No One Is Really 100% Straight

i was talking to pose one day and she said:

“There are a lot of males out here that are experimenting.”

social media and the foxhole have show me this also.
males you think are “straight” are secretly experimenting.
personally,
i believe that folks aren’t 100% straight or gay.
yes,
this includes males too.
i believe anyone can fall into same sex relations,
even if it’s jackin off or a strong emotional connection.
well a foxholer sent me an article that may prove me right.
it seems there might be some truth to this theory.
this is what i was sent via “the daily mail”

Strictly heterosexual people don’t exist, according to a psychologist who claims more and more men are better defined as ‘mostly straight’.

While most societies promote heterosexuality as the ‘norm’, a leading researcher at Cornell University has found most of us get aroused by both genders.

The paper brings into question strict definitions of sexuality, and posits that instead of categories we should see it as a spectrum.

Lead author Ritch C Savin-Williams, a psychologist specializing in gender studies, warns we still struggle with the concept of bisexuality – particularly when it comes to men. 

Savin-Williams’ new book Mostly Straight: Sexual Fluidity Among Men finds younger generations are increasingly open to ‘looser boundaries’, and interviews 40 men who insist they are ‘straight’ but dabble in liaisons with other men. 

It builds on his study, published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Savin-Williams examined volunteers who identified as either male or female. 

They showed them each porn involving men, and porn involving women, and measured the dilation of their pupils – an indicator of sexual arousal. 

Women’s eyes dilated watching men with women, and watching women with women. 

Men’s eyes dilated watching women masturbate, and watching men masturbate – regardless of their stated sexual preference.

‘We used to think [bisexuality] was only a female phenomenon,’ he told Broadly. His research assessing both men and women shows that is hardly the case. 

In a previous study, Savin-Williams found between two and 11 percent of adults had reported experiencing homosexual feelings. 

However, he believes that figure woefully understates the fluidity of sexual arousal among all people. 

He warns our strong cultural narrative that women can be sexually fluid, and not men, means most males fear expressing those feelings.

Men have gotten so much cultural c**p put on them that even if a man does have some sexual attraction to guys, they would never say it,’ he told Broadly.  

i feel like vixens and males are one in the same when it comes to sexuality.
i hear vixen’s having “girl crushes” and:

“It’s because their wired different”

…as the excuse as to why males can’t/shouldn’t.
i think that’s a crock of shit.
we’re all humans,
with varying emotions,
and can get horny af.
males are not immune to being sexually attracted to another male.
some “straight” dicks do get hard when around a “male crush”.
some may never act on it.
there are just some folks out here that bring the curiosity out.
it doens’t always have to be super masculine either.
it could be really feminine,
androgynous
looking,
or they make you feel instantly comfortable.
the foxholers know.

in my world,
that’s all perfectly okay.
we gotta stop shaming guys for what they might be into,
but then wonder why there’s no honesty about feelings.

lowkey: bisexuality does exist with males too.
stop acting like it doesn’t.
most of the dl are bisexual.

article: the daily mail

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

24 thoughts on “No One Is Really 100% Straight

  1. Love this article. From 5 years old I knew I had an attraction to both sexes. Its funny because i only ever brought girls I was dating/sexing around my family and people never knew i was attracted to dudes because they say I didn’t act feminine or give off a gay vibe. I’ve never hidden my attraction to both sexes at all.

    Something you said earlier in this made me think of my uncle. He is a KNOWN ladies man, I swear he has had sex with about 300 woman that I know. He and I were talking one day and he said to me ” Man, every person on the planet has the potential to be gay. It just takes the right or wrong person at the right or wrong time, and the right or wrong situation to bring it out of them”. That completely change the way I felt about the “straights”

  2. Man, all you gotta do is go to the local barbershop on the weekend (at least that’s when i go) and you see guys in there with their tight ass shirts and pants on. Ain’t no chicks in the barbershop, except the occasional mom that drops her kid off (and she usually not the type they checking for anyway). Guys check out other guys, they do.
    I peep guys in the mirrors checking other guys out.

    What’s funny is my barber will call guys out quick! He will say ain’t no girls in here, why you got them tight ass clothes on cutting off your circulation?! These niggas don’t wanna see you trying to show of you muscles and ass. LOL

    1. Man…I had to go bald and stop going to the barbershop! I used to go to this one on The Bronx right before you get to Mount Vernon. My barber at the time James one day pushed my legs open with his knees, stood in between my legs to line me up. I was like okay, that’s new. One day he keep pushing his dick against my had. I didn’t move it. He lifted up, set his whole crotch on my hand. I politely turned my hand around and was rubbing his balls. After he finished my hair he kept asking me what i was getting into later. The whole staff and majority of the dudes who came on used to try to holla at me

      1. well damn. lol i use to go to the barbershop off the 5 train at the Baychester stop. I remember getting waiting to get my haircut and this one dude was leaning on the counter and his ENTIRE chocolate ass was out. lol. And he had to know it. lol I had to make myself stop looking. lol

      2. SlayingDumbBiatches…. I’ve been to that one too! I used to live not too far from that barbershop so it only made sense to go there. The things I used to see lol

        There’s a Dominican barbershop on E. Tremont and 3rd Ave I used to go to when i first moved to the Bronx. I swore every man in there was gay lol. Tight pants, tight shirts, and the only barber i would let cut my hair used to dance while he was doing it. I mean full on winding and popping his hips and everything right on the chair! Everybody would start dancing and laughing. I was always tripped out every time I went in

  3. I’m not sure if this article is something new or just clarification or further evidence of what has been known. With regard to the Kinsey Scale of Sexuality noted above, it has been known that few people on the scale are 0s (completely—100%– heterosexual) and few on the scale are 7s (completely—100%– homosexual). What may be new is the evaluation of arousal by pupil dilation. People lie but the eyes don’t lie. I suspect that similar results would be found by evaluation of hardness—tumescence—of the penis. People lie but the penis, the dick does not lie.

    It is known that by the age of 25, 25% of men have had a same sex experience that resulted in an orgasm. I don’t think that 25% of men are gay—only that there is a lot of experimentation happening.

    I suspect: Many guys who consider themselves to be gay are probably 5s and 6s on the Kinsey Scale. Few gays are truly 7s. And many guys who consider themselves to be straight are probably 2s and 3s on the Kinsey Scale. And few straights are truly 0s.

    It is also thought that sexual orientation can be judged by 1. what gender one has sex with, 2. what gender one wants to have sex with and 3. what gender one is most comfortable with outside of sex and likes to spend time with. It’s easy to imagine that two of the three answers can be one gender and the third answer can be the other gender.

    This study also reminds us that many of the most vehemently anti-gay persons are themselves “closet cases” with secret same-sex attraction.

  4. This whole article is the reason why I test the waters with these “straight” men from time to time. You never know gets down on the low. I do believe there is a gray area with sexuality nowadays, none of it is simple anymore.

  5. Since everyone agrees I’m going to disagree with it. I don’t believe in all that spectrum stuff. I just think humans are all thots. I also find women beautiful but I don’t like cootie cat….AT ALL.

    You’re either gay, straight or bi. Idk where these percentages came from like it’s tax season or is he just getting 20% off on the heterosexuals on isle five. He’s only 70% straight now…There’s hope. I love HomoMart so much. Everyday Down low prices.

    One thing about me is…Im probably the worst person a dude would want to get “curious” around. I don’t feed into that at all. I’m old fashioned..I like my niggas seasoned and when they know what they want…Im not gonna hold your hand while you decide if you want to pick the red or blue pill.

    I don’t test waters..well not “shark infested” waters. Don’t get bit trying to surf the high tide.

    Now that I’ve said all that to be the opposing voice on this topic.

    How I really feel about this subject:

    It’s interesting but just like no matter needs can be 100% straight, his reasoning is still a theory at best…or maybe he might be on to something.

    I’ve been wondering about a few things of my own. I’ll use Beyonce for example…Why are gay men obsessed with her? Or rather why are they obsessed with “powerful women” or divas to begin with?

    Do you have a good guess Jamari?

    Hmm as far as sexuality being complex. I still don’t think it is at all. I think everything is balanced perfectly in accordance to nature…what I do think is complex..and the source of our “findings” is the human mind.

    It seems to me that all this is a mental game.

    Instead of him talking about complexity of sex, when it isn’t…he should really be interested in how the human mind feeds into the development of our species based on surrounding factors.

    This is scratching the surface. I need him to dig deep and explain his views on bi-sexuals. What triggers a person to like both sexes?

    Let’s just be real here…Man & woman…equals a baby. We know that.

    Man/Man & Woman/Woman equals a good time.

    Just how far are humans from animals?

    It seems like the majority of animals have a mating season, some have homosexual behavior and then the dark side of animals include cannibalism, territorial aggressive behavior…etc. And I’ll be darn, humans are the same way and do the same things…

    It is often said that if you hold another’s man’s gaze for 5 seconds or more you have him.. I’ve held a guy’s gaze for 7 seconds. That pipe was as good as mine. You can definitely look someone in the eyes and tell their intentions. Body language is key, until you go to another country, a new territory…a new set of rules.

    This is getting long and I’d like to discuss it more but I can’t for now. Nice one to study about.

  6. I gotta disagree. First off, that’s a small ass sample size to draw generalizations from.

    I also find the Kinsey scale too simplistic and ironically just as rigid as society’s views of sex.

    I have no interests in penises aside from my own. How can the Kinsey scale account for that difference?

    I do believe there are people that are 100% straight.

    It all comes back to what you consider to be homosexual tendencies. If you are already homosexual you’re going to have a skewed perception of that already.

    For instance, dudes masturbating to porn in the presence of other dudes isn’t necessarily indicative of some curiousity of men to me. Some people like to be watched and others are so immersed in pornography they could care less who else is in the room. Same thing with running trains, something I always thought was very gay at first. If you really observe you’ll see it’s almost like a competition to see who’s most virile, not so much gay.

    Same thing with dudes walking around naked in locker rooms. Some dudes like to show their dominance by showing they have better bodies or bigger dicks.

    I know the results give gay men the idea that a lot more men are up for grabs, but keep in mind just because a “straight” man can fuck you doesn’t mean he’s capable of developing any kind emotional connection to you. There are people out there like that as well.

    1. The attraction or curiosity could be hidden behind the competiveness. however I agree with your point about men and their emotional desire.

      For some, it’s as clear as day. For others, it’s muddy waters. The thing is, what’s so interesting, the others is so fucking large even if the Kinsey Scale is right or wrong on this claim, there’s is over 7 billion in world that the possibility of bisexuals are majority or equal heterosexuals is highly likely.

  7. I think things like this are dangerous and do kinda push an “agenda” in that they can cause some gay men to get too emursed & hopeful in this mind set of; “yeah most dudes Can be got, if u just flirt enough” and it’s like….no, they can’t! to prove this all you have to do is mentally put yourself in the SAME shoes but with YOUR circumstances; for instance I’m not a gay man that wants to be, or feels they are in competition nor the same league with women. I can visually see when a women is beautiful / sexy, and if she lightly flirted with me in a social setting (alot do) I would flirt back (in her mind, this would show I’m into her) HOWEVER if she really turned up the heat and wanted to engage in sex, I’d truly be uninterested in doing so, wouldn’t be offended or disgusted, I’d actually be flattered but still generally uninterested, so The same applies for straight men, even if they “flirt” back or seem extra nice, most guys are just not interested in taking it that far when they are only “mostly” straight, just like I’m not that interested in going for a women even tho, by this scale, I’m mostly gay

    1. This is true, bc theres so many homos that doesnt understand theres a line in the sand. And you dont cross even if that mofos is sexy af.

    2. Best comment!

      Straight are suspected to be sooo sexually fluid, but most gay men aren’t even interested in changing sexual positions, much less seeing a vagina. Lol it can be perceived as an agenda.

  8. Disagree.. Lol why can’t some homos just understand that there are men who ONLY like vagina! Stop trying to get your ass beat and handed on a platter trying to “test the waters” with dudes because YOU believe most people are a “little bi” because that’s not the case! I remember I once refused to DANCE with this chick at the club who was trying to come onto me because I just felt uncomfortable. I don’t even want to GRIND on a woman let alone get intimate with one. The thought of kissing a woman even makes me uncomfortable (I’m very anal on fluids) and I’ve met many gay men who feel the same. So I know for damn sure there are plenty straight men who barf at the thought of getting intimate with a dude.

    Shit, I even know WOMEN who cringe at the thought of getting intimate with another female. That whole “women are bisexual” shit is a bunch of bullshit. We need to stop generalizing a whole gender based on a few short polls or a “turn up culture” that is only prevalent in a small part of the world.

    I gotta side with Jammy & Jay here. Also I don’t have time to “seek” a “curious” guy. You better know what you’re into before we get acquainted. WTF I got time for trying to play guessing games? LMAO and it’s hilarious because a lot of gays enjoy this shit and I will never understand it. All this playing with fire will get you burnt one day I will never understand the curiosity of trying to get with an inexperienced guy who is unaware of what they want.

  9. Jamari, this is why your blog is hot. The right topics show the spectrum of the human process of thought. I like how some foxholers talk about the what ifs and others are raising red flags.

    I think from reading these posts it’s clear that the possibility for a man to be bi or “curious” is there…but then there is also a risk.

    Many Foxholers have seen or heard of several cases where gay men have been murdered testing things out or interpeting things wrong.

    This current generation though….I think with the push to “blend” gender/sexual norms…a lot of feelings are gonna get hurt or worse. A lot of people attribute this to Lady GaGa’s born this way stance. I’m not sure when it started but with straight men being allowed to impend on traditional gay culture and characteristics…a lot of probable possibilities can get you f**ked up instead of f**ked.

    This is why I always say…Things need a balance or better and clear-cut definition cuz when things get muddled….Issa mess…

    Someone brought up huge points that I wanted to touch on…emotional attachment and what we interpret as “homoerotic tendencies”

    The ending of my original post was definitely relating to how we may perceive something as gay or a sign to advance but in another country it is “normal” behavior.

    To go off what someone else posted, I think (hypothesize) some men like pursuing curious dudes because it strokes their egos. The rush of “converting” someone to their “side”.

    Men like the thrill of a chase.

    I’m probably in the minority with this but I think if you have to coax a possible curious dude with drugs or money, he isn’t worth it.

    1. ^im really appreciative and blessed to get such amazing and thought provoking comments.
      the foxhole is lit.
      i’m glad the foxholer sent me this entry because it has started a GREAT discussion!!!
      more!!!!

  10. I disagree. Many gay men have no problem acknowledging they have absolutely no attraction to women, so you should have no problem accepting the opposite in regards to straight men. I do believe there are far more people that are bi or share some form of same sex attraction than once believed, but the whole “all men are secretly bi” just seems like a typical gay mans fantasy.

  11. I don’t think the naysayers appreciated the depth of sexual arousal and attraction described in this article. Almost all of the points raised have been discussed in the theory. For every gay who “hates vagina” there’s an anecdote of a “mostly” gay (not bi) man who has either had sex with women, occasionally finds a woman attractive (perhaps not so much to have sex), or enjoys pornographic images of women. It’s not hard to imagine the reverse is true.

    No one is suggesting that all of the men are secretly waiting for the right man to turn him out but the study (and some of the experiences here) suggest that shit happens. Labels are convenient and mostly true but there is some gray. The possibility of offending some miscellaneous straight man does not change that reality.

    And it’s an agenda? Really? Hell, there’s an agenda for the gays to be “prayed straight” or otherwise magically conform to gender norms for that matter. There’s a controversial study released recently that suggests that some gay men can go straight. It’s on the ABC News site. Something to ponder while on the topic.

  12. Right. This blog do be getting lit. What makes this good is that some Foxholers pull logic from previous experiences. Another post I always wanted elaboration on was “Gaydar”. Where does Gaydar fit into this?

    I’ve clocked several dudes and have been right with some but with others Ive been wrong in the past…and this is not based off of visual apperance…more of a sensation.

    How come some men (& women) have superb Gaydar but others don’t?

    What fuels their logic.

    Is it that birds of a feather flock together & I can spot a rainbow on cloudy day, OR is it that I find this nigga so fine, my mind registers everything he does as a flag for his sexuality to satisfy my desires for him?

    He looked at me for two seconds longer than normal…#Suspect

    *Drops panties*

    Also, is this behavior ever seen in hetero Vixens?

    Have you ever heard a female say, “You too cute to be gay?”

    It’s like despite you being obviously gay, her brain is creating some kind of scenerio where you should be straight to appease her attraction towards you?

    This has me wondering if their really is a correlation between gay men and hetero women thought processing because to my knowledge, most heterosexual men don’t think this way.

    If this is the case, do dominant “Butch” lesbians fall in line with hetero men thought process?

    What has me even more stumped is that I have noted gays, bisexuals and heterosexuals….but what about asexuals?

    How do you account for individuals with no attraction to either sex? Are asexuals in denial?

    For example. I watch straight porn…but I watch it for the men because well…..I like naked men. I will watch a man eat out a woman because usually…I like to see a man in action

    However, how many gay men watch straight porn and get turned on, not only because of the men but because they wish they were in the place of the woman?

    How many gay men watch lesbian porn?

    I’ve heard hetero Vixens watch gay porn for men AND women.

    Their reasonings go from straight porn focuses on degrading women as objects, to lesbian porn caters more to women universally and they win either way.

    All this is such a mental trip for me.

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