i sat in wonderland with full disgust today.
it was before lunch so my appetite was gone.
in the climate we live in,
we are bound to feel “painfully black” in some way.
folks are not shy about their racism.
so i was telling my cousin hybrid about wonderland today.
we haven’t spoken in a while and he wanted a life update.
boy!
did i have a ton of shit to tell him!
i told him all that was going on in this temp job.
he didn’t want to believe what i was fonting.
no one does.
while i was pouring him a good cup,
he was in the background googling.
he sent me a few links to events the company held…
NOT
ONE
OUNCE
OF
DIVERSITY
everyone was either white,
asian,
white hispanic,
or “other”.
by other,
i mean something of a lighter shade.
all of the pictures was majority white.
it was very unsettling.
it showed that i was right as usual.
my foxy senses were on the nose.
as the day went on,
i couldn’t stop thinking about yesterday’s comments.
the entry was about how i was rejected from a job.
it lowkey depressed me as i played “predict the future”.
it’s a self destructive game i play when i start to panic.
as i was in the middle of my head about to explode:
“jamari,
i have an interview coming in in a few…”
the tall snow wolf leaned over the desk to remind me.
i can tell he doesn’t care for me.
he is just tolerating me.
“i know.
it’s on the calendar!”
her name was nancy and she looked it.
blonde with blue eyes.
so they were about 7 interviews so far.
4 were snow vixens.
the one who came in today is new and she makes 5.
2 vixens of color came in.
none of them were black.
both were indian.
the 4 snow vixens are on their second interviews.
2 blondes; 2 brunettes.
the 2 indians never came back.
the one who came in today joined the blondes.
she was “basic pretty” with a nice body.
they seem to like a blonde.
the two snow wolves cackle the loudest while interviewing them.
“nancy – any whiter and she’ll vacation in nantucket.
her dad, orson, owns a private equity firm for oil platform workers i bet”
my cousin hybrid joked,
but sadly it’s very serious.
it’s really disgusting how this is all going down.
they definitely don’t want any n*ggas working in wonderland.
lowkey: i heard that tech is insanely and allegedly racist.
they don’t really do diversity all like that,
and if they do,
it’s often a sell out.
We probably need to get together and make our own tech company that caters to not only Blacks but LGBT.
Tech and a lot of online startups can be racist. A couple of years ago I was fired from a position at an online startup. The reason was that I “didn’t fit in with the company culture.” I was one of a handful of Black people there and the others looked like the types that people refer to when white people say they have a Black friend. I wish that there were more companies that hired people who look like us but I feel like those would come with their own set of issues. I hope you find something better Jamari.
Long time reader but I’ve finally decided to become a commenter too.
^welcome brandito!!!
thank you for sharing your story!
i did a lot of research the other day and saw the same types of discussions everywhere.
we are not alone in our experience.
a degree won’t stop racism either.
i like this discussion because it helps us lean on each other.
again: thank you for sharing and welcome!
I had one guy who asked me about this a long time ago. Despite us not being equal terms most of the time, I told him that you don’t need a degree to be successful or anything…Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg should be a testament to that. Though I don’t see nothing initially wrong with wanting to pursue higher education, it certainly isn’t the “accomplishment” that folks claim it to be.
Smart people get the skills and I mean in varied skillset. Though I have a degree. My skill set goes far beyond that. I’ve built a portfolio of my skills & I can nab a job from someone with a degree because I have skill to start.
If you do go, try a two year first so you can be job ready when you get out.
Getting a job ain’t about a good degree, it’s about being knowing your stuff…in other places, sadly, your skin color plays a part but as someone said earlier, one door closes, two more open. And just cause you have a degree doesn’t guarantee you will get a job.
Be smart about about it though…don’t pile bills on bills just to get a flashy degree and still owe the government for the rest of your life.
Come u with a plan of action and weigh things out. Nothing is stopping you from doing whatever you want. You can do what you want. Be that go getter and take charge and let no one tell you other wise…you got it.
^i went for one semester and hated it.
hated.
it.
i think i failed like 3 classes.
i decided that was it for me.
my cousin hybrid went to school to build apps and is stuck doing something else.
Yeah, I know a few horror stories. I’m okay with school but I do think college is low-key scammy. You can often find out a lot of things online for free depending on what you want to do.
Hands on is the best.
Obviously, don’t use YouTube as a couch to say you are in a profession like medical or something but you get what I mean, lol. The amount of money required to go to school is laughable. In fact, I find it even more scammy that people charge you to give you knowledge, which technically should be free, but I do understand folks need to get paid for their services and earn a living.
Do not do anything you don’t love. Don’t let anyone tell you to go to school if you don’t want because you’re heart won’t be into it. Personally, I believe in getting paid to do what you love, not what you have to do to survive.
My debt isnt too high at all. It’s bout 10k.
One if my relatives though is at this high paying job..Nice car, doesn’t want for a thing but has a 60k + in student loans.
Now all these folks be talking about living grand but will be paying back to the system for most of their lives. I mean it’s not to big of a deal but you know.
You might can try to get a grants too. I know you can apply for grants for businesses and many things including going back to school..but since you don’t want to go back they have grants for other things as well.
Everyone’s path is different so only you know what’s best for you and your future. Also, don’t be afraid to freelance either. You can build a client list that way too if you are good at anything on the side.
There are a lot of resources for those that search and with all these apps they have out now. You can male money from anything.
I like to work for myself. This new job of mine is my placeholder until my own platform is ready. I like being my own boss..lol
I’ve been in the work world now for 35 years. Yup, white folks can be a beast. And some black ones are animals too. My advice to you Jamari. Get a better education — they can never take your skills away from you. Stop complaining so damned much about a bad job — get the skills, put out the resume, and move the fuck on. My Mama always said when one door closes two more open. Rise above being an administrative assistant in fucked up New York City — there is a whole wide world out there!
^oh God i hated school.
imagine college?
and all those student loans?
i’m so good on that.
i’d would rather take a writing class,
SEO,
or anything that can help me expand the foxhole successfully.
as of right now,
i’ll take a job since my passion lies somewhere else.
seen countless folks go to college,
get a degree,
and not in the fields they intended to use it.
thanks immanuel!
^and quick side bar…
if i decided to even pursue a higher education,
associates (2) or masters (5 to 7),
i’d still need a job to pay my bills.
not to mention the time i would need to find a job in the respective field.
so it will lead back to working in corporate and dealing with nonsense.
am i wrong?
Jamari you are just making excuses. I went to college, took out loans and worked two jobs at the same time to do it. You have to go for what you want in life. You have to invest in yourself. If you can only afford one course at a time do it! And as far as dealing with “corporate and some nonsense” wake up. Dealing with office politics and intrigue is a part of life. Life is not easy — get out of that fantasy. But guess what. Life may be hard but it’s amazing too. I love what I do and trust you learn how to overcome the bullshitters out there. Please don’t become like a lot of middle aged gay men I know who worked little administrative jobs and end up broke and jaded at 50. Yup, they wear the latest designer clothes (often straining against their beer bellies) but they don’t have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of. Don’t let the world pass you by. Get off the blog and giving all these IG models your time and attention and give YOURSELF some time and attention. 95 percent of blogs are a hobby — not a life. Most colleges have counselors that give you financial advice as well as job listings. God helps those that helps themselves. Trust — I’ve seen it too many times. You got my email. Folks are around who can help and advise you. Use them.
^no excuses.
not interested.
made it clear in my initial comment to you.
i’ll pursue another way but thank you for initial comment!
I don’t have any problems at my job and it’s pretty LGBT friendly but since I am an empath, I can spot the enemy real quick. Last week, I’ve had one instance where this white wolf came out of the blue and asked me did I touch a certain system and another white wolf was like, nah, he was just working on this way today.
That seem to not matter. He bypassed all the others and came at me. I knew the devil was in him as soon as he walked up and started talking nonsense and I just nodded and went on about my business. You not bout to steal my light sir. I’m out
The same white wolf, I act like he isn’t even there and he was just a watching me yesterday…and I saw him out of the corner of my eye and I was like…”Look at the devil. Up to mischief.” But I ain’t giving him the time or the day..😂
These fawkers don’t know I’m very clever and resourceful. I know my stuff & I come with the facts.
It ain’t just snow wolves either, the snow foxes are just as sneaky. I have a friend back in my hometown dealing a very prejudice one. I told one not to do add URLs and other stuff to links and all of them got quiet, because you know when they get quiet, it’s time to do a mass verification to see if this black person is smarter than we thought.. She then later sends states that I was correct and tries to make it seem like she knew all along but suddenly forgot. 😂
Not all white people are like that though. I socialize with a few to pass along some time at work.
Anyways, I go to work to make a check, not make friends. I ain’t got time for that. Some of the black ones are a beast too now. I have one black guy who is older and a department head. He be joking with folks and then come up bothering me asking why I do “keep up” a conversation with him. I just grin but he ain’t fooling me either…I already know what he about too.. But anyways
Aside from all this nonsense I’m chatting about, keep positive and don’t let them take your energy or clip your wings. You’re responsible for everything before you now so make it happen. If you ask for something and you dont receive it, you either don’t need it or wasn’t specific..and you may need to ask yourself what it is you really want..
You can get signs from anywhere at anytime but I ain’t bout to get into no super post on this. Take care and stay confident, regardless of who comes at you because once you step from within the illusion of the world, negative forces will come at you to test you. Just watch… Anytime you try to make a change for the positive, a test will pop right up (usually when you least expect it )to see how you respond…Post or Neg. 😁
Forgive these auto correct errors..They are a mess..Lord..lol
^i love this jammy.
i didn’t even notice the auto corrects because i was receiving the message.
thanks to all those who can be a shoulder…
New York is full of transplants now and a lot of them come here with their racist, discriminatory views and they don’t support diversity. Keep your eyes open Jamari because your presence is going to trigger a lot of them. People like that don’t like to be in the presence of polished black people, especially black men!
^ive noticed lyfe.
most came to ny because they saw a watered down version on tv.
they saw this satc fairytale and not the reality.
now they are coming here and trying to change shit around.
they don’t want ny to be gritty anymore.
they want it to be “their way or the highway”.
some of the snow wolves act so distant around me in wonderland.
it was way different in fashion and entertainment.
i mostly had a lot of black colleagues there.
in tech,
it’s a completely different ball game and they made it clear they don’t appreciate me in their space.
A lot of them are accustomed to a certain aesthetic when it comes to black people and then they get hit with a serious culture shock. New York has some of the most attractive, well dressed black people in the world, and they tend to feel inferior in our presence. Don’t try and make friends with these people and don’t trust them. Get your check and continue to look for something better. I’ve turned down three jobs this year because I did not like the vibe of the office during the interview process. Don’t worry something better will come along.
^the good news is they never allowed me to feel comfortable.
so i was constantly to myself.
they invited me somewhere and i turned it down.
i don’t like how they moving with these interviews,
so why would i want to party with them?
don’t get me wrong,
some are really nice,
but the snow wolves are sketch city.
THIS RIGHT HERE!!!!!^^
I work for one of the largest marketing and advertising conglomerates in the world with over 180k employees across 700 companies. Talk about diversity at the OpCo I’m working at (with 35k employees) there are only 3 Senior Directors that are a person of color including myself. But at the same time they “market” themselves as this diverse organization as long as the diversity makes them feel safe. How are going to have the Head of Latin America division be some white guy from England??? In fact the guy who heads up the Africa and Middle East division is from India…. I’m a Senior Director with over 35 years experience in Information Security and I’m introduced to clients as “the security guy”. Like I said before, they can love your work but will never give you a seat at the table.
This BS is so frustrating. The proverbial straw for me I interviewed for a Chief Security Officer position at a global media company here in New York. They hunted me down based on a recommendation from a friend. Had 4 interviews and aced everyone. Got to the last interview with the CIO and Legal Counsel of the company. Meeting lasted about 15 minutes. CLEARLY I would have messed up the “flow” on their website when looking at the pictures of the corporate executives.
I’m venting right now but it’s a painful reality in the world we live in. Can’t be too black without being threatening. At what point do you give up a part of yourself to be accepted????
@CT it’s really rough out here for black people. I know my worth and where I’m going. I also know the very things they would like for me to change about myself to make them more comfortable, will bring about my success.
^oh this is powerful.
that last statement shook me.
^and see!
this is exactly what i’m fonting about.
it’s very frustrating when trying to get taken seriously.
corporate america is no joke and i’m glad folks are sharing stories of the struggle.