yuck

take a lick of my ice cream (and put it back on the shelf)

jackals really annoy me.
i know i’m supposed to ignore them,
but it’s hard when they are fuckin’ with our food.
i guess there is a new challenge out there.
jackals are going into supermarkets,
opening ice cream,
licking it,
and putting it back on the shelf.
so i saw this a few days ago on my twitter tl:

What kinda psychopathic behavior is this?! pic.twitter.com/T8AIdGpmuS

— Optimus Primal (@BlindDensetsu) June 29, 2019

…and went instantly insane.
( x they’re already hot on her ass )
now we got the copycats who have nothing else better to do…

Continue reading “take a lick of my ice cream (and put it back on the shelf)” →

please don’t ruin my hard-on with your filth

*the following is rated xxx.
viewer discretion is strongly advised.

so i’ve been noticing something lately.
it’s kind of “ew”,
but maybe it’s just me.
i don’t know.
so i go on “pornhub” when i need to release some tension.
i’ll browse until i find a scene that fits my fancy.
one day,
i literally got off to anime straight porn.
whole nother story.
#dontjudgeme
anyway,
this is what i’ve been noticing…

Continue reading “please don’t ruin my hard-on with your filth” →

Shaquille O’Neal Is Suffering From Severe Athlete’s Foot

i can never get over some of these baller wolves paws.
some of them need to come with warning labels.
shaquille o’neal showed his to the world on tv.
foxhole,
you have been warned…
Continue reading “Shaquille O’Neal Is Suffering From Severe Athlete’s Foot” →

Antoine Dodson Sends Pipe Pics First; Business Last?

antoine dodson maybe one of “us” again.
well before you giggle uncontrollably,
he was trying his best to be straight again.
you know was trying to impress us with the cub and the new boxing career.
well it seems he got caught up recently sending out his pipe pics.
i know.
i know.
i just ate a pizza.
one of my favorite vix-bi sent me this alleged story from mto…
Continue reading “Antoine Dodson Sends Pipe Pics First; Business Last?” →

What That Mouth (Won’t) Do

one thing that drives me crazy is a dirt mouth.
like,
have you ever met an attractive dude,
the outside was looking’ real good,
his pictures on instagram was on fleek,
but as soon as he opened his mouth,
it smelled like the garbage of a coroner’s office?
yeah.
no bueno x’s 110.
mouth hygiene is very important in your daily interactions.
you can smell really good with your scent,
but that can trumped if your breath smells like straight dookie.
you know its real bad when you gotta use the word “dookie”.
now not every day will our mouth be “so fresh; so clean”,
but these are tips to avoid violating someone’s nostrils…
Continue reading “What That Mouth (Won’t) Do” →

The Online Attention Whore Who Was Full of Shit

can i tell you what one of my fantasies is?
cum closer.
i don’t want everyone to hear.
it’s meeting one of the fine attention whores offline.
mmmhmm.
probably one of the instagram “herbanut” cult members,
with about 500+ likes on every picture,
with the muscles,
“you know you’ll let me smash” pictures,
and the “i’m 100% straight” disclaimers.
uh huh don’t front!
those are usually the best ones to smash!
well nothing could turn me off more…
than what one of my readers experienced meeting one of them recently…