. Yo lonely ass holding out hope some white man will save you. lol
That last paragraph was fucking CORNY! Black people gay & str8 been mingling & sitting at all kinds of tables. That just reminded me that you’re young. I have no idea why I’m arguing with a child. I can tell what kind of person you are just by the words you use. Talk about a tired rhetoric.
If you supposedly are such a loving and great relationship then why not state that first instead of referring to some old ass ex that probably left you because you ASSume shit and want to be a keyboard warrior instead of asking for clarification and being open to other logic outside of the bullshit that perpetuates in your head. But go off sis on a username that you clearly don’t have a fucking clue what it means or represents. But go off sis on trying to lecture me about a supposed white savior that I’m allegedly holding out for instead of understanding there other nuances and reasons why someone would DARE to date outside their race knowing clowns like you can’t wait to attack them and label them all kinds of shit just to soothe your own troubled soul.
The only thing you said of merit is that YOU DON’T KNOW. And that’s the underlying fact of the matter, none of us knows so instead of coming at him about a decision he made about his life that has shit to do with you and your lack of a life… how about we ask or try to show another black gay man some grace, understanding and compassion instead of doing the exact same shit he’s already getting from everybody else? Just a thought, I know you seem to be allergic to those.
How about you show the entire black race some grace, understanding, and compassion instead of doing the same exact shit we’re always getting from everybody else i.e painting us all under one brush.
“White gays seem to just live there lives as men who are gay.”
An honest question: And why do you think that is…? Could it be that white men can live their lives in a more open and freer way because they aren’t burdened by the intersection of race and sexuality like black (and other non-white) gay men?
I’d argue that black gay men can’t exist as “men who are gay” like white men because we live in a world where our sexuality (and biological sex) is racialized. And, if we are being honest, it was white men (some of whom were gay) that created that context: a racialized sexuality.
I understand and to a degree, agree with what you said. I’m not trying to have a theoretical conversation on this. I just wanted to give another perspective outside of the same ol shit that is spewed out with no thought as to what if. Yes we have been pigeonholed by a lot of things. I just need us to get to a place where we can love, validate and accept ourselves on our terms and live our lives as we see fit. I think black gay men can live their lives as simply men who are gay once they get to that place.
Jerrod Carmichael and Raven Symone seem like quirky black people and more than likely got shunned by black people when they were looking to be loved and accepted. It’s not surprising to me that they would find what they needed in a white person, go where you are celebrated and not tolerated.
Like we haven’t heard the “I’m quirky and no other black person wants me because of it” bullshit before. This ain’t even your first time posting that on here.
I’m a quirky black person who has been loved and accepted by black men from many different classes. Rich, poor & in between. Stop trying to make Black people the problem.
He’s always seemed a bit tormented to me, even when he was on The Carmichael Show, where he played a straight man, so I wasn’t surprised when he announced that he “hooked up with some men” as part of his 2019 special. JamariFox, you did write about it back then. The other big thing he announced was that he dated White women. That wasn’t a surprise at all.
He’s now fully coming out as a “gay” man, as opposed to being bi, and the new special is worth watching because it shows how difficult this step was and is for him, especially in his early 30s vs. being a 20-something or a teen, and how his mother’s failure to fully accept and love him is a huge part of that struggle. His homophobic male relatives also are an issue, though it sounds like his father and brother do accept him.
He also shared that he has a White boyfriend, and that Black women in general have been super-supportive of him, but feel hurt by that. Again, I wasn’t surprised he ended up with a White man, though he did make a joke about “sucking a Dominican’s d!ck.” I’d say watch the special if you can; it isn’t long, and some of what he says echoes the great points you and others make on here.
^ thanks for this breakdown 🙏🏾
I really enjoyed his HBO special it was funny yet sad at times.Some of his family members are more supportive than others.When he talked about his strained relationship with his religious mother it was heartbreaking .It was funny when he talked about his straight male friends reactions to him coming out.And it was funny when he talked about his black female friends reacting to him dating a white guy.
I really liked the special.It was a racially mixed crowd and they were so supportive and thoughtful with the questions they shouted out.Almost all the people shouting out questions were Black.
I’m probably biased because I was already a big fan of his from watching The Carmichael Show.BTW tonight he will be hosting Saturday Night Live.
At one point he said he felt free and that’s awesome.Everyone should feel free to be their authentic self.
He had a sitcom a few years ago The Carmichael Show woith David AlanGriet and Loretta Devine The show also had Tiffany Haddish and Lil Rel Howery whose careers were just starting Show had 3 short run seasons first season 6 episodes and the other two 13 each 2015 – 2017
He has some type of special just released and is hosting SNL So you know he got pull I detected a sort if bougie disposition from him and wouldnt be surprised if he was in an interracial relationship
We need to face a startling truth as Maya Angelou says. In certain areas of the world, in this country particularly, the new millennium children have not been conditioned and programmed to find love in one ethnicity only. I distinctly recall how attractive a few if the white guy’s were back then in my high school.
My first real love relationships was with a East Indian and a Nicaraguan.
Growing up and accepting who others choose to love 💕 is a hallmark of maturity.
This missive is for me and my shadiness to gay black men who love their white husbands, boyfriends, lovers. We all have inner reasons for choices that we are not compelled to have to share with anybody else.
I don’t see a problem with being attracted to other people but the issue is while we being the rainbow coalition bc “love is love “ they dating us for dick and fantasy and ditching us especially the straights. And I used to like an East Indian too and he loved hip hop. But far as marriage? They sticking to their own. And the issue is we as Black people don’t have the loyalty other races have to continue the lineage
There’s a tiktok of a lightskin man upset that his white girlfriend had a baby that looked white he wanted his child to look biracial
I’m starting to think life is all a fantasy
That light-skinned man sounds like so many people (black and non-black alike) that have mixed-race children. They get upset when the baby doesn’t come out looking “exotic” with “good hair,” tan skin, and green or hazel eyes (with freckles). God forbid the child (especially the girl) come out the womb with 4C hair and obviously black features. These people want a custom-made product, not a human being. It’s fucking gross…
My
Aunt’s are sorority women. They have a Delta Cotillion as do the AKA’S. The Black Gay Establishment should pursue that model so that once a year the gay males could come out; be presented to society in ball gowns or Tuxes. So and so coming out is so redundant and overplayed and late. Just be quiet and live and shut up.
^that idea would be so dope.
coming out isn’t ground breaking anymore unless it’s some a+ celeb that people want to fuck 🤣😂
Then just like every other famous black gay man, he went and got himself a pale person to call his boyfriend.
Yawn! We already knew…at least those that knew of him. Ion even think Lil Nas X was gay…just a nerd…but then he “blossumed” I guess…that was a yawn too. Why do they try to make the obvious such breaking news??
^ a ground breaking coming out is a king james type of male.
hell,
odell might even shake the table a little.
it’s a good show. yes he disclosed his partner is white
I’m going to have to watch. I have seen another special he did and it was pretty good.
You know you can’t be black, make entertainment/sports money, AND date another black person. You only black on black date if you make less than six figures.
Lol J u did a whole write up about him in 2019 when he said he has been with a man before. So u do know who he is….right?
^ damn i did write about him.
good call.
he isn’t someone i check for so i def forgot about him.
so judging from that entry: http://insidejamarifox.com/jerrod-carmichael-might-be-maybe-gay/
he has admitted to dealing with males before.
why is his “coming out” news then?
Congrats to him for living his truth. That’s what’s up