you’ll be surprised about what we do to remove ourselves from reality.
many people use drugs and alcohol to suppress what’s really happening on the inside.
for many who are struggling with their sexuality,
we will drunk or high ourselves out of their minds.
i felt like it was the opposite for me when i was struggling within myself.
getting high actually made me more paranoid than anything else.
i felt like i was exposed to those around me,
but i could pick up on all the energy of males that were attracted to me.
colton underwood,
who appeared on the bachelor and recently ( x came out ),
claims he popped xanax to keep his gayess contained in his new documentary…

Colton Underwood admits he struggled with being gay so much that he used to abuse Xanax as a coping mechanism.

“I was suppressing my sexuality so hard that I was taking medication daily to deal with depression and anxiety, and that made me a paranoid freak,” the former “Bachelor,” 29, says in his new Netflix docuseries, “Coming Out Colton,” which premieres on Friday.

“I didn’t trust a whole lot of people, and I was trying to do anything and everything I could to protect a secret,” he recalls.

During an on-camera conversation with his longtime friend Kassidy, Underwood tearfully shares that he “hit rock bottom” one night when he “took a lot of Xanax” in the hope that he would not “wake up the next morning.”

i feel like this is the story for most of us who are struggling hard with sexuality.
honestly,
most males who are struggling don’t operate normally.
they usually but are not limited to:

Extreme paranoia
Do everything in their power to fit in with the straights
Go hardbody talking about males who are gay or fit the stereotype
Try to “fuck the gay outta themselves” with abnormally high pussy count
Date vixens with very masculine-looking features or actions
Doing things that make you think something is “off” with them

we usually do more damage and out ourselves tbh.
i hate to break it to some folks but folks are already gossiping because they’re moving off.

article cc: page six