Sometimes,
I ask myself,
why hasn’t People reached out to me so we can get this “People’s Sexiest” list in order?

i like to think that i have great taste when it comes to the male species.
i’m so good,
i can tell when someone is fine from the back.
it seems people magazine doesn’t have my energy for whatever reason.
not once in life did i ever look at this 2024’s sexiest male alive and thought…

“John Kraninski is so sexy!
I need some of that STAT!”

cute?
maybe.
handsome?
sure.
sexy tho?

why didn’t that lady drop the bag for our shared hubby to be people’s sexiest?

Sidebar: not even gonna hold you,
but if I met a white wolf who looks like him and is perfect for me,
Jamari Fox will be off the market,
barefoot,
with a pregnant surrogate.
IDC.
Judge if you must.

bad enough,
i saw this gentleman in their sexiest list as well:

Selena Gomez’s boyfriend,
Benny Blanco.

um,
who is setting up people magazine for failure bts?
i think the real question is:

Are the pickings this slim in Hollywood atm?

where are the brad pitt,
morris chestnut,
and keanu reeves replacements at?

lowkey: i don’t think we understood how sexy celebrities in the 90s were.