MY BEST BY DATE SHOULD BE TOMORROW
i’m still kinda sick today.
i can tell my body has been fighting off what’s going on.
this is totally my fault tho.
i be stupid.
so i made some bomb-ass chicken when i first got a jar of sour cream.
i got it like 2 or 3 weeks ago.
when i seasoned my chicken on sunday,
it said the best by date was a week ago.
i made a lot of things with sour cream around that time and felt fine.
the chicken was already seasoned before i saw the cover.
it was one of those moments i decided to take a chance.
i cooked the chicken on monday and…
SO COMEDIANS ARE A TARGET NOW? THANK WILL SMITH?
i think this is what comedians feared after “the slap” tbh.
they felt like even if they made a joke about someone,
they would be liable to get slapped or put in a chokehold.
who knew dave chapelle would be next?
he got tackled by a hyena with a gun at the hollywood bowl…
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MY GREATEST SKILL WAS BEING “THE IDIOT” ON MY DATING RESUME
i’ve had many jobs in my life.
Therapist
Social Worker
Stylist
Personal Assistant
Driver
Prostitution Whore
Trash Collector
…but the one job that i never did successfully was to be “me“.
i know you are wondering what i’m fonting about.
i have been all of those things to males that i really wanted to be with.
i saw one i took a liking to,
or realized that he was attracted to me,
and…
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SAM ASHGARI WANTS TO MAKE SURE HE IS RICH AFTER MARRYING BRITNEY SPEARS
you know what?
i’m always right.
when i saw this new story about britney spears and sam asghari,
the first thing i said out loud was:
“OF COURSE HE DOES!”
why did i say that?
well…
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NO SMOKE, SLEEPING IN THE SAME BED, AND SOMEONE ENDS UP DEAD
some of the situations ya’ll find yourself in…
sometimes it’s a mixture of “duh” or super predatory behavior.
so we meet straight males at bars,
have them come over to our cribs,
and sexually assault them while they are sleeping in our beds?
some live to tell the tale; others don’t.
the victim in this story learned the hard way but the story is off…
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HE LIKED HER, THEY HATED IT, SO THEY HAD TO BEAT HER UP IN THE PARK
jealousy is like madness.
it makes anyone afflicted crazy.
if you have something special that someone else doesn’t,
you are in for a world of torment.
your reputation will be ruined and you may get beat up.
two she-hyenas were afflicted over their alleged friend,
maya tremillo,
who is pictured above.
as the story usually goes,
it was over a boy and well per daily mail…
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