The Pipe Is Not Right (For The Girl’s Bathroom, That Is)

Screen Shot 2015-09-01 at 8.39.12 PMwell…
so everyone meet lila perry.
i’m trying not to even get into her “look”.
let me get on with this.
so lila is transgender.
lila has caused a scandal in her hometown with her decision.
she went to use the girl’s bathroom and all hell broke loose.
students at her school said:

FUCK THIS!

…and walked the fuck out to protest.
the st louis post dispatch has the entire article to share with the foxhole…

Screen Shot 2015-09-01 at 8.39.38 PM
In the middle of last school year, Lila Perry came out as transgender. Before that, she had been living as a gay male.

But that’s not who she really was. No longer was she going to pretend, Lila said.

So this year, she told teachers and administrators at Hillsboro High School, where she is a senior, that she would no longer be content to use a unisex faculty bathroom. She wanted to be treated like other female students, including access to bathrooms and locker rooms for girls.

Her decision spread quickly through the small Jefferson County school district and, on Monday morning, students at Hillsboro High School walked out in protest. During the walkout, Lila was locked in the principal’s office. She said she and administrators worried about her safety.

The student walkout came on the heels of a School Board meeting Thursday that drew a large crowd — parents concerned that Lila is getting special rights at the expense of other students. Most of the students at Monday’s protest were opposed to accommodations for her. A smaller group gathered in support.

“The girls have rights, and they shouldn’t have to share a bathroom with a boy,” said Tammy Sorden, who has a son at Hillsboro High. It is fine to be different, she said, but it is not right to give Lila special treatment “while the girls just have to suck it up.”

Students and parents interviewed after the walkout were overwhelmingly in support of keeping Lila, 17, out of the school facilities for girls.

But the school’s gay-straight alliance and other supporters held a counterprotest to show that not everyone is in agreement. Some students on both sides left after school administrators broke up the protest. Supporters of Lila said they did not feel comfortable going back into the school.

Opponents said leaving school was a continuation of showing their position.

Lila said she has dropped out of her physical education class because there is little supervision and that makes her uncomfortable. And she rarely uses the bathroom now while at school. Still, Lila said, she should be able to use the facilities girls use.

“I wasn’t hurting anyone. I didn’t want to be in something gender-neutral,” she said, referring to the faculty bathroom administrators encouraged her to use. “I am a girl. I am not going to be pushed away to another bathroom.”

High school administrators referred a reporter to Superintendent Aaron D. Cornman. He would not comment about the issue, which has become the talk of the community since classes began in mid-August. He said he had to protect the privacy of students.

He did, however, hand a reporter a written statement. It said, in part, that the district “respects the rights of all students and appreciates the fact that the students we are educating are willing to stand on their belief system and to support their cause/beliefs through their expression of free speech.”

Students were allowed to protest through second- and third-hour classes and then were asked to return to class.

Cornman’s statement also says that the district accepts all students “no matter race, nationality/ethnicity, gender or sexual orientation. We will promote tolerance and acceptance of all students that attend our district while not tolerating bullying/harassing behaviors of any type in any form.”

Lila said the school administration has been very supportive and is working to make her feel welcome. They have allowed her to use the facilities used by girls and women.

Districts that refuse to allow students to use a bathroom for the gender with which they identify could run afoul of the U.S. Department of Education’s Office of Civil Rights, said Kelli Hopkins of the Missouri School Boards’ Association.

“The Office of Civil Rights has issued an opinion that says, if you do this, you have engaged in gender discrimination,” Hopkins said. “At the same time, there is no case law or statute in Missouri that says this is against the law.”

Schools found to have violated a student’s civil rights are at risk of losing some of their federal funding, Hopkins said.

Several people interviewed outside Hillsboro High on Monday argued that a student who still has male genitalia should not be allowed into a changing room with teenage girls.

“I’m not comfortable with it,” said Britney Heimos, a 2008 Hillsboro graduate who was at the school to pick up her brother. “There is nothing wrong with being different. But when you are different, there are sacrifices.”

Shortly after the protest, Jeff Childs, 47, and his son, Blayke, 21, both of Farmington, drove onto the high school parking lot with “Girls Rights Matter” painted on the sides and tailgate of the Ford pickup. When they were told by police to leave, they went to a Dollar General store, bought poster boards and markers and made signs that they held at the busy entrance to the high school.

“This needs to stop before it goes too far,” said Childs, who has a niece and a nephew who go to an elementary school in Hillsboro. “I’m not trying to be ignorant, but (the transgender student) is bringing it out in public for everybody else to deal with.”

Skyla Thompson, 16, refers to Lila as her best friend. She said Lila often stays at Skyla’s house overnight while Lila’s family tries to come to grips with their child identifying as transgender.

“She is such a good person. They are just judging her on the outside,” Skyla said of those who have been critical of Lila.

Lila wears a long brown wig, with bobby pins keeping the hair from her eyes. On Monday, her outfit included a short blue skirt and wedges.

Screen Shot 2015-09-01 at 8.39.22 PM“She is choosing her life to better herself, to better accept herself,” said friend Gianna Warfel, 16. “I don’t know what there is to discriminate about that. I really support the bravery she has.”

Hopkins, of the Missouri School Boards’ Association, said she is having to explain to school boards with more frequency how the federal government views treatment of transgender students.

“I got no calls on this five years ago,” she said. “I’ve gotten at least half a dozen recently.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVkhWUZjl70

lila really needs a better stylist.
ow!
don’t hit me!
okay i’ll be serious…
well my opinion on trans using female bathrooms is how they do in jail.
if you still got a peen,
you head over to the male prison.
i don’t understand why she has issues with the unisex bathroom?
tumblr_m5v70iKuTZ1qaf90uo7_r1_250i’m confused there.
seems like lila wanted to cause an issue where there wasn’t any.
maybe i just don’t understand because i’m not trans.
please don’t compare this to “being black”.

i also think people also need to realize that not everyone will be comfortable.
this is a tough topic tho.
i’m interested in seeing the foxhole’s commentary.
so i had to ask…

Should Lila be allowed to use the female bathroom?

pictures of lila credited: robert cohen
article taken: st louis post dispatch

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

51 thoughts on “The Pipe Is Not Right (For The Girl’s Bathroom, That Is)

  1. Jamari, you know you’re my boo and I just love you buuuttt you’re misgendering Lila. She identifies as female and in this article you are referring to her as the male pronoun. As to the question you asked, I personally believe she should use the unisex bathroom although I do understand where both sides are coming from. This is a very sensitive and touchy topic. I have a cousin MTF and a close friend who is FTM. So I do consider myseld pretty knowledgeable about the trans issues although I’m not an expert.

    1. @bfear you just making trouble. Jamari did refer to her as her, but she does have a penis. Just because you fee like something it doesn’t you are. Yes she is a “female”, but not a real one. I sorry, but it the truth.

      1. Actually @Lindo ,Jamari initially used the pronoun “he” ,I saw it.It was corrected we all make mistakes including myself.

  2. Hm, this would be easy to answer if she was post-op. Idk, The whole topic of being transgender is just very complex. Should she be able to use the girl’s bathroom? Honestly, I can’t say there’s a right answer to that and the answer would wildly swing depending on who you talk to, and their values.

    I’m conflicted with this one. I feel like she should be able to, but considering the sensitivity of high school, it may actually be better if she use the male bathroom. Identifiably she’s female, but physically she’s male still… i understand what she’s saying but she may have to take the L with this one. I wouldn’t even use the bathroom at school if I were her (even though she should be able to). Just too sensitive, i’d leave during lunch break and find a local pizza joint or something and just avoid the confusion altogether.

    Even if everyone convinces her to use the male bathroom at school, I wouldn’t consider that safe. I would be worried about getting my ass beat for wearing a wig in a men’s bathroom in a High school. I wouldn’t dare lol.

    I don’t think her desires or intentions are “wrong” per se, but she needs to think realistically. Even if she’s “right” technically, you’re still in a high school, and have to deal with HS kids’ mentalities. They’re not smart, or accepting, at all, so just take the L and find an alternative. Idk, maybe she can make a change, but that’s a lot of work just to piss. lol.

    I thought being black and gay was complicated.

    1. “but considering the sensitivity of high school, it may actually be better if she use the UNISEX bathroom.”
      mb.

  3. OK so she can use the unisex bathroom at school.That’s fine .What bathroom should she use when she goes to the mall or to a restaurant?We are dealing with this in Houston right now.We will be voting on the HERO ordinance.Houston Equal Rights Ordinance.One aspect of the ordinance is allowing transgender people to use the public restroom they identify with.For the people who oppose this equal rights ordinance ,”Do you believe Amiyah Scott,Laverne Cox,Janet Mock,Caitlyn, should be required to use the men’s restrooms since they are all biological males?”
    Personally I have no problem with a Trans woman using the ladies room,we are all in stalls.It’s not like she is going to see my privates.To me this is no different than straight men saying they don’t want gay men in the locker room.If it is OK for lesbians to go to the ladies room and possibly be looking at other females.What’s the difference in a Trans woman who may be attracted to woman using the ladies room.
    I have an issue with discrimination partly because of what my parents told me about Colored and White schools, restrooms,waiting rooms,hospitals,etc when they were growing up here in TX.

    1. At least you’re being honest. People want to say that law is just as much for minorities too just to get them to vote for it. Might be true but minorities have other federal laws and state laws to protect them so be real and say this is for the LBGT people.

      Race and sexual orientation are apples and oranges and I hate when people, especially black people compare the two struggles.

    2. ^so let me ask this…

      what if some pervert decides he wants to put on a wig,
      dress,
      and pretend to be trans just to use the women’s bathroom?
      possibly waiting to rape an unsuspecting victim.
      how is that handled?

      1. Google, sexual assaults in public restrooms,there are thousands of cases.A pervert doesn’t need to put on a wig to commit this heinous act.Boys,girls,women and men have been raped in restrooms.Maybe we shouldn’t allow Any Man in a public restroom since they are responsible for almost all sexual assaults in public restrooms.

  4. This is a very sensitive situation and before I go into my comment I wanna make this disclaimer to anyone who is transgendered please understand that not every hetrosexual person is against trans people but however sometimes in certain circumstances you have to draw a line somewhere in Lila’s case his/her case is clear cut and people have to right to be concerned about it she’s in her very first stage of transitioning from Male to Female and I don’t understand why she can’t understand why people are reacting to her decision to use the girls facilities she’s selfish in my opinion and as much as I am for human rights I co-sign this one sorry.

  5. Ugh this shit. They need to understand that everyone does not have to view them as the gender they want to be. Jamari you did not misgender anyone. HE is a male and always will be.

    1. And Homosexuals need to understand that everyone does not have to view them as normal.Homosexuals choose to be sexual deviants,they could change and be heterosexual if they wanted to.
      #sarcasm

      1. I definately dont think anyone has to view me as normal. Im perfectly fine with whatever someone thinks as long as they respect me and they dont have to agree with me or my life to do so.

      2. Are you also “fine”with people denying you housing,employment,healthcare because of your sexual orientation? Are you “fine” with people being jailed or murdered because of their sexual orientation being considered an abomination?Denying people equal rights is not” respecting “them whether it’s based on their race,gender identity,sexual orientation,religion,etc

        Later,I am going to bed

      3. Im glad you went to sleep because you are arguing the wrong points with me. Just because you dont consider some one who is male a female or agree with homosexuality does not automatically mean all that other stuff will be done. I said I dont care what yhe think as long as they respect me. Obviously all that you said would fall under some gorm of disrespect. They are not denying that trans equal rights. Nobody is saying trans cant use the bathroom or shouldnt have an adequate one. All the trans cares about is being treated just like a female, however he isn’t a female and nobody has to see him as such.

  6. I feel until she had legalized papers stating she is a female than she should complain other than that she should have used the unisex bathroom just for now. I do praise her for standing for what she wants its not easy at that age or sexual identity.

  7. He’s lucky they just walked out, at a black school they would’ve been trying to fight her and the staff would let them.

    The world has gone crazy. I can put on a wig and say I’m a woman and idiots would actually make an argument for me to go into the women’s restroom lol.

    So if I feel like I’m white, 6’5, with blonde hair I can put that on my license?

    I swear today’s issues will turn a liberal into a conservative.

  8. I think the school was accommodating to provide a unisex facility and that should be the bathroom/locker room “she” should use. I for one think that biological females should have the right to privacy from a biological male no matter how “she” identifies, when there are minors involved. We have laws on the books to protect children and high school students are still children/minors under the law no matter how Lila feels. School are obligated by law to protect children from any type of sexual abuse or harassment, no female should have to feel uncomfortable being in the presence of biological male when she is changing clothes are in other intimate situations. I am not totally convinced in her journey, this whole things smells like an attention stunt, and tomorrow she could wake up and want to be a boy again. What if other boys want to use the female bathroom or girls want to use the male bathrooms, there will be nothing no one could say if they allow this. Most youth do not have the maturity to deal with these types of situation no matter how advance children may be in this day and age. If this was the workplace with adults it would still be an issue for some but at least everyone involved is an adult and not a minor. Sorry Lila I say NO.

    1. See, I understand Lila’s campaign for being able to use the girl’s bathroom, but I think having and using the unisex bathroom in her case is the safest and smartest decision for her. I think it gets more complicated in the workplace or in “adult-world” but in high school, i’m not sure if fighting the politics for which bathroom to use is worth the effort whether she wins the case or loses it.

      It’s just a bathroom, it’s just high school, just do your business and go on about your business. Bide your time until you grow and wait for when it really matters to fight for it.

      Because of everything else you said tajan, I’m siding with you on this one, even though I admire her bravery for taking a stand, and want to be fair and understanding, i just don’t think this is the right battle to pick at THIS point in her life. Not yet. Mostly because of the maturity level of all those involved.

    2. As someone from the area: [S]he lives like a He more than a She. Attends church as a He. Attends school most days as a He. Not a tomboy girl, but as a MAN ([S]he IS 18, after all). Also, Lila has a girlfriend and is open about their male-female sexual relationship INSIDE the school setting. That and her insistence on wearing women’s thong panties on “girl days” so that her male genitalia was exposed in the girls’ locker room while changing for gym is what caused this reaction. The girls first requested the [s]he use the stalls provided for privacy or the gender neutral bathroom offered by the school. Lila’s reaction was to threaten a girl to “slit [her] throat with the heel of [her] stiletto.” The girls then went to the administration and was told it was out of their hands and Lila would be allowed to use the girls’ facilities. It was Lila who took this to the media. The whole thing stinks of attention mongering and entitlement.

      1. see this is the issue then.. that its not a full on lifestyle change. No wonder the girls feel uncomfortable in this situation..

  9. We hired the first transgender person in our city’s government in the early 2000s. The issue of which bathroom she would use was a topic we discussed with our female employees before she arrived. This subject was very sensitive and people had strong feelings, which is the reason it was important to have the discussion before the employee arrived. When our male-to-female transgender employee arrived, she used the female restroom without incident, and she had not undergone the surgery.

    Just a couple years ago, we enacted legislation that allows transgender individuals to get their birth certificates changed to the sex with which they identify, provided they have a health provider’s letter in support of their gender identification, even if they have not had the surgery. The great majority of transgender individuals cannot afford the very expensive surgery.

    A few years ago, we instituted an empowerment program with our employment services department which provides job readiness training to transgender individuals so they may learn how to function in the workplace. This is important because in most of the country transgender individuals are not hired, which is the reason those who actually identify as female, as opposed to those individuals who just dress up in drag for shows in gay clubs and gay pride parades and put back on male attire afterward, cannot get hired. As a result of our progressiveness, more and more transgender individuals are getting hired in jobs in our city.

    Sadly, many transgender individuals in the country are left with having to work on street corners as prostitutes because they cannot get hired in other jobs. This has had the unfortunate result in the very high HIV rates in this population. Many johns pay more for no condom use.

    It is unfortunate that many in the gay community are just as anti-transgender as those in the straight community. Many gay people are even more anti-bisexual than straight people are. And, most unfortunately, there are Black people who do not consider Black Lives Matter to include those of us in the Foxhole.

    I don’t know if the school took the time to prepare the student body before the student made the change. It is possible, the school did and parents got involved and influenced their children. I don’t know how it went down. We are poles apart in this country on various issues. Even though one can be LGBT and serve in the military and get married, in 29 states today, one can still be fired as well as denied housing simply for being LGBT. LGBT individuals still get beat up and murdered for simply being who they are.

    But, still we rise, and we must. By the way, The White House hired it’s first transgender staff member recently.

    1. Thank you
      I am constantly amazed by the transphobia in the gay community.I am equally saddened by the racism in the gay community.As well as homophobia in society,in general.Not understanding something is not an excuse to be hateful or disrespectful.

      1. Thank you both for your comments. Very well said. I agree.
        It’s one thing to not understand something, and its okay to have an opinion, but its another thing to treat someone “sub-human” just because you don’t have the capacity to understand someone.
        At the end of the day they’re still human and should be treated with respect.
        I missed the memo where gay/bi people were in a position to judge though, people say many of the same things about us that they do trans people. Ignorance is ignorance IMO idc who its coming from or why. It’s pointless to think otherwise.

    2. I work in employment services and the whole transgenders have to do sex work because they can’t get work excuse is TIRED TIRED TIRED!

      I’d rather sit in my underwear or basketball shorts but I put on a dress shirt, tie, and slacks that constrict me every damn day because I have to adhere to my company’s dress code and dress for the job I want!

      If they’re not willing to take that wig off and scrub off that 2 pounds of mac makeup and they’d rather do sex work that’s their problem, no one else’s.

      Today equal treatment seems to be mistaken for preferential treatment.

      As far as I know transgenders have never been enslaved or in interment camps, never been denied the right to vote, never been considered a fraction of a person. So what exactly is their struggle? We won’t let them go into the bathroom that is opposite of their genitalia?

      I work with people all damn day that refuse to do what it takes to get a real job whether it’s behavior modification, training, or dressing right.

      Not buying anything you’re selling.

    3. Lila is not the one playing nice here. And if I had a child going to this school I would start home schooling. Lila is free to be whomever she wants to be but not at the expense of the rights of others. Using a restroom is one of the most personal and private things one does. And, whether you are male or female you should have that right. In Lila’s case she has not physically transitioned to a female. She still has male genitalia and will always have male genes. Physically she can change her genitalia but cannot change her genes. In this respect she will never be a woman. When she gets treated at a hospital they will need to know because male and females get treated differently, get different meds, etc. As part of being a woman she should exercise her female side a bit more (not the bitchy side) and show compassion and understanding and work with her classmates to adjust to this new progressive theology. By offering Lila a safe option the school has fulfilled its obligation to this student. She should understand and accept that she is different, will always be difference and she is actually the one being the bully. Get over yourself and use the Unisex bathroom until you are no longer physically a male.

  10. @jay,do you realize brain scans show there are differences in the brains of transgender people and non transgender people.This is not a whim,these people’s brains do not match up with their assigned gender.
    This is a related topic,I just learned a former classmate of mine has an intersex child.The baby is about 8 or 9 months old.The baby was born with a penis and a vaginal opening,one testicle and an ovary.The parents learned the baby was intersex during an ultrasound.At some point the baby will indicate which gender they identify with and then the parents will decide whether to use surgery to correct this mistake or defect.Transgender people were born with a defect ,where their body doesn’t match their brain(gender identity).
    I realize it is difficult to wrap your head around it.There are three year old trans kids who have attempted to sever their penises because they are girls (in their brains.)

    It baffles me when people say” they don’t agree” with the way someone was born.”I don’t agree with homosexuality”WTF does that mean? Would you say you don’t agree with that intersex baby having surgery to match their gender identity with their body?What is the difference in a transgender person having gender reassignment surgery?

    1. Different cases. Someone born with combination of both sexes genitalia is completely different from Tyler Perry in Madea drag insisting I refer to him as a woman because that’s what he decided he identifies as.

      I’m very intelligent so it’s not hard for me to wrap my head around it. I’m just not entertaining it.

      Can you wrap around your head around human beings changing their gender?!

      Someone that was born one gender can decide “I don’t like this” and drop some money and attempt to change what they were brought into this world as.

      Never will be natural to me. I’m sorry. My sensibilities will never allow me to play into what I perceive as someone’s delusions.

      I don’t associate with any so it’s doesn’t matter anyway.

      1. Can I wrap my head around people changing their gender? At the core, the idea isn’t about “changing” gender, it’s about “matching” gender. I think that’s where many people disagree on the matter. Those who are trans don’t decide how they feel about it, as much as gay people have the “decision” to be gay. At least, that’s the argument. No, gay and trans aren’t the same thing, but in this regard, they are actually similar.
        Is homosexuality “natural”? Eh, idk, or care about the distinctions of naturalness, but it exists, and it’s not something that can be manipulated, so that’s natural enough for me.
        My opinion is similar with trans people. I don’t know everything about them, but I don’t need to. I believe that if this phenomenon was just “oh I want to wear wigs, make up, and play dress up JUST because I like it” just for funsies, the whole idea of transgender would be dismissed, and perhaps I would agree with you. It’s quite a bit deeper than that in my opinion, and from what I’ve seen. Should they get the same treatment as the gender they identify as? In a perfect world, probably, but I wouldn’t see the harm in making special accommodations for them specifically as they ARE a demographic, not just a bunch of random dudes in wigs demanding they get called women JUST because that’s what they want, since they’re wearing lipstick. On the flip side I don’t think it’s realistic for them to expect the same treatment as their born-identified counterparts. They are trans, there is no way around it, and shouldn’t be asking for the same treatment per se, but for understanding, is my take on it.

        What you’re describing sounds more like the stereotype to me. The “fems” in the gay community, the “hootrats” or “ratchets” in the black community. You described their version of ratchets as their norm. Maybe it is the norm, idk, but it doesnt define that demographic.

        eh, I’m not trying to convince you to change your stance on it either, its not my fight, just my take on this.

    2. Do youk know that none of those studies are concrete and solidified. The only thing that i dont agree with is that the person is now the opposite sex. Can you understand that? There are plenty who claim to be trans and are only doing so to fuck a so called straight guy. Im not saying every trans is doing that nor am i discounting that some may legitimately feel that way. That does not mean that you are now the opposite sex simply because you believe you are. Im not male because i think i am, i simply am. Also dont bring up being intersexed because that is an entirely different issue.

      1. It is not a different issue when it comes to people who oppose “genital mutilation” or altering one’s genitals.It is not a different issue for people who say God doesn’t mistakes so don’t alter how you were created.If it is acceptable to close that baby’s vaginal opening or to remove that baby’s testicle than that is no different than gender reassignment surgery.

        I will say I am stunned that you are bothered by some person who pretends to be trans so they can have sex with some straight guy.Really? Thousands of transgender people are attempting suicide,thousands are homeless yet this is what you are bothered by.Every trans woman I know refer to themselves as a Trans woman or a T girl.Thousands of men put up ads to have sex with TG,CD, so most of the men who are sleeping with these people are well aware of what they are doing.They have that fetish so what’s the problem with that if they are consenting adults.

        Lastly I have never said a Trans woman is the opposite sex that’s why I call them Trans,they are biological males who identify with the opposite gender.Your gender and your sex are the same ,be grateful.

    3. Oh im am well aware of the men who actively seek trans people. Im not bothered by it I brought that up to inform you that many of them are not truly believing they were born the wrong gender. I dont want anyone to feel the need to hurt themselves and I believe they should have all of the same rights as anyone else, that does not mean they get to change everything to fit their feelings. Idk what delusional world you live in but trans people want to be viewed just the same as the biological members of the gender they are trying to be.

      Being intersexed is different because that person is biologically born with whatever variation of both sexes. They simply are what they are. Trans people simply believe they are the opposite sex. Intersex people correct an actual birth defect. Being born biologically female or male is not a birth defect and to believe that shows a level of delusion.

      My gender and sex are the same and so is theirs. The only difference is that for whatever reason they believe their is a disconnect. If there is any defect it is mental not biological. You can think you are whatever it will not change reality. People need to stop enabling peoples delusions.

  11. Don’t understand the transgendered life, not even close, but no way am I gonna judge or set out to demean their existence given the way I am. Just off the fact that we are how we are shows the human mind is complex as hell. If I could choose no way in hell I’d be in this life, but it’s just something I can’t help and its the prolly the same for them. Can’t even come close to imagining how hard it must be living their life.

  12. Something else too do the FTM ones ever have to deal w shit like this? Or is it the same way that lesbians are by and large given a pass from any ridicule

    1. A trans man wrote an article about all the advantages of living as a Trans man.I think it was called the 25 examples of male privilege.I remember one thing he mentioned is that he earned more money after he transitioned.He went from living as a lesbian female to a white straight male.

      Obviously it’s easier to be a Trans man just like it’s easier for a little girl to be a tomboy than a little boy to be a “sissy”.It’s acceptable for me to wear a suit to work,where it is not acceptable for you to wear a dress to work.Many straight men are turned on by lesbian couple if they are feminine but many people are repulsed by gay male couple.That’s why I want to see Milan Christopher and Miles on LHHH.I have seen some clips on their IGs of scenes of them in bed,kissing each other,Milan discussing wanting to get married,have kids.I think it’s important to see Black Gay Male couples.So I will tape the show and fast forward to their scenes.I know a lot of reality tv is fake but I still think visibility is important.

  13. She cant just “get it cut off”

    Transitioning from a male to a female is incredibly complicated and involves years of hormone therapy and psychological counseling before you are even eligible to be considered for the surgery. You can’t just walk into a doctor’s office and say “please cut off my penis”

    One of the reasons she doesn’t look very feminine is because she likely isn’t on hormone therapy (it sounds like her parents do not support her and she would likely need them to get access to the right doctors and medication).

    She is living as a female. She is dressing as a female. This isn’t some “ploy” to see a highschool girl in her underwear (gimme a break! the internet exists people! if someone wants to see a naked person, we just google it)
    This is a small hick town with small hick values and the people are just uncomfortable and bigoted. Period.

    And I know you said to avoid the black comparison but really – if this was during segregation and there were black washrooms and white washrooms and this girl was biracial she would be asked to use the “colored” washroom even if she appeared white. It’s the same thing. No one has the right to say “gee you look about 40% female so no girl’s washroom for you!”. It’s not like a changing room is a sexualized place – and if you make it one, that’s your issue, not hers. Normalizing her and getting everyone used to the fact that she is a girl is exactly the right thing to do. Separating her is just highlighting the idea that she is different and will encourage people to treat her differently.

    1. Oh you are so wrong comparing it to being black or bi racial. Blacks were subjected to not just having seperate facilities but inadequate facilities. You cant say people have to accept him as a girl the absolutely do not. They dont have the right to disrespect that person though. Its nothing wrong with seeing someone ad different as long ad you can respect that. It appears the trans agendas are purley self centered and are only interested in their feelings and could careless about others.

  14. She is the one that is transgendered. The school went out of their way to make provisions for her as it was and she wasn’t happy, so she had to force everyone else to like it. I call that being selfish. And if I was a parent in that school and my daughter came home and told me she saw her penis, I would be suing “Lila”, the school, the State of Missouri and the Federal Government for allowing you to use that bathroom and/or locker room for sexual harassment.

  15. I think bathroom and locker room are very different things, or any space the schools uses for the teens to change.
    Pure bathrooms I think it should be legal for her to use the girl restroom, but she should be respectful and mindful still may make some uncomfortable. Asking for respect of discomfort or belief while giving none, that’s crap, so if true was being rather exposed with no regard to others, then her behavior is more the issue as an individual (and potentially harmful to future trabsstudents rather than helpful). A large part of my decision this way is because they don’t just live in high school-malls, theaters, etc. this will be the option, so need work towards acceptance and comfort, has to start somewhere.
    With changing rooms and showers, there should be unisex or similar arrangements made with pre-op. Post op, go for it, but pre-op being mindful of all, in current culter needs to be a line.

  16. I’m a liberal, and I support the rights of people with genuine body dysmorphic disorder to be recognised. I have my doubts about Lila, but will always give a troubled teen the benefit of the doubt.

    BUT not at the expense of young women’s right to feel secure and private in their designated space.

    Lila doesn’t feel comfortable changing with boys (which the school respects, so has provided her with an alternative facility, which I think is to be applauded). But when the girls don’t feel comfortable changing with someone who is unquestionably an anatomical boy, they’re labelled bigots and transphobes, and Lila creates a public outcry?

    I don’t think Lila gets it.

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