a couple years ago,
there was an article that was written about a powerful white hyena who was moonlighting as a movie mogul.
it spoke about how he would use his power to make actresses do unspeakable things for roles in his movies.
even though one black actress spoke out,
it was the majority of a-list white actresses that helped make his disgusting behavior go viral.
that once powerful hyena was brought down to the pits of hell and the #metoo movement was born.
the end result is he’s powerless,
sitting in a wheelchair at rikers,
while sexual harassment was highlighted in the entertainment industry and corporate.
it’s no secret that black people have a lot to endure a lot within those spaces.
when we finally make it to a company that is “for us; by us”,
you often feel like a refugee coming into a new world.
the first few days or weeks can be absolutely amazing,
but it’s a whole different story once the honeymoon phase is over.
i was engrossed in an article i was reading yesterday by “black female anonymous” on “medium”.
it was a bombshell about what black vixens allegedly go through working at essence magazine…
it saddened me because it mirrored the exact same treatment myself and so many others have dealt/dealing with.
if you ask anyone,
they’ll say working under some black folks can be a horrible experience.
black folks can be just as evil as our oppressors once we get into power.
we forget how we were treated on the come up and duplicate that same behavior with those under us.
i had to wonder…
Why is getting abused by other black people in leadership okay?
why is it okay to breakdown other blacks,
but play this fake game of “for us; by us”?
this might be a controversial statement but…
Many black people tend to live in a state of lack.
we stay thinking:
“Well,
if we get rid of “said black person” or “said black company”,
we won’t have anyone to represent us!”
why would we want legit demons behind closed doors being the faces of our culture?
you don’t know how many times i’ve worked in a corporate office,
with a terror of a black person at the helm,
and the attitude is “this is just the way it is” in full defeat.
realistically,
no one speaks out in fear of being fired or blacklisted.
i can understand that,
because we have to survive,
but isn’t that an abuse of power?
we have to tolerate being treated horribly just so we can acquire a livelihood?
#blm teaches us that our black lives matter,
and it has brought down many racist and toxic white folks,
but what it doesn’t teach us is that all skinfolk ain’t kinfolk.
the thing is…
We can’t stand in solidarity with toxic black folks while creating these changes.
we can’t admire these toxic black folks and spaces speaking about #blm,
but behind closed doors,
they are the leaders in destroying black lives and careers.
we have to create change within our community and culture if we want to see the full benefits.
this includes involving the black lbgt community as well.
one thing i’ve noticed about other races,
especially white folks,
is they’ll protect their own.
they move like an exclusive club almost.
i’ve seen white folks ban together to bring down those who are liabilities.
for them,
it’s all about reputation and stopping bags.
for us,
since we don’t have a ton of ownership,
we don’t speak out in fear of our reputations and if they’ll stop our bags.
it ends up being a lose-lose situation for us so we have no choice than to endure abuse.
since 2020 is all about the exposure:
Any black person(s) or space(s) that is mistreating and abusing other black folks needs to be outta here.
we need to fill those positions with better and stronger black leaders,
who will not only bring that energy to represent us in public,
but will keep that same energy in private.
we still have a lot to learn because we are 400 years behind.
lowkey: all this cattiness and jealousy needs to stop within the culture too.
some black folks think everyone is a threat to them.
newsflash: if you’re secure in your talent/work ethic,
no one can stop your bag.
we move better in numbers and as a unit anyway.
read the full article about essence: medium
My reality right now, I have a Black female manager and she is the worse. She loves to sing and dance for whitey so she has to treat other Black subordinates bad so she can show the white upper management at the company that she can control the Knee-grows. Sadly in my professional life, I have seen too many Black managers who seem to go out of there way to treat other Black people bad and when the whites in upper management get tired of them after they serve their purpose, they toss them out like trash. These Black managers never treat white employees as bad because they know they wont get away with it, white women tears are powerful no matter how inept or incompetent, and usually white men will exit if they have to be in a department with a Black male or female boss. I personally find I do better with an older Black women as my manager as I have a certain level of respect for their age, it is hard to battle someone your mothers age LOL!
Couple of thoughts in no particular order of importance:
When it comes to dynamics of power dynamics in the workplace we have to think in terms of the person rather than race. Some of the best people I’ve worked under have been black women. They were fair and some of them even nurturing when they really didn’t have to be.
I was also aware that those same black women were under enormous amounts of pressure working middle to upper management jobs and often being the only minority on that level.
Different people handle those stressors differently. Just because someone works their way up to a certain status doesn’t mean they have the “interpersonal/soft skills” to always be delicate to your feelings.
We as a black people also need to be understand we can’t always expect anything other the basic respect everyone should have from their superior. I’ve seen some of us think we can get over or think we can skate by because the people we work under look like us and are supposed to “look out”.
^ many of us will have different experiences in corporate settings.
the ny media scene is pretty small and people talk.
essence has had a bad reputation for a pretty long time.
when you read it in print,
it’s really shocking and mirrors the type of abuse that was endured at the black company i worked at.
i will say,
in my experience,
black vixens in leadership were awful.
the ones who were not on senior level were the most helpful and nurturing.
they tried to look out for me the best way they could.
it was black vixens who organized my going away and raised all that money for me.
they still check in and support me even tho i’m not there.
the ones in management that i busted my ass for?
not a single peep and none of them showed up for me at the end.
heard.
in more white spaces,
it was the same deal.
some black vixens started off nasty,
but they became better once they saw how white folks in power can be.
at one of my jobs,
the managers were from barbados and they were the biggest ass lickers ive ever worked for.
the black male in charge damn near climbed 30 flights of stairs,
during a fire alarm while we were all outside with the fire people,
to retrieve his white bosses bag from his office.
my first job was at a pwi and this one black woman was in charge.
she hired me for nights,
but when i transferred to work as her assistant during the day?
ooooooooh buddy.
she had a horrible reputation and spoke down to everyone.
people hated to come and fix issues because they didn’t want to deal with her.
granted,
she was the only black woman and her other counterparts were men,
but she used being an almighty bitch as her weapon.
it wasn’t until she started getting dicked down by an alpha wolf that she became sweet as pie.
the dynamics of her before and after was shocking af.
that is all my experience and others may have a different story.
i’ve witnessed most of these environments nearly drive black folks crazy,
including myself.
its disheartening when you think an all black company would operate differently tho.
My time in the music industry was a eye opener. The two biggest moguls in the biz treated their own like slaves.
It will make u into a “bad boy” for life…(hint hint) 😉
Thank goodness for yoga.
Only one treated me good and he never made it “Hot in Heree”.
I just feel like when certain black people make it and they have the token mentality. They will do everything to keep the next black person down which is sad. I’ve learned that while climbing the corporate ladder that I cannot rely on getting a helping hand from my fellow black man. I’m gonna have to continue to bust my ass and be the hardest worker in the room so that without a shadow of a doubt my greatness will be recognized. We do need to hold each other accountable but I think now is not the time to worry over what separates or divides us but zeroing on this united front so we can make change. Our community has so many things internally we need to work out but it won’t matter if we can’t get our just due collectively. Everybody wants to be heard and seen NOW instead of waiting for the inevitable point when they will be heard and seen. We can’t win the war if we still stuck on petty battles.
It’s not surprising that some black people in power are abusers. People are people no matter what color you are.
Power corrupts when there is no oversight or accountability (think bill Cosby). He was able to get away with so much because no one challenged him. He was too powerful.
To make matters worse black people are often taught there is only room for one of us at the top. Unlike white people, we are conditioned to see each other as competition for the top spot. (Think Naomi Campbell and Tyra banks). This can create a defensive mindset to destroy others for your own survival.
To add insult to injury , black people are often seen as a monolith, where each black person represents all black people. It’s not fair because white people are allowed to be individuals, while black people have to worry about representing our race in a good light (think Obama).Obama had to present a perfect image because he wasnt just a president he was “the” black president and he had represent black people to the entire world.
It’s complex.