FOXMAIL

Yoooooo

Whats up Jamari?? As you know I have been a loyal member of the foxhole since the beginning. I check the site daily and you have definitely helped me through some situations. I’m kinda going through a situation with a guy and I just want your insight.

So I met this guy a few weeks ago and immediately felt something that I haven’t felt for anyone before. I really like him and he says he likes me too but doesn’t show that much attention. I have been entertaining other guys and he got mad about it. He basically doesn’t trust me and said we could only be friends. I laid everything out and told him exactly how I felt about him but he didn’t respond. I deleted his # and our text history and was never going to talk to him again.

He hit me up 2 days later and we had a good convo but he is sending mixed signals. Idk if I should pursue him or just move on. He is the perfect guy…100% my type but I don’t wanna look thirsty or like a fool.

What should I do!?

Thanks!

MY ANSWER…

Continue reading “f0xmail: I Want Him, But The Way Those “Mixed Signals” Are Set Up…” →

FOXMAIL

Jamari I totally understand that you are a busy dude and you might not be able to respond or post my fox mail. First, I want to say I think work wolf is bi, I think if you give him enough time he is going to blow your back out. I think you already know what your getting yourself into that is why you have so many emotions about him, and you can’t help your feelings. I’m with you on whatever decision you decide with him, but I say go for it with him just continue to go at his pace, and maybe you should pretend like their is a dude that’s trying to get at you and see his response. So, when I wrote you earlier this year on how to talk to a wolf in the gym, you gave me some really great advice. Well heres the thing there is so much eye candy in the gym I go too, but there is a couple dudes who I really want. So one dude that eye fucked me for nearly a year and a half started speaking to me 3 weeks ago. So last week we had a short conversation and then towards the middle of the convo he says my girl, I was pissed but played it cool. The reason I am writing you is because I like masculine men especially with muscles lol but one thing I am finding out is that the ones I have talked to in the gym are all married or have girlfriends. I am discrete myself so going to a gay club or getting on gay sites is not my thing, so the gym is the only place I can meet men. When these dudes say my wife or my girl it does something to me, because they eye fuck or flirt with me then mention their wife or girl. It sends me to an array of emotions, and I just put them in my acquaintance list, and the result is me being lonely and sexless. There is this other fine dude that is always staring at me but in my head I know he is probably married with kids. So do you think I should pursue these men even if their with somebody, because me having morals and a conscious is not getting me any sex or a warm body to lay next to?

MY ANSWER…

Continue reading “f0xmail: Should I Smash All the Married/Taken Wolves At My Gym? Help!?” →

FOXMAIL

Aye J, I’s in trouble again:

I’M FEELING MY GOTDAMN BOSS.

So, in September of last year, we got a new guy as our manager:

-32 (I’m 25)
-6’2″
-Spaniard/Portuguese
-Husky
-Short haired & scruffy
-Very much rock band member-esque

..basically NOT MY TYPE at all. LMAO. I like flavored men. I see myself with a flavored man. Yeah. Flavored.

He’s gay, but masculine, sweet, corny (in an adorable way) and loves music (as I do). I really didn’t think much of him at the beginning, probably because in the physical sense, I wasn’t drawn to him. But as you know, its quite easy to fall for someone even if they don’t tickle your fancy in the looks department, especially if you’re a hopeless ass romantic like me. And that’s exactly what I’ve foolishly done: Fell for him. DAMMIT! What have I fucking done?! It’s to the point now that I see something in his physical now too… like a tall teddy bear. (Shit, I’m getting all warm and fuzzy as I type this! LORD.) This would be easy if he wasn’t the boss of me, but he is. Interoffice affairs are a no-no… and he’s even expressed how much he dislikes them. (He said he experienced it once.) His actions say so much of the opposite though; flirts like a MOTHERFUCKER, longingly stares at me (I can feel him staring from across the room!), makes sly remarks about how I need a white guy in my life since I’ve never dated one (I respond accordingly… he’s never been with a black guy) and the energy between the both of us is a bit telltale. On the flipside, he’ll say things about how he doesn’t believe in love because he’s scared of falling in love again and shit, but he ain’t foolin’ this nigga. He’s a mushy, romantic dude who’s (basically) damaged goods.

I know I can romanticize things, but am I in this situation? I’m at a loss… I have no clue what I’m supposed to do here. Do I deny this “crush” or fall back a bit and see where this may go? I feel dumb for texting him at times, thinking I’m foolish for believing in this, but I do.

J, what is my next move?

MY ANSWER…
Continue reading “f0xmail: I Want My Boss… and I Don’t Know What To Do. Help!” →

FOXMAIL

hello dear jamari…

you have no idea how I love your post and relate to some of the things you do say, knowing that you are more of a fox,helps me to really follow and see the dynamics in this lifestyle, I’m writing to you because,I don’t know what is going on with me, I started my sexual life 2 years ago as a fox,but it feels like I don’tknow if i enjoy the anal sex or not,I know I’m more of a fox since I seen a porn in my life (straight and gay)I knew I was the bottom,but for some reason I feel like I haven’t had “the”sex yet,the type that will make you go crazy even over the person or only his “third leg”.

is it because I’m a bit cynical in my nature that’s why I can’t let go ?
or its just I met awful tops lol?
or should I go for the 100%  my type physically?
(because i tend to lose my hard on and getting bored )

let me know what you think
I would like to hear your point of view,
that would help me a lot as a fox (don’t know any around me:-(
have a good day

MY ANSWER…
Continue reading “f0xmail: I’m Questioning My Role As A “Fox”. Help!” →

FOXMAIL

So, I have a group of friends – there are 4 of us. I’ll be A and we’ll call the others B, C, and D. We’ve been thicker than thieves since the first day of college and now, since we graduated about 2 years ago and moved to different parts of the country, we still talk daily. We’re all gay but of course some of us were closer than others. C was my BFF and B & D were ol’ skool judys. Anywho, around junior year, I kinda figured that D was into me so I began asking him for favors – money, homework, errands, etc. I kept it under the guise of friendship but I knew he wanted more. I should mention that back then he just wasn’t my type or so I thought. Even though he was attractive, he was the heaviest and we never let him forget it – me more than the others. Toward the end of senior year, B & C got hip to my game(s) and called me out on my bullshit. They threatened to tell him if I didn’t so I confessed to D and things were never quite the same. In conversations, I could tell he only really fucked w/ B & C but tolerated me.
Fast forward to a week ago. All of our schedules and finances finally meshed and we all met up for a winter weekend on the east coast. D showed up and he showed up looking DELICIOUS. It was the first time I’d seen him in person since graduation. He was still the same size but everything that was pudge before was now solid. Physically, he’d changed a little but his spirit hadn’t. He was so humble and witty and kind. We caught up and he told me about his new job and a potential wolf and I smiled through my pain. When I saw him I realized I wanted him. B thinks I should leave D alone and let him be happy for now and see if he circles back. C thinks I’m a fool if I let him get away this time. I’m really torn. Me and D laughed, and we reminisced and made good ground last weekend in mending our relationship. As a friend, I want the best for him but I also want him to be mine because he could be the best for me.

What if I confess my feelings and he reads me my rights?

What would you do?

MY ANSWER…

Continue reading “f0xmail: The Ugly Duckling Became A Cute Swan… and I Want Him Now! Help!” →

FOXMAIL

Ayo Jamari…

I’m an inexperienced wolf from Chi town. Been having trouble meeting other black dudes in my area that get down…but I’m attracted to bruthas that are pretty much the opposite of myself. I like them soft, nerdy type (but NOT fem) niggas that mostly into anime and ready comics. Well, low and behold I was run into this one cute lil’ dude in my local Target. Dude is so so adorable and I been tryna put the moves on him for a minute but I can’t really get a read on him. He could just be one of them geek-ish black dudes but not get down and if he got down do you think he would be into white wolves??? But I did lowkey snap a picture of him
(i feel like a stalker now SMH) so you guys could see if maybe it looks like he mess around.

What do you think?
And how should I approach him?

MY ANSWER…

Continue reading “f0xmail: I’m A Wolf Who Wants A Nerdy Fox. Help!” →