Even in death,
a sexy mofo still lives on in our fantasies.
…but it’s positively eerie scrolling through the socials of the dearly departed.
it’s like a haunting stroll down their memory lane until you reach the abrupt end.
A Foxholer posed a rather profound question yesterday.
it was in regards to the late jay hefner and his OF content…
“I have a question for Jamari and the entire foxhole as it relates to this. Now we all know that Saiveon Hopkins aka Jay Hefner was a very popular up-and-coming pornstar, and we all know that porn in particular is a tool that helps you masturbate. My question is now that Jay Hefner is dead, what is the proper etiquette when it comes to his porn, are you supposed to keep it and continue to use it or are you supposed to delete it out of respect for the dead, even if you paid for it?”
i won’t even hold you but…
It has crossed my mind a time or two.
on one hand,
it feels weird to find pleasure in someone who’s crossed over to the other side,
yet in our other hand…
Does their content truly die with them?
i’ll admit,
i googled stumbled upon one of his videos yesterday and gave it a watch.
usually,
i’d feel horny off looking at him but this time…
I felt absolutely nothing.
i skimmed through and closed the tab.
it might be too soon tho.
maybe it’s different strokes for different hard-ons.
when a music artist dies,
we still listen to their music but…
Is it different when a sex worker dies?
lowkey: personally,
i think they should keep his content up to teach some of these males how to stroke.
he had one of the best stroke resumes and i feel like it needs to be studied.
I can’t do it. I can’t even do it with celebrity crushes who have passed away, most notably Kobe Bryant. I normally would create scenarios in my head to jack out to Kobe when he was alive but now it creeps me out to even consider doing it now as he is no longer with us.
I have noticed that I will be less likely to watch their videos knowing that they passed but I don’t feel that it is negative if somebody decides to continue watching/jerking to their content. I think the only way I would understand or feel grossed out by it is if somebody leaked said content that was not meant for anybody’s eyes to see except the deceased and the other person present. Outside of that I wouldn’t go out of my way to watch but also wouldn’t be mad if I saw a video and felt urges to jerk to it.
I just want to start and say, thank you Jamari for addressing this question/issue.
I think you are getting at the heart of it for me; lust changes the dynamic when it comes to this form of entertainment. I had posed the question because I was trying to figure out if I was being immature about the issue. I can watch “ The Golden Girls” and still laugh and appreciate it even though the entire cast has passed away, the same goes for shows like “ The Jeffersons”, I can listen to Micheal Jackson, Prince, Whitney Houston, or Tina Turner and still appreciate their music, although sometimes I do get sad that they are no longer with us.
When it comes to Porn and masturbation; I do think there is an element of lust, and I am leaning towards the idea that it is inappropriate to lust after someone who has died. I remember back in the day when Jovonnie was just hitting the scene, he was the finest thing walking, low-cut Cesar, tight body, he checked many boxes in the early 2010s. His scenes with City Boy were fire, but when City Boy died, I just couldn’t watch those scenes anymore.
I guess to quote the poet Thomas Gray “Where ignorance is bliss, tis folly to be wise”, meaning as long as you don’t know, then you’re fine, but if you find out someone has died then the moral obligation is on you.
I struggle with this…mainly with ole school Mr. Marcus
Joe Simmons, Flex-Deon Blake, Wood, Winston Love, Teyon Goffney, Theo Barone, Sledge Hammer, Ray Victory, Kamrun, L:awrence West, King B, Johnnie Keys, Junior Carioca, Gino Colbert, FM Bradley, Ivan Holmes, Hoody LaVaye, Hole Hunter, City Boy are a few of the porn stars who’ve passed away and many still watch their scenes to this day; many of those scenes sizzling hot!! I have quite a few of their videos in my vast collection.
I can’t do it. Feels morally wrong.
I think it’s a lovely way to remember them and honor their work,
Cuando se muere un cantante dejas de escuchar su música, cuando muere un pintor dejas de ver su pintura. Ahora sí muere un actor porno por qué tengo que dejar de ver su actuación si en vida lo hizo bien.
So I never really followed Jay’s work, but I used to follow Mack Daddy. I think he got killed in 2018-19. He was legit one of my favorites because of how legit hood he was. I haven’t watched a single video of his since. The respect for the dead has to trump all that sex work he did in life. Can you really appreciate the work he did after someone dies? Depends on the industry they worked in. I don’t think someone’s contributions to porn should be looked at or viewed after a performer passed. Just my two copper coins.
^i felt this tbh.
i dunno,
it’s very complex.
i think if folks chose to still watch his work,
it needs to be done privately.
I was just talking about this yesterday with a friend. Personally I can’t do it but my friend said she had no problem doing it.
^ did she say why she was okay?