i bet you they were planning on celebrating big for new years.
boxing wolf,
anthony joshua,
is probably still on a high from winning against the paul jackal.

the praise be praising
the lust be lusting
the new coochie be coochieing

who knew that after a week of bliss,
anthony joshua would be going into 2026 in pain:

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from a tragic car accident and losing his two friends…

one of my fav male soul singers is d’angelo.
sometimes,
i play his first album because of the feeling it gives me.
his remake of “cruisin” puts me in such a good mood.

his second album brings back so much nostalgia.
don’t even get me started…

on the video that was one of my gay awakenings as a kid.

from the lips,
to the chiseled jawline,
to the bawdy (a bawdy he was actually uncomfortable with)
he was a gorgeous and soulful black wolf.
imagine my shock,
after posting that last entry on x-twitter…

you know what’s wild?
i was looking for a *cough* project *cough* the other night,
and randomly stumbled upon one of mr. cali’s older projects.
i said to myself:

“I haven’t seen him in a long time.
I wonder what he is up to?”

…but then,
something happened and i forgot to go research.
my foxy senses are CRAZY because a Foxholer sent me this update last night…

This is not what I wanted when I said I wanted to be present for this new year.
Of course,
I step onto Elon’s social swamp and on day one of 2025,
I’m hit with the grim reminder of just how fragile life is.

it took me back to NOLA in 2020 for mardi gras with one of my best friends.
bourbon street was intense…

a breakup
a job loss
rejection
the death of someone close to us
setbacks that make us question our path
being ostracized from people we thought were our friends/family
struggling to accept not being straight
being violated and no one wants to listen or believe you/sides with the abuser

all these unwelcome guests can open the door to depression.
one moment…

when you share a deep and profound connection with someone,
it’s like your souls are intertwined forever.
you feel each other even when you’re miles apart or not speaking anymore.
when you think of someone and they reach out to you out the blue,
they were on the same spiritual wave as you.
even when someone randomly crosses your mind and you get stupid horny.
they were thinking of you sexually,
or thinking of you while they were having sex with someone else.
they call that remote seduction.

I believe that’s called a soul tie.

even when they’re no longer with us in the physical realm,
the connection remains,
although in a different form.

amidst all the chaos in my life,
i’ve been grappling with a deep and unexplained sadness.
sure,
it’s partly due to feeling overwhelmed and just done with it all,
but there was something more that i couldn’t explain.

And then it hit me like a ton of breaks…