My Little Phony: The Foxy Tribulations of Trust

trust.
something so hard to attain,
but so easy to break.
i can say that i use to be a very trusting fox.
i’m very “bright eyed and bushy tailed”.
always wanting to see the best in everyone.
worst,
putting those before me.
well…

that has all since backfired in my face.
for the last year or two,
i have been shown that many around me couldn’t be trusted.
they didn’t share the same ideas that i do.
so i got hurt.
a lot.

wolves that played with my attraction to them
a ceo wolf who is worth millions
a job that picked everyone over my loyalty
randoms who played “friend” and i haven’t heard from them since

i remember this she-hyena told me:

“you’re very nurturing and caring.”

..and proceeded to use that against me.

so i’m at a place where my bright eyes are dimmed.
my bushy tail is,
well it’s still bushy and thick due to coconut oil,
but it doesn’t raise for “used car salesman”.
smooth talk and trying to sell me an emotional lemon.
i’ll always bring me to the table.
one of my problems is i can be too optimistic.
i can live in the fantasy rather than the reality.
the reality is no matter how good someone looks,
no matter how smooth their words flow,
they can’t be trusted until they prove themselves.
i’m all in for proving myself.
i’ve always had to prove myself so it comes natural.
most love to second guess me.
so the walls are up.

jobs
wolves
fwb

new friends
my fuckin’ iphone

i don’t want trash in my life.
i’ve had to do a lot of a clean up to get to this point.
i’m all cried out because of being hurt.
if someone doesn’t want to be in my life because of that,
they can go.
they’ll be the clue that i dodged a bullet or pick ax anyway.

lowkey: i’m not bitter.
i’m always excited to meet new folks,
 but i’m very cautious of what how much i share now.
is that wrong?

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

4 thoughts on “My Little Phony: The Foxy Tribulations of Trust

  1. To answer your question, No nothing wrong with that.

    Be it wolves, jobs, or people in general we need to start having that exit plan we talked about before on here. I have a feeling more genuine people are coming in your life .

  2. Man what is it about us Gemini men who has issues with TRUST? I thought it was just me. I dunno who to trust because I dunno who is being real or just trying to use me or take advantage of me. It just makes me stay home , don’t be social with people and just stay to myself. It just scares me that you cannot be vulnerable and be yourself without thinking they are out tot get you.

    1. Uhm, don’t take my comment too seriously as I don’t believe in astrology too much but… aren’t Gemini’s the ones that are not to be trusted? The whole twins, two faces thing. If we’re using astrology as the basis for trust issues, then how can Gemini’s expect trustworthiness if they’re not trustworthy? Or if no one knows what they’re thinking?

      Mind you, I could have the wrong idea, I don’t do research on astrology lol so correct me if I’m wrong, and don’t take it the wrong way, my question was strictly hypothetical and in light hearted spirit.

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