when is it really “the end”?
do you know?
really?
or do you try to hold on for dear life,
hoping it gets better?
as the end of the year approaches,
i’m starting to see just what needs to go…
job
work wolf
fake friends
social media
insecurities
need
fear
a ton of things that are giving me stress and strife.
a ton of things that either:
don’t suit me anymore
growing out of
been disrespecting the “good” that is in me.
its hard tho.
i admire those that can easily say “goodbye”.
they can walk away and not look back.
maybe i’m just emotionally weak?
or is it being lonely?
i have to hold on to those things as sort of a safety net,
but i’m constantly asking myself…
What have they done for me lately?
well i got the answer.
“confusion”.
Imagine the freedom and peace when you let it go. The reason we feel bad at times is because we are doing and allowing thins in our life that aren’t meant to be. Usually we know but let thoughts of “what if” in our heads..when we shouldnt worry about the “what if” but rather the what is. See things as they are not how we want
The job can go once you find a secure better one. You need support so hanging on while you can isn’t necessarily a bad thing but remaining ambitious is always a plus. Work Wolf could have been curbed a long time ago if only you had the mental strength. Fake friends, social media can go quickly. And as for fear, need & insecurities are a work in the progress. Keeping your head high is the motive.
Before you let Work Wolf go, go visit him at his apartment and just grab him by the collar of his shirt and pull him close to give him one big kiss then push him away quickly before he could say anything. For the final piece, you say goodbye and walk away……..
But then Work Wolf grabs you and pin you against the wall. You’re frightened because you are unsure of Work Wolf’s action, but he gives you a kiss. Your brain say “No, Jamari, NO!” but your heart say “YAAAAS!” He picks you up by the waist and you wrap your legs around him. He takes you the bedroom and you two fucked like wild beasts for hours.
^yeah see next entry lin.
it’s time to end this saga.
Same here, I’m so ready for the new year I’m praying I don’t have the same problems in 2016. I have put up with too much depression and crap from other people, NO MORE in the new year.
P.S. Don’t worry yourself so much, God has it worked out for you. I tell myself that everyday.
^i have a headache mikey.
like a bad one.