23 thoughts on “rest in peace to @whatsurig”

1. I’ve been in his shoes that feeling that you are undesired or unloved in a community that is already extremely rough on others within and etc. I just know that was a lot to deal with. I hate that he wasn’t able to find love or at least make peace without it and get to a better space.

   I pray for his family and friends that have lost him.

2. Followers ≠ friends who check in on you

   May he have found peace and rest

3. The amount of people taking their own lives is frightening.. scarier so because one never knows who is next, it could be a friend, family member etc.
   Just yesterday I had a convo with a stunningly beautiful young lady, a former Miss Universe Jamaica, n a top runner up in the Miss Universe contest.. on the outside, all U see is this strikingly beautiful woman, accompanied, model international, traveled the world etc.. yet as she told me she was most times unhappy,felt lost, n unloved.. on the outside U would never know what was happening with her..
   One’s beauty, exquisite body is the person’s exterior, what’s inside, how they see themselves is n may be totally opposite.
   I don’t know what can be done to stop the spate of suicide, however I’d say show support, love to friends, family, accept them, even with their flaws, hopefully they will feel worthy n stay here a while longer, when they get the urge to give up.I have a close friend that I love dearly, he’s like a son, younger brother, I worry about him at times, but all I can do is chk in, n try n boost his joy, when he’s down.

4. this comments…
   whew!
   kudos all around!

5. I think it is also important for us to stress to Black gay men that our lives DO NOT END AT 30. Maybe for whites, because they age poorly anyway, but most Black men come into their own at 30. We also have a little more money and better sense when we hit 30.

   1. Exactly what I think

      There’s no real gay role models for millennials because being out is a new concept
      Gen z is seeing it

      We didn’t

      So people born before 95 looked up to Mariah Beyoncé Whitney and Janet

      And the industry is notoriously cruel to woman

      So gay men do the same thing.

   2. Damn I’m almost 58 and having the time of my life

      1. Immanuel!!!! Great to hear from you. What happened to your blog???

   3. This is key. AIDS has killed off so many of our older Black gay/bi men but so many still do exist and this younger generation is the heirs to all of the struggle that occurred before. All the positive posts in the world don’t negate the need for self-love, for us to affirm and love each other (however we look, however much or little we have, wherever we are in life), and to lift each other up. “Black men love Black men is the revolutionary act” is as important today as it was when Joseph Beam wrote it decades ago. That includes Black LGBTQ in general. Let’s hold each other up and if you know someone in trouble, please do all you can to help them get the help they need.

6. SIGH….you look at this guy, as well as the other recent social figures who have committed suicide recently and you figure they all look good, they got plenty of friends, their SM feed is engaging and they send signs that all is not well. And the empty,, flattened emotions displayed by the ” followers” miss it.

   They “Like” every damn thing. They don’t even stop to read the caption. They just wiggle their index finger Like and scroll. That is the fault line of SM, you are surrounded by fake people, living fake lives, Liking Everything including PAIN meanwhile a brother decides to end this emptiness and stop HIS pain.

   And the fake, empty Followers will suddenly open their eyes in shock, spewing emotional words of care and RIP . And then those followers use their index finger and move on to their next victim.

   So no, he did not kill himself. SM killed him.

   1. They’re scared to take a break cuz like a meme I saw yesterday said

      People wanna prove to social media they aren’t down bad

      I know a lot of people about to be fucked up cuz they did fake Ppp applications to buy cars and go shopping last summer

      Grown men who didn’t have proper parenting and understand that was a trap

      Did they think the government said “applications open” was gonna let hundreds of thousands of Black people get ahead just for having a fake LLC?

      Unfortunately this is just the beginning of when Black gay mens reality sets in

      And they realize they can’t use sex appeal muscles and being shirtless to further their lives. Onlyfans is short sighted

      So when they’re 30+ still looking at a bleak dating pool ( the number of onlyfans workers I see crying about being single when that’s part of the problem with the sexual obsession and lack of monogamy in. The community is something I won’t get into in this post)

      And they not well off financially it’s a recipe for emotional disaster

      1. I hate to say it but we need to cut the vogue ball umbilical cord as well

         It’s great that we have families where people can feel supported but how many times have we seen gay mothers and fathers fucking their gay kids making them even more unstable

         Getting dolled up and stealing out of stores to put a fit together and walk face
         I think the gay families need to be showing these young men how to remain humble out the way and command a salary

         There’s far too much focus on anti aging and being pretty when there’s no internal work being done

         Ok /EndRant

   2. ^chills reading this.
      so on point.
      thank you for leaving this comment.
      love love loves reading stuff like this.

7. What is going on with our black men? Are we falling so hard for what we see on these social media sites? What you see is not a full reality of these people’s lives. Without your health and mental health you have nothing. May he Rest In Peace!

8. About an hour ago,a guy I follow on IG sent me a DM informing me that this guy had died from suicide.I mentioned to him that this was the 3rd suicide of a black man I had heard about this week from people I follow on IG.
   Back in January Essence Magazine posted an article about Black men and suicide after Regina King’s son Ian died from suicide.The article mentioned an organization called blackmenheal.org that offers Free mental health services.You can receive 8 free therapy sessions.

   Please check out that website or call National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255.

   1. ^ 110%

   2. That was a thoughtful and responsible post man.

   3. Thank you Colette!

9. Tragic..

   Please , please my Bothers seek help if you ever THINK OF TAKING YOUR OWN LIFE!!!!! NO ! NO! NO! .

   It gets better and whatever you are feeling will pass. May his spirit find peace and my prayers to his loved ones .

   1. ^ i really feel like this pandemic has awakened the mental illnesses in many people.
      the random acts of violence is the first sign.

      1. Actually he had a boyfriend that posted that he was the love of his life….

         1. ^ so why did the love of his life take his own life?
            isn’t that strange?
            dude was posting how much he wanted love,
            to be respected,
            and to be like other relationships on his twitter timeline.
            on his pages,
            you don’t see any pics or videos with a man.
            suddenly a random is claiming the victim was the love of his life?

            sounds sus.

            1. Some one could love the skin off you but if you don’t love yourself there’s not a lot they can do if your not willing to seek help

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