i have written my own suicide note in my head in a few times.
not lately as i’ve been in a good place,
but i always said i’d update the foxhole before i did it.
i don’t want you in a “why doesn’t jamari post anymore?” clusterfuck.
that is my truth.
for those who suffer from depression,
mental suicide notes often come standard.
i’ve woken up ready to die and gone to sleep feeling the same.
say goodbye to tara condell.
she was a dietitian here in new hawk.
judging from her ig,
she traveled and appeared to live a pretty good life.
she hanged herself on wednesday.
but i was her suicide note that was so beautiful written…
as a writer,
i got chills reading that.
such beautiful wording to describe her thoughts.
you can tell she was at peace with her decision.
there was no calling to talk her out of it.
she just did it.
her note let us know she’s okay.
it was very bittersweet.
nothing anyone could have told her would have stopped the outcome.
when you’re living in pain,
no amount of lectures or “this is the beauty of life!” can change a mind.
we have been living in this world,
for all these years,
and nothing makes it any better.
going out there and getting in a relationship,
having all the sex you can muster up,
or buying something cute,
getting tons of followers on social media
those are just temporary highs that go down eventually.
the real issue is when you’re alone and forced to face “you”.
that’s when the depression and suicidal tendencies really strike.
regardless of how the living feel,
that vixen is out of her misery.
the way she listed all the good things of this city,
but it still didn’t make it enough for her to stick around.
i hope she’s finally to be at peace.
*if you’re feeling suicidal and need HELP:
instagram: tara condell