they say in life that you will experience one or two great loves.
they also say in life you will experience one great friendship.
well i haven’t found my great love yet,
but i did have a great friend.
its hard to meet people these days.
“stand at the front line with you” people.
death to us part people.
whether you want to pursue a relationship or kick it on a platonic level.
i miss my great friend.
life has been so different since he has been gone.
its like everything wrong with people has been enhanced xs 1000.
i started to see most people these days are just “stand ins”.
in realizing that,
i have no one i can really share myself with.
i mean i have associates,
and i consider karaoke one of my best vixen friends,
but i don’t have any male gay friends in my circle.
you try and get close to someone in the life and either:
a) they want to find ways to fuck you
b) they want to act like they sitting on a panel of rhoa
especially from someone whose life is a war zone of bitterness and ignorance.
its like 95% of individuals in the life act like glamorized vixens.
ones who are picture perfect and never did anything wrong in life.
no one wants to resolve disagreements and “shake on it”.
everything has to be some damn “throwing shade”.
i always wondered…
how can you call someone your “friend”,
but then try and shade them in the next breath to strangers?
like how does that work?
using flaws and secrets to expose “friends” for the world.
its like a real life girl’s bathroom.
when you had someone in your life who:
listened to every word i said
sung songs together on the phone
was the shoulder to cry on
didn’t judge me for the dumb shit i did
taught me how to not take myself so seriously
saw the light inside me i couldn’t see
understood and accepted me in all my awkwardness
allowed me to get comfortable with this life when i wasn’t
…well they raised the bar in what a friendship is.
we knew each other like the back of our hands.
hell he knew that i liked when it came to wolves.
his “i want you to meet this wolf” was on point when it came to me.
besides all that,
he taught me what it meant to be a good friend.
he is gone.
my great friend is gone.
i miss star fox so much.
i’m trying to hold out hope that i will meet someone with his same qualities one day.