It’s A Good Year For Wolves To Walk Out Your Life!

2017 has truly been the year of wake up calls.
it has also been the year of unexpected goodbyes as well.
it really has been exposing who is really in your corner.
i thought i had good straight wolves as friends,
but i see just how i meant nothing to some of them…


we been friends for a couple years.
i could actually have said that i loved him.
i told that wolf everything about me.
he did the same.
the problem with him is he was always about “power” and “control”.
do things so the forest dwellers would be scared of you.
i don’t move like that.
well he hit me up because he was venturing to a new career.
one that i was happy to see he was good at.
well during a convo,
he asked me about getting verified for a blue check on twitter.
this blue check would mean he “made it”,
in his words.
now he just started his career and didn’t build up a solid fan base.
i have this foxhole,
that pulls in over 300k a month,
and i don’t even have a blue check on my own twitter.
it isn’t important.
putting in the work to get the respect is more important to me.
so i asked his reasoning:

“pineapples would feel like shit if they saw me with a blue check!”

for him,
it was always about doing something to one up pineapples.
the ones who he was cool with,
but ended up
doing him dirty.
so i told him to focus on getting his clout up before he requests to be verified.

“why can’t you ever just say yes and agree to things?”

needless to say we got in a big argument and he hung up on me.
few days later,
he un-followed me from all my social media accounts.

the “straight” co worker

i met him at my second to last job a year ago.
he would always try to get my attention and be cool.
it was all love..
or so i thought?
when a celeb that he mentioned he liked showed up on random at the job,
i hit him up and promptly introduced the two.
they took pictures and he got an autograph.
he was happy.
i like seeing people around me happy.
he claimed:

you real cool!”

so after i got laid off,
he did a few weeks later.
we would talk on texts and he would only want to facetime me.
there was times we would facetime until 2am.
sometimes we talked about music or even sex.
he was “straight” tho.
i noticed when his wolf pack would come around,
he would ignore my texts.

that made me stop hitting him up.
the thing with him is he was depending on me to raise his self esteem.
after he got laid off,
he took it hard.
from all he told me,
he was a spoiled wolf who can’t function without someone else.

“this is why i hit you up.
you can guide me on what to do next with my life.”

he was using me as a therapist.
at first,
i would give him suggestions.
he would take them,
but then he would hit me back a few days later with the same problem.
that was becoming draining.
during that time.
i was going mentally going through it and needed a break.
he was blowing up my texts heavy once he couldn’t reach me.

“i had a mental relapse.
we need to talk!”

“i gotta tell you about this hoe i fucked over the weekend.”

so i told him i needed some “me” time because i was struggling.
he never hit me back after that.
few days later,
he un-followed me from all my accounts.
…see ya?

the double agent

i met this dominican wolf at that last job as well.
he was cool
or so i thought.
he would try to get my attention at work,
but wasn’t as heavy with it like the story above.
we exchanged numbers when i left.
not gonna lie,
i thought he was cute and had this “feeling” about him.
he texted me once or twice but the conversation was dry af.
i stopped responded.
i stopped caring.

peace sign emoji

so one of my ex co workers hit me up and told me how he asked her for me.
he was asking her all these questions about:

if i was still working at the new job
how he heard i was fired
all this other shit

…like this mofo didn’t have my number.
she also told me how he was chummy with my old boss.
i told her how he randomly requested to follow me on my social media.
when i asked him for his socials when we were working together,
he acted like he didn’t have one.
i think he was keeping tabs on what i was doing for my old boss.
well he never spoke to me on the socials.
he was just watching.
well he ended up getting fired last week or so.
his job as “spy bitch” was done.
so guess what happened next?
that un-follow.


work wolf

but not least.
after everything we been through,
he came back into my life a few months ago.
on random,
he would hit me up,
but it wasn’t like before.
the day i was laid off from my last job,
he actually got fired from the one we use to work at.
he did some dumb shit at work that i told him to stop doing.
he was looking for a new job,
but he had no bites.
a few weeks ago,
i asked if he found something new yet:

not really.”

he has been following me on social,
but things changed.
as of recent,
the pictures of the random vixens he was “dating” stopped.
every vixen looked “different”,
although he claimed he was in a steady relationship.
he has completely shut down from his posting now.
he use to like/watch mine,
but he isn’t as interactive as before.
after he how he ghosted me,
ignored me when i tried to reach out,
i don’t feel as comfortable with him as i once did.
he expects me to chase him,
but then treats me like he does the vixens he plays games with.
i lost his respect somewhere down the line.
i decided to let him do his thing,
but that “i’m never leaving your life jamari” talk being bullshit.
his usual.
i guess everyone was right when it came to him.
i’m moving on from that toxic situation.
he doesn’t have that hold he had on me as before.
so he hasn’t un-followed yet,
but he is gone.

surprisingly enough,
all the vixens i know are the most loyal.
some of the straight wolves try to use me,
but the vixens see all the beauty and worth in me.
it sucks because i barely have straight home wolves anymore,
but most of them probably weren’t down for me as i thought.
it hurt to be discarded like trash,
but it didn’t linger like i would have last year.
i’m okay with the changes i been going through.
it’s funny how 2017 has been showing me a lot.
it’s helping me grow into a better fox.
this is the year of the wake up calls tho.
i hope they get theirs.

13 thoughts on “It’s A Good Year For Wolves To Walk Out Your Life!

  1. Man, this post like most of your entries came right on time. I’ve dealt with this from straight male friends time and time again. I have a very small circle of friends which I feel gets smaller every year because of foolishness.

    I had this one straight homie who I used to hang and explored with. We had similar taste in style, music, shows , video games you name it. As most people do we got busy and lost a little touch but I would always be the one trying to keep the friendship going. Calling to see if he was ok, asking if he wanted to hang out at a new spot, even going no do far as to buy him a art book for a bday gift. It took me a minute to understand that this person was only my “friend” when it was convenient for him.

    Then there my wolf “friend”, after all the ups and downs we’ve gone through this pineapple has honed completely ghost on me. I was worried and sad for the first few weeks but now I’m just blah. I cut communication with him the beginning of the year and funny when I stopped giving a fuck and blocked him this pineapple found ways from different numbers to try to reach out to me. Now that I let him back in things flipped and I haven’t heard from him. Just like with WW he told me no matter what he had my back and if anyone ever tried me or hurt me he would fuck them up. 🤦🏾‍♂️ Shit I felt for

    The same saying for dating I apply to friendships. When people want to be in your life they will make that effort to be in your life. We’re part of the problem too, we’ve got to stop giving our all to people who haven’t earned it he’ll not even our all . No more giving 20 percent and the other person is giving 5%.

    1. ^im now seeing this smh.

      you are absolutely right mikey.
      i feel sad and also angry.
      no one wants to feel used and discarded.
      i knew left for years.
      i mean he was there for so many things.
      one incident and im thrown away.
      i couldn’t deal with him anymore tho.
      it was for the best.

      the other two were not that deep.
      after all that,
      ended up being a ghost.
      im disappointed it even turned out like that,
      but i started to see him for who he really is.
      so im more disappointed than anything else.

  2. Tajan, I don’t even think it’s about gay and straight. It’s about character. Most people are selfish, and if they see a person that they can take advantage of, they will do it. No matter how long it may take them to show their true selves, eventually it does happen. These people saw your kindness and mistook it for weakness. You gave them what they needed, both financially and mentally. Most of all, you fed their ego. Once you were no longer able to, or willing to provide them with either, you were of no use to them any longer.
    In the long run they will be the ones to feel it. They will never be able to cultivate real relationships, because they will always be looking to see what they can get out of that person. They will be lonely, even though they may be surrounded by a lot of people.

    Don’t sweat it. Move on and continue doing you. Don’t let them change you, though. Someone will come along that appreciates what you do for them and your company.

  3. Wow this entry has me feeling some kind of way. I have had to open my eyes to these str8 friendships as well actually starting last year and coming full circle this year. I know I have taken up for str8 dudes in the past thinking that they came with less baggage and drama than gay men, but I got a wake up call. In the past 2 months, I have had two str8 homies who I have always been there for, shit on me royally. I helped both out financially and both have gotten ghost like it is nothing. I have given them way more leverage than I would ever give one of my gay homies and none of my gay homies have left me hanging like these two. But they need not worry, they will get to see the long handled spoon side of me. I am seeing that str8 dudes are the worst because most of them have kids and they shit on their kids, their wives, girlfriends, so why should I be surprised when they shit on me. I guess I was under the assumption that str8 men operated by the Man code of not suffering from bitchassness. The longer I live, I see it is not much difference only sex between gay and str8 dudes. If you got bad character, you just got bad character. I can admit that the shallow part of me has let str8 dudes make it more because of their masculinity and I held gay dudes to a higher standard because they were not str8 acting enough in my book. I guess I have got caught up in if I have a lot of str8 homies, I am less gay than the next dude over there. It goes without fail that str8 dudes always wanna a shoulder to cry on, a favor, someone to listen but the few who I interact with who know my life get a little uncomfortable if I approach them about a gay topic but ironically ask me advice all the time about females. At the end of the day, my gay and str8 friends are alot alike both sets wont have time for you when they are in the midst of trying to romance or pursue someone but want you to drop everything when they need something. I am ready for some Kool Loyal Down Ass friends, no matter what their orientation.

    J, I am also seeing that it is the females in my life who have been the most loyal and caring even when I fall short in seeing about them, they always look out for me.

    I truly dont have the answer about this one.

  4. Wow my spell check is off today. I understand I’ve been there myself a bunch of friendships that fall through the cracks but again so be it

    Those who leave make open spaces for better

    I’ll admit as a male the openness you give on this platform would be extremely intimidating person to person as I said before men are taught either directly or indirectly to only go so far with emotions

    Speaking personally there are times when I’m making personal break throughs with people I would sabotage the relationship
    Why because I have weird issues with intimacy I don’t know if it’s a male thing a black thing or a city thing I just know keeping to myself kept me protected

    But as I grew older I realized that it’s not me protecting myself from bad relationships it’s me stopping myself from good relationships

    And the only one who can really harm me is me

    In your regards Jamari you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong the only thing you can be is the light in the tunnel if you shine to bright for other ppl that is not your problem

    And if anyone decides to discard you that’s not your problem it really is there’s and it’s something about them they haven’t faced or realized and that is truly the sad fact especially in males

    I’m still trying to conquer my fear of intimate and close relationships with both males and females but for you don’t sweat it any pain you get from it it’s just more so you fighting your ego

    the other person you literally have no control over the best way the simplest way the hardest way is to just be upfront with how you feel and think

    If you let the other person know that and they still feel that way it’s out of your hands and any response you get from them shows just how much they understand themselves to ultimately understand you

    It’s a lot of abstract thinking but I hope this helps all you have to do is know who you are and accept that everything else will fall into place

    Now get to nudes and the tea

    Have a good weekend everyone!!!!

    1. ^it’s interesting you say that.

      left was always open with his feelings.
      the “straight” co worker was as well.
      i didn’t get to know the double agent and ww…
      well it was very above the surface with him at times.
      he had his own set of issues.

      i need to meet stronger wolves.

    2. @James…I’m like you in the aspect that I let those people who fucked me over, make it hard for those who come later. I am not into trying to establish close and intimate relationships right now. There are a few people in my life that have shown me goodness and kindness and I keep them close, but the rest I keep at arms length. Maybe one day I’ll change, maybe not. But I do know now that I let their actions speak louder than their words.

  5. That just shows you that these people were not friends. They were there for what you could give THEM. Once you can no longer provide that, they don’t want to deal with you. Give people time and they will show you their true colors, and if you give them enough rope, sooner or later they’re going to hang themselves with it. They showed you, so it’s time to move on. It may hurt initially, but you will get over it. Especially when you tell yourself they weren’t really friend.

    1. ^you are absolutely right.
      im glad they did what they did.
      they caught me at a good time when i was bettering myself.
      it makes the moving on process much easier.

  6. I think men are weird even myself. We get so swept up in appearances and conquest because that’s what we THINK being a man is.

    It’s pretty twisted I think there’s more wiggle room for women because ya know pussy is the ultimate goal bot saying they don’t have there own set of problems but as a male I feel like there’s so many requirements to meet but now guide book

    So if they come and go so be it

    The world is so monkey see monkey do nowadays at least you set and follow your own path.

    1. ^it sucks that these friendships have gone on life support.
      i wanted to ask myself if it was me,
      but i provided nothing but a solid friendship to these wolves.
      i gave them me,
      as i give the vixens,
      and i give the foxhole.
      shit like this can make you feel like you’re not good enough.

  7. Reaping and sowing that is why I keep it 100 with folks, if I want to smash let them know and they decide,so we both know what is up! I tell my truth not anyone else, I worry more about me than you or anyone else, I am really into me , myself, and I , God says I am a king and I believe it to be so why worry about people who ceiling is my floor.(truth) watch him do it, remover what goes out has to return to the sender. Happy Easter everyone put God first and only then will he fight your battle.

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