black folks need to stop trying to be included in white shit (heavy on the pick me energy)

friends.
a white ass show,
with white ass people,
doing white ass shit.
a show i actually enjoyed tbh because it was funny to me.
the word “friends” always triggers black folks and i don’t know why.
black twitter was filled with venom towards the friends reunion on hbo max.

“They was never any black friends!”
“They copied Living Single with the concept!”
“I never watched an episode and I know I’ll hate it.”

what?
what?
and what?
a foxholer sent me this picture and the main conversation was…

“There is no diversity in this picture.”

it all made me wonder:

Why do black folks always need or want to be included in white ass shit?

i tuned in to living single like i did friends.
two different shows; two different concepts.
folks LOVE barking about living single compared to friends,
but failed to mention how they allegedly fired kyle barker for standing up for better pay.
( x see that here )
the storyline went to shits once he left that show.

All those folks on Friends demanded a milli an episode.
They all stood together and got that pay.
They went on to filming ten whole seasons of that show.

toni childs is another who stood up for equal pay on “girlfriends“,
but allegedly,
the other girls went rogue to stand with her so she dipped.
isn’t girlfriends alleged sex in the city inspiration?
like insecure is an hbo girls/sex in the city inspiration too?
ijs…
martin
fucked up with gina and that storyline went to the depths of hell.
billy cosby fucked up his legacy with “the cosby show“.

White folks weren’t complaining when The Fresh Prince had their reunion special on HBO Max.

…but we been dragging will smith for that whole “first aunt viv” debacle for years.

I didn’t want to see black people on Friends because they’d probably be whitewashed.
I don’t need to see black gays in that pic with the white gays because they’d be whitewashed.

it’ll be a lot of “bro” this and “cowabunga” that.
when they added a “black” friend on friends,
it was aisha tyler and she dated joey.
i still cringe when they added jennifer hudson on sex in the city:

i drag her every chance i get when i see her reacting to that ugly ass bag.

 black folks have our own spaces and entertainment to nurture.
spike lee
john singelton (rip)
tyler perry

issa rae
lena waithe
jordan peele
ryan coogler
ava duvernay

mara akil brock
barry jenkins
james bland
justin simien
carlton jordan
jamari fox (#futuregoals)
oprah/own network
…and so on and so forth.
so many web series and up-and-coming talent on youtube alone.

we have/had a number of shows that we need to support.
some of us are so busy trying to police white folks and their shit,
but will still refuse to support their own because there is always some issue with our own shit.
we always end up in some behind-the-scenes drama that ends our shit.

Yes,
black gays,

we are included in that cluster fuck too.

again: we could have nice things,
but we choose not to keep them.
let friends have their moment because they deserve it and those white gays be a broadway production together.
so in a nutshell:

Mind your business because we have our own shit to deal with.

lowkey: another thing is the “oh i don’t watch white shows” black posse,
but will watch marvel productions,
anime + manga,

the office,
golden girls,
parks and rec,
the hills,
the kardashians,
how i met your mother,
real housewives of some white rich nonsense,

and the nanny.
like,
st-whole-fu.
white folks are entertaining and i can watch their foolishness.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

36 thoughts on “black folks need to stop trying to be included in white shit (heavy on the pick me energy)

  1. One hundred percent brother. Look I have always said why are we black folks, upset with White folks promoting and doing their shit and we want to be included ? NO ITS THEIR MONEY- thry can do what the fuck they want with it so stop trying to be validated by white folks…SMFH…we are so traumatized its killing us….Memo ro black folks- DO YOUR OWN SHIT …get your coins and do your own shit and stop complaining when white folks do their shit

    1. ^it gives heavy slave in the field entry to me.
      black folks are still suffering from post-traumatic slave syndrome and we need to work on that.

      friends worked hard and got their flowers.
      they were on for ten years and have a strong fan base.
      they are allowed to have their moment.

    1. ^and there are plenty of black folks who stole from other black folks.
      stole ideas,
      concepts,
      and plans and used for themselves.
      all while ruining that other black person from progressing and leaving them in ruin.
      we have black record producers that have alleged stolen from their black artists,
      but we have promoted the thief and made them rich(er).

      i feel like stealing is a people thing.
      all races have stolen from one another or other races for success.

      again: we need to worry about our own shit.
      its a fact that black folks do everything better than others.
      how can we make sure our shit is secure instead of always letting others in.
      we love inviting other races to the cookout and get mad when they betray us.
      see: justin timberlake.

      1. Eminem is another one ☝🏾 he literally has a song that leaked before he was famous where he went on a racist rant about black women, because a black girl he was dating broke up with his shrimp dick ass. Yet he’s still given his flowers by the black community. Idc how long ago that was or what shitty apology his publicist made him conjure up. You wanna talk about canceled, he should’ve been a open and shut case fuck him too.

        1. ^exactly and he has a lifetime entry to the cookout.

          its contradictions like this that drive me crazy with our community.
          it’s this “okay for one but not okay for others” mentality that bugs me.
          i love us but we are due for a dragging,
          especially how we treat other black folks. .

          like,
          what????

          ariana grande is a white woman cosplaying and that is okay because she says “yuh” and sings over black beats.
          okay.

          1. can i just say i LOVED when miley cyrus embarrassed the folks who let her get an invite to the cookout?

            that was one of my favorite moments tbh.

        2. The old folks used to say “Grow your own.” Don’t worry about the Friends reunion. Believe it or not, Friends was one of my favorite shows. There is too much creativity in our community to worry about representation.

  2. White people have excluded us from the beginning of time. At this point it shouldn’t be shocking, but I get the frustration. Some blacks subconsciously put whites on a pedestal by making comments like this, or the infamous “this is why white people don’t like us” as if they’re the creme de la creme of the human race, when in fact a lot of them are actually the most rudest and ratchet people in the world.

    It’s whites like those especially gay whites (in the picture above) that are selectively racist. You have to be a certain black to sit at the table. Whether you’re, rich, famous, popular, very attractive, educated, or biracial. Those are the ONLY acceptable blacks that can get an invitation to sit at the table with potatoe salad with raisins. Selective racism is actually more prominent than blatant racism in my opinion. We don’t talk about that enough.

    Not too sound abrasive but I’ve never met a white person that I felt immediately connected too or had the desire to get to know anyway. So this exclusion whether intentional or not bothers me not one bit.

    1. ^taye diggs is the “go to” black person they feel comfortable with.
      gabby union was one in the 90s.

      i never felt like i needed to be included with white people.
      i always felt i needed to be included with black folks.
      i come from barbados where i grew up around a majority of black people.
      white people were on tv and there were two in my primary school.
      my views might be skewed because of that.

  3. besides stealing this country,
    our rights,
    and music,
    when it comes to tv,
    what else have they stolen?

    the cosbys?
    a different world?
    moesha?
    the parkers?
    family matters?
    martin?
    fresh prince?
    other black show concepts?

    …because we own those shows apologetically.
    they are us and are apart of our legacy.
    they are legit iconic shows within our community.
    i have yet to see a white show with the same concept of the ones i listed.

  4. I have only one thing to say: The creator from “Friends” stated openly in several news articles that he stole the concept for the show from “Livin’ Single.” So that’s not a Hollywood folklore. Yes, I think that we as a people need to recognize our own greatness and leave other settings alone when we are not included.

    1. ^i feel like the storyline of friends and living single were completely different.

      friends: rachel is a privileged karen who leaves her husband at the altar and shows up in the city to live with monica,
      who she went to school with.
      ross,
      her brother,
      has been in love with rachel since high school.
      chandler and joey live next door.
      pheobe lives down the street or something.

      living single: khadijah,
      sinclair,
      and regine live in an apartment in bk.
      sinclair moved from minnesota where she worked as a secretary for khadijah.
      khadijah ran a magazine,
      regine was a stylist,
      and max was a lawyer.
      the first season was about the women dating and living together.
      overton and sinclair started becoming interested in each other.
      kyle and max were filled with sexual tension and they eventually fucked.

      two different shows with a slight similarity.
      not once did i watch friends and think it reminded me of living single tho.
      maybe because one was “realistic black new yawk” and the other was “fantasy white new yawk”.

      1. read sweetbuddahl’s first sentence again. the creator of friends has openly admitted to stealing living singles concept; thats the root of “black twitters” upheaval. so your drawn out diatribe comparing the two is moot. your article screamed ‘pick me’ more than your overwrought examples. you could have easily made your point of black solidarity without dragging 3 decades of black tv while glorifying white tv.

        1. ^ you clearly missed the point,
          missed the part with all the black content creators,
          and highlighting that WE as a people need to nurture our own and stop begging for white validation and approval.

          you chose to see what you wanted.
          most of the times,
          those who don’t care for you tend to that that.
          that’s perfectly fine.

          enjoy your day and thank you for the comment desmond.

          1. Wow that was a lot of assumptions. I can assure you no points were missed, I just chose to address one point in particular. I also think you misdefined black folks demand for inclusion, diversity, and holding those who openly take from our culture feet to the fire (friends creator) as a measure of accountability as some kinda latent slave mentality… thats reductive. You’re asking blk folk to rebuild & recreate industries where we’ve already built/done the work rather than demand accountability from the systems of those industries. And re white group pics; although it may be the mindset of a few, I would think the vast majority of blk folks couldn’t care less & find that super trivial.

      2. Of course they were different Jamari… it was the 90’s. For the most part black and white folks lived differently. Why would he make it exactly like Living Single? He stole the concept and white washed it. The end. Please stop trying to find an excuse because you like that boring white show friends over a black show.

        1. ^ disney,
          i was rocking with your point until that last part.
          out of everyone who comes on here,
          you have always been respectful and kind.
          don’t let a “boring white show” be the cause of strife.

          besides that,
          thank you for leaving your comment to help me understand.
          it was noted.

  5. This argument fails because all those black TV shows that are supposedly “ours” are written by WHITE people hence Kyle being fired from Living Single. The actor was very vocal about how hard it was to get certain story lines in the show because the writers who were WHITE, did not get it.

    Girlfriends was originally going to have a white female in the main cast but she was dropped for a reason I can’t remember. Also on Girlfriends they had to fight to cast two black women in the roles of Maya & Toni because the writers who were WHITE, wanted to cast two biracial women as they felt having two darker skinned females was not appealing.

    All those TV shows used a black face i.e Latifah, Martin to make it seem like black people were in charge but the truth is we never were. Not to mention a WHITE company owned those shows and discarded them for WHITE shows as soon as they felt they no longer needed them, despite the black shows doing good in ratings. Like what happened to The Game on the CW.

    I don’t really get the point in this rant which i swear you’ve done multiple times before all for generic ass Friends. Which I have in fact watched because it’s always on the TV at work.

    As long they keep trying to control the narrative from the shadows as they’ve been doing, we will continue to stay on their necks but go off i guess.

    1. ^so you’re from what you’re saying we own NOTHING and shouldn’t complain because white people are secretly controlling the narrative anyway?

      noted.

      1. No I’m saying we can’t be mad at black people wanting to be included in white people’s shit because white people owned 98% of television networks.The only reason those black shows existed was because a white person greenlit them.

        But now that i’ve sat on it for a minute i agree with you. Negroes and their constant need for white validation is tiring. i didn’t want to admit it but it has been bothering me for a long time. We don’t need to hear about Friends not having any black people in the 2020’s. It’s not even the best white sitcom. Just one of the most successful. I remember when Mad Men was huge, Oprah had the cast on her talk show and she said “where’s the black people?” Oprah, a black BILLIONAIRE of all people said that. As if she couldn’t fund her own version of Mad Men.

        The internet has changed the game as we can now control our own narrative. It’s too bad low budget indie series like About Him turned into flat out porn because it was a step in the right direction.

  6. Living Single is definitely not in any way related to Friends. If anything its more than Golden Girls. Of course Rayjene (the bougie way of saying Regina) was Blanche the hoe. Synclaire was Rose. Khadijah was Dorothy. Max was Sofia. Just like how Steel Magnolias was originally a country white version, they reboot it as a Black Suburban country version. Girlfriends was definitely a copy of Sex and the City written by Frasier, Kelsey Grammar.

    Martin and Tisha repaired their relationship and tried to reboot it but too many conflicts stopped them. We didn’t quit on The Cosby Show, it was taken from us.

  7. As far as this Friends reunion, let them have it. Black people DON’T need to be included into every white thing. Some things are just not for us.

  8. Friends didn’t need to be a part of Black viewers tv lineup but they did have them. We relate to what we relate to. I can relate more to the original Roseanne show because they was poor and living from check to check and didn’t take nothing from anybody but had a lot of family drama. The reboot was all about Roseanne political side and that eventually got her fired from her own show. The rebranding as the Conners, I can watch it but its not the same. Darlene is just replacing Roseanne as the head of the family and they even mentioned that in this past season. It ain’t the same and its like, ok here is my exit as the black man. They completely left out the black family in the reboot.

    Granted there are some funny white writers but just because they are white to us doesn’t mean they haven’t had a black experience. TV is there way of dealing with it in a white way and to us it looks watered down but that’s what they do.

  9. I for one, would like to see more regular black names instead of white universal names. Bring more Brandon’s, Damien’s, Khalil, Jefferson, Shauna, Shauntay into the mix.

  10. I like Tyler Perry but that show Brothers, gotta go. All of their names are white and they don’t act like brothas and I don’t mean because they not in the hood. Their personalities are more white. Like the mama is funnier than the whole cast. You writing a good show called Sistas but you dropping the ball on Brothas.

  11. Its black shows out we just don’t support them but wanna call out other shows. The Game is trying to make another run to come back but on CBS I think. New writers but might be a whole new cast except Tasha and Malik. If Malik is traded it would make sense. The Sunbeams are done.

  12. Friends came out it 1994…do these “opinionated, woke, early 20s” folk not understand that it was different a time? we didn’t have Twitter & Instagram to be able to voice our opinions & fight for inclusion, THE WORLD WAS DIFFERENT, networks saw what worked, and they formulated shows that bring they believed would bring in revenue, I’m sure if friends came out TODAY yeah they would have a diverse cast, but it didn’t, again it came out in the early damn 90s

    1. And Girls is based on The Adventures of Awkward Black Girl. Not that it’s anything like Girls, just for being on the same network.

  13. I know this isn’t directly related to the topic, but this can also be extended into some black gays carrying this “pick me” attitude over into the OnlyFans/adult film world.

    I’ve seen one of two things:

    A black sex worker (or pornstar) calls out [read: whines] on Twitter about some white sex worker (or pornstar) not making videos or doing scenes with black guys. Max Coon–ugh, I mean Konner….
    Or, black fans of non-black sex worker/pornstar commenting [read: simping] “oh, it sure would be nice if you would top a black guy for once. Oh well…still love you!!!” LMFAO Baby, Diego Grant (@fulltimepapi) and David Christian (@dombeeef) ain’t interest fucking (dark-skinned) black bottoms. Now bending over for BBC??? Well…

    So, I’ma need my black gays to churn up some pride and self-respect and stop seeking non-black (sexual) validation…

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