i was fonting with one of my dear best friends today in texts.
she asked me:
that question always made me nervous.
i got caught up in trying to impress her.
i always saw her as having it together but i am always a mess.
so i always wanted to look like i was doing something even if i wasn’t.
i was always full of excuses because i would do that when i was younger.
so my answer to her question…
that felt so freeing.
being honest felt so good tbh.
i have been living my life in survival mode.
i wore a mask to look together because blending in is safer.
It is okay to not be okay.
It is okay to not be together.
It is okay to not have your life together.
It is okay to be a hot mess.
It is okay to not know what or where you are going in life.
It’s okay to be honest about that.
a few months ago,
one of my foxholers and i were having a chat in dms.
we were talking about an attentionisto who was flexin’ on socials.
…and that spoke to me.
Why aren’t we more fuckin’ honest about your lives?
my life is very still.
i’m working on me and steadily getting back on my feet.
i have been depressed and unmotivated for quite some time.
it has been one thing after the next these last 2 years.
things happened that made me go hide under the bed.
i’m finally feeling a sense of happiness and purpose again.
thats the honest truth.
lowkey: how many people have died trying to hide their truth?
let’s not let that be us.