fomo.
have you ever felt this emotion?
its an acronym for:
FEAR OF MISSING OUT
in many of our lives,
we have felt we were missing out heavy on life,
events,
or even someone you really wanted.
it has the ability to make you feel like a loser amongst your peers.
usually,
it’s when we are at our loneliest.
Everyone looks shiny and new
Everyone is doing exciting shit
Everyone is looks shiny, new, and doing exciting shit without ME
is that really the case thoooooo?…
during a convo with one of my home vixens the other day,
she called me out:
“I think you suffer from extreme amounts of FOMO.
You always look at others and think they’re doing better without you.“
she was right.
i’ll see others getting more love and feel like i don’t matter.
i’ll watch others be at events and wondered why i didn’t get an invite.
ill see others achieving their career goals and feel like i’m a nobody.
it doesn‘t incite jealousy or hate so much,
but it makes me emotionally beat myself into an anxiety filled stupor.
i have a nasty habit of comparing myself to other people.
even during a pandemic,
i am literally feeling left out because others are outside.
it stems from moments of not feeling accepted to being picked last in sports.
i’ve developed this idea that i don’t fit in and i’m an outcast.
Don’t even get me started when it comes to our POI (persons of interest)…
that can be a real mind fuck,
esoeically if you stalk their social media.
they look good,
probably fuck good,
and have this fantasy they’ll treat you good.
Is FOMO all in the mind then?
Are people really out to ignoring you?
Is that dude really good as his social media portrays?
Are you a loser like fr fr?
i feel like fomo only happens when you have a strong desire to fit in on social media.
social media doesn’t help because its all based on the superfical shit that never really mattered.
would we realy know someone is on vacation if we didn’t have stories of their lives?
would we know their inner thoughts if we didn’t read their tweets?
we wouldn’t know how people lived and acts before technology showed us.
we didn’t know how dudes really got down unless we got to know them.
i’ve always admired those who can be on and off.
they don’t care what others are doing.
hell,
people would be shocked to know i experience fomo by my attitude.
it made me wonder about the mind fuck that is fomo…
Are we truly “missing out” on these moments?
…or is it just a mirage of your insecurities and fears on the big screen that is your mind?
This is so true. Social media has glorified everyone’s lives to such an extent today, that FOMO has become so habitual. Although, I’ve realized that we’re anyway always going to be missing out, so might as well take the decisions that make us the happiest. What’s more, we must remind ourselves to stop comparing our back stories to the highlight reels of others. Great post!
Would love to know what you think of something I wrote on similar lines,
https://notjustanidea.wordpress.com/2020/12/14/the-truth-about-fomo/
Its especially hard during Covid bc all my peers don’t give a fuck they’re out in the midst of it and I’m being precautious and it’s like this entire year has been a total wash besides the new president elect in every aspect especially personally. hopefully we can get back right in 2021
Life is what you make it. I feel FOMO every other 5 minutes of the day. I constantly have to check myself on that shit.
When Chadwick B. died (RIP) … a lot of his inspiring quotes surfaced. He once said during a commencement speech at Howard: take your time, but don’t waste your time.
Ultimately, devoting mental energy towards comparing and contrasting oneself against another is an egregious act against your personal self-worth.
Everyone’s path is different; Everyone’s life lessons are different; Everyone’s path is valid.
^i love this martin.
thank you for sharing your words.
i think the trap is watching others and comparing your circumstances to theirs.
as ghost said,
we don’t know what folks are dealing with.
good moments are truly just highlight reels and i always need to remember that.
Can be hard but you just gotta love yourself. Was watching a youtuber on a random recommended vid a few months back and in part of it he was saying how he separates 30 mins out of his day to affirm 5 great things about himself. Talking out loud with it too. I laughed but maybe the idea is not as crazy as it looked. You may think folks you see on social media etc are all grand but deep down them mfs be regular ass people with regular ass problems. Maybe dealing with even heavier shit than you can imagine. Never compare yourself to anyone ever. That is the biggest mistake and the biggest waste of energy in life. You can use a person as motivation, like say in trying to get a sick body like them but to compare, dwell and ultimately dog yourself out? Nah that’s a whole waste of time.
^ love this and thank you!
i’m gonna try that affirming situation for 30 minutes a day as well