i love when someone leaves a comment and it opens my eye.
the third eye.
the almighty one that leads to my soul.
well dignified,
one of the foxhole best,
left this comment on the ( x all the gays want pussy now ) entry.
this is what he had to say…
ya know,
that comment made me think all day today.
when i thought about work wolf,
it is clear we have some kind of emotional connection.
he is claiming “straight” on his check box,
but he also has some kind of deeper connection with me.
he may only feel comfortable with that.
the gays who are open to vixens may also feel the same.
so it could be possible.
it maybe something that just “happens”.
something is unexplained.
even this comment from ycolette:
…was also pretty on point.
this is one topic that brings about a lot of discussion.
we are all pretty confusing and complicated,
but that’s what gives each of us levels.
some are a level 1 or 2.
others are deep as fuck.
i’ll definitely allow more talk about this.
keep it up with the intelligent comments foxhole!
Generally speaking many African Americans have been so indoctrinated by the church that it is hard for them to use critical thinking skills, because they have been so conditioned to accept what someone says about sexuality from a biblical standpoint that sadly they will never understand or try to understand what Dignified so eloquently stated.
Even as a gay man my damn self, I am so guilty of putting labels on people. I know personally many Black women who are absolute in their thinking that if a man has ever done anything with another man, he is gay for life and he can never come back from it. I have to laugh at that one being that when I was a teen, I messed around with a couple of dudes who are very hetero today, married with kids and never to my knowledge have ever dip in the man pool again. I am sure if many females were honest, they may have similar same sex experiences but it seems more hush hush among women even than men. I have to wonder what is so wrong with enjoying a penis as a man, that women find so vile an disgusting, but they enjoy penis. How many women have you heard say, I dont even want to think were his mouth have been, and trying to kiss on me, but they have sucked more “D” than the law can allow themselves.
I guess labels make people feel comfortable and provide explanation in their minds. Black men in particular go out of their way to define their manhood so hard that many come off as crazy. I see this in the barbershop all the time, it is like many men of color are so caught up in their straightness that they come off as suspect. These are the dudes I wish would read this comment and try to open their minds to this.
I have a old co-worker who probably slept with every man from here to the moon, but abruptly about 8 years ago decided to get married to a woman and the hell he caught from both str8 and gays was off the charts. He and the wife are still married and have even had a son. He sort of got away from all of his gay friends, another mutual friend told me, he did it to convince himself and his family but no matter why he did it, everybody still gives him the side eye and snickers when his name is brought up. We are a hard group of people as a race to convince LOL. I even seen a dude on Youtube this week wife try to explain his Gay 4 Pay past when he made some J/O videos for a gay website, it was no other men in the scene, but he caught hell, seems he is now a famous well known bodybuilder on social media. It would be nice if we caught up as a race of people regarding sexuality and stop being so damn mean and hurtful, but I realized a long time ago, you have to live your life regardless and have to drown out the noise of others, because somebody is going to always have something to say.
Hats off to Dignified, this young brother perspective is always right on time. If he was 10 years older, and I was 10 years younger, I might have to come and scoop him up and make him Bae. Just joking, dont tell your real Bae Dignified, I dont want him getting mad a old man is getting hot for you. LOL.
So much truth here Tajan! 100% Agreed!
and I WISH I had a bae LOL! but ty, and you are not an old man haha!
*DEAD* at the Wendy GIF… And thank you Dignified for being able to convey what so many of “US” are thinking but didn’t necessarily know how to articulate it in a way that others will understand… I spotted no lies in what you or Y Colette said!
One of plenty stigmas in life that makes it hard. People think once a man has been with another man, they’ll never have any interests in women. Like they’re tainted. If that little unspoken rule wasn’t there we’d probably have less closet cases.
I always wonder where stigma originates. I’ve read some funny conspiracy theories out there
Interesting how this particular phenomenon only appears to occur in one of the two possible directions (at least, publicly) …and why.
Dignified broke it all the way down in his comment on that post, I read all of it and was just blown away. I’ve always thought like this but could sometimes never get it to come across the way in that breakdown.
I wholeheartedly love what Dignified and YColette said, it completely opened my eyes. Jamari, besides yourself, you have some very intelligent people on this blog. I’ve been following your blog for years and learned so much from you and the frequent commenters. You guys never fail to amaze and enlighten me! Thank you guys for this insight đđœđ
Thanks for the shout out J! I hope it made sense! Yes, the “unexplained” aspect is what I was getting at! There’s a part of sexuality that just defies logic sometimes, so knowing yourself becomes even more important! The Kinsey scale that YC brought up is a good attempt at covering the inconsistencies! It kind of makes sense to me that way!
As it pertains to Work Wolf, the Kinsey scale and that theory of sexuality having deeper roots in the connection “may” help to understand him a little better, but idk, he’s confusing. It’s still safe to just assume he’s straight, but the connection you two have explains what I’m talking about. There’s this confusing grey area that makes little sense. There’s a like an awkward tension there. Work Wolf might be trying to figure this out himself, it’s hard to say because he hasn’t explicitly expressed this. Idk how you do it!
I support you living and learning though, life is the best lesson IMO! When the time is right, answers will be made clear. I truly believe that!
Oh Jamari I love this. This is exactly what I was trying to say but well constructed instead of thrown together like my comment. Love the people on this site.