i have a couple questions and there are not meant to be insulting.
okay ready?
here goes…
have you ever looked in the mirror and thought you were “ugly”?
have you looked in the mirror and one flaw meant the end of the world?
and have you ever compared yourself to other people?
its okay.
you don’t need to feel embarrassed.
i’m not going to judge you.
its just me and you.
trust a lot of us have felt that way once or twice in our lives.
many people no matter how:

attractive
how much money they have
getting good pussy/ass/pipe on the regular

…feel that way every single day.
well you may suffer from “body dysmorphic disorder” and not even realize it.
i’ll tell you what that is…
Continue reading “My Mirror Tells Me That I’m Ugly” →

i know my gym rats like to work out and all,
but simeon panda i’m not feelin ^.
it looks off or something.
i liked him when he was a old thick wolf like so…
Continue reading “Damn Daddy You So Big! You Cant Even Fit In The Car! Oooh!” →

“do 1,000 sit ups before breakfast.
2,000 before lunch,
and 10,000 before bedtime.”

“see these rock hard abs?
they came from doing sits on the holy grail and drinking cat blood right after.”

“you can get bouncing pecs too.
just make sure you lift your weight in a mini cooper and then wrestle a rabid raccoon right after.”

“i’m a herbalife life assistant. contact me today.”

is herbalife the male mary kay?
yeah so those are all instagram statuses.
you know i keed.
first it was models,
then it was twerking,
now its the BILF (body i’d like to f).

now we’re talking!
personal trainer wolves have started to flood instagram.
you can’t page hop without seeing compression shorts,
work out videos in the playground,
and sweat juice pecs.
listen i love my wolves with the muscular bodies.
i been known to worship a nice body,
while on my knees with spanish candles burning,
but has anyone noticed that everyone with muscle mass wants to whey in on a workout regiment?
it seems like these wolves who sucked as athletes have decided that training would be their life goal.
how fun is some meaty asshole
telling you that you ain’t shit because you don’t live in the gym?
how fun also that they won’t date anyone who isn’t working out either?
its like they have the personality of a dumbbell.
you notice a majority of these wolves have no one?
how can they have anyone really?
well besides “gymella” and that bitch is pretty much ran through.
hell the illusion of great work out like sex maybe just a fantasy as well.
i don’t mind the free work out tips,
but god forbid i try to hit them up about advice.
hell even personal training sessions…
i mean you are a “personal trainer” right?
i’m starting to think that personal training is all some of them have to offer.
with a gym now on every corner,
and a “steve to stephon” type dude with an instagram account,
i couldn’t help but wonder…

has personal training
become the new fall back career for swaggless men?

so i’ve been going to the gym.
gold star.
i have been on my gym flow,
almost every morning,
and i feel good and i feel energized.
i bought all kinds of healthy food to start the process.
i didn’t realize how expensive it was going to be,
but i  took everything you guys said to me seriously.
of course nothing stays perfect for long…

Continue reading “Jamari Fox Is A Dumbass. Yes, You Read Right.” →

yes.
i have broken.
i’m literally on the floor.
don’t step on me
i want to be honest with you guys.
i know i maybe judged.
i am prepared for it…

Continue reading “The Chain Reaction of Mental Anguish… and Slight Hunger Pain.” →

Nice.
Very nice actually.
Now be a good Wolf (?) and shave under your neck.