scared

Ask Me My Talent

why does going after your dreams feel so…
overwhelming?
it makes you feel kinda insecure?
almost like you want to give up?
like why does that happen?
why is it when we are confronted with what we want,
or something we thought we knew we wanted,
(until we got all the logistics)
that we buckle?
it can feel like throwing it in the air,
running far away,
and never coming back.
our careers look easy in our minds,
but we have no idea the hard work that goes into it.
acting is hard work.
modelling is hard work.
rapping is hard work.
writing is hard work.
fashion is hard work.
blogging is hard work.
college is hard work.
careers are hard work.
everything requires some kind of sacrifice.
so i had to ask…

You thought it was gonna be easy, huh?…
Continue reading “Ask Me My Talent” →

Not Feelin’ The Funk

so i said when i started this site,
i was going to be honest about things i go through.
i would never out anyone i was dating/fuckin’,
but my struggles was up for grabs.
if you gonna love me,
you gotta love ALL OF ME as well.
the good.
the bad.
the ugly.
the funky?
since a majority of men lurk in the foxhole,
there are some things we DON’T talk about that we should.
plus i never know who is suffering in silence,
needs their “a ha” moment,
or should be aware for future sake.
now before i get into this entry,
i need to put up a disclaimer:

i am a very clean person
i am not sexually active at the moment

okay cool.
i am also prepared to be judged,
but it’s whatever.
don’t judge me like things can’t happen to you as well.
so lets get into it…
Continue reading “Not Feelin’ The Funk” →

Fear Had Me Thinking I Had HIV

fear can have you about to lose your mind.
so last night after scandal,
i was talking to my cousin hybrid and he asked:

“so when last you had some dick in you jf?
you still paranoid from the last time…?”

i played it off,
but im still haunted by the last time i had sex.
I’ve been wanting to blog about it for a while,
but i was so embarrassed that i just kept silent.
maybe i felt id be judged,
but i’ve shared every aspect of my life thus far.
the good,
the bad,
and the wtf so…

Why not talk about this?…

Continue reading “Fear Had Me Thinking I Had HIV” →

This Laid Me Out!

when he says “don’t come in my room”,
he means it…

Continue reading “This Laid Me Out!” →

How Can I Tell My Mama I Seen More Penis Than Fruit of the Loom?

“you know our child said he likes the sweet taste of penis?
i slapped him into next week.
he should be be back on thursday.”

we all love our parent’s right?
they raised us to be who we are today.
their teachings and guidance effects how we do things now.
yes there are some who raised themselves.
some who are not as close.
you know i feel you heavy,
but this entry goes out to the foxhole whose parents are in their lives.
who they can call up and say, “mom or dad… guess what?…”
the ones who don’t want to disappoint them.
the ones who are scared of them.
i had to ask…