Fifty Shades of Your Constructive Criticism

over the years,
i learned what the words “constructive” and “criticism” meant.
i use to be tough af,
but i have learned to dial that all the way back.
some hyenas tho…

they want to straight violate you and act like their saint paul in christ.
i don’t know about you…
but if you disrespect me while trying to give me advice,
you will never speak to me again.
i promise you that.
some gay hyenas have this nasty habit of hitting below the belt.
if you going through it,
they will legit drag you while trying to play the “Jesus”.
the fuck?
like we on some “housewife” reality show.
the way how my cold shoulder would be set up after that…

it kills me how we often forget what they once went through.
when shit was tough,
the lights was off,
no one was fuckin with us,
and we were 2 blocks away from suicide

Did we want someone like “us” to give advice at that low point in our lives?

if you said “yes”,
you know you are full of shit.

so when it comes to the words “constructive criticism”,
that means being able to give realistic advice to their situation.
“constructive” in offering solutions,
while “critiquing” where they may have went wrong.

take being an asshole out of it.

if you deem the situation as stupid,
then instead of shade,
you build the person up so see they’re better than what they’re going through.
no one wants to feel worse while they’re already feeling worst.
if that makes any sense.
it sounded good in my head.

finally,
if you can’t give constructive criticism right then just listen.
it helps knowing someone is just there.
by listening tho,
you should be able to drop a gem in their ear off what they’re saying.
unless you just dead inside,
you should be able to have some kind of empathy.
am i wrong?

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

11 thoughts on “Fifty Shades of Your Constructive Criticism

  1. This is why i don’t listen to anybody people will give you shitty advice or tell you how they really feel about you in their “advice.”

    1. ^THAT’S IT!!!!

      they wait til you are down to kick you.
      rj,
      you hit the nail on the head.
      if i see that happening,
      you won’t be speaking to me further.
      you can’t clap back with someone like that because they only speaking their dislike for you.
      it’s best to leave em.

  2. I think it varies from person to person, I can recieve constructive criticism it’s all about the delivery to me. Not so much of what you’re saying but how you’re saying it.

    1. This is actually a good point I can handle somebody saying “I do appreciate your work I don’t like how this looks and I’d love it if this was changed but I like the direction.” more so than “I hate it not going any further I just do.”

  3. No such thing as “constructive criticism”. People need to learn to embrace others. First of all, if someone wants to give me “constructive criticism”, I want to see if they can produce results on the same level or of higher quality. If they can’t, they don’t need to tell me anything. If you’re going to “construct”, show me, don’t tell me anything…

    Maya Angelou said When someone shows you who they are the first time, believe them.

    The Bible says…Judge a tree by the fruit it bears…

    How you gonna tell me my oranges don’t look right when you got a tree full of apples…

    Boi bye…

    But seriously, CC is a code word for shady and jaded views. An excuse to ridicule someone’s work to your level of understanding.

    Now if you can POLITELY pull me aside and show me B comes before C but I have to get through A first before I get to B…I’ll take your advice and learn from my errors…otherwise you got me F-U-C-K-E-D Up.

  4. Agreed Jamari! I really think some people should keep their “advice” to themselves, since they don’t know how to be constructive with that they’re saying. What happens A LOT is that they can have valid opinions, but they say it in a way that just isn’t helpful. These are the type of people who usually code it as: “listen, I’m not going to sugarcoat it” as if being any sort of constructive is sugarcoating. I only say that to people if I’m frustrated or if they want to hear my raw opinions. Sometimes we just have to learn that our “opinions” and “advice” don’t always matter as much as we think they do to other people, and learn what to say to help THAT person in THEIR situation, even if it slightly differs from what WE think. We’re not that important, nor are we better than others, regardless of the situation. If you’re going to be a friend, then be a friend. At least, that’s what I try to do.

    1. and I take issue with unsolicited opinions or advice from people who are not in a position to give me advice. If you’re not my boss, my parents, family, and certain friends, constructive criticism isn’t needed. I try to treat people with the same respect.

  5. Gay men are messy. I can’t be bothered sometimes. It’s like they try to come for you.
    Yeah call it constructive criticism if you want…that shyt is them being shady AF.

    I remember I met my best friend’s boyfriend for the first time and we met up with some friends of his. They were throwing little jabs at me, thinking I didn’t know any better. It finally got to the point where I had to tell them straight up, you have one more time to make sly comments about me before I hop across this table an put my foot all up in your ass. You don’t know me at all, and I don’t want to know your little candy apple asses either. I want you to understand that the fact that you are friends of my homeboy’s boyfriend is the only thing keeping me off your ass right now. Then the little bitches want to try and get loud, knowing damn well they didn’t want it. Pissed me off. LOL

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