so today was an off day.
i don’t even know where the day went to be totally honest.
i know i cleaned up,
but the rest of it was a blur.
i felt weird.
like tense about something.
i don’t know what,
but it could do with thinking about some personal issues,
how im gonna pay some bills,
and trying to figure out things within my life that are bugging me.
i caught up on queen latifah’s talk show and she had a segment on an app called “stress check”.
you download it to your phone,
put your finger to your camera lens,
and it can check your stress level and give you an accurate reading.
well you know i like to try some new shit out.
this is what it told me just 10 minutes ago…
well it’s spot on about my mind being alert.
i knew something was up because i was craving something sweet.
anything with sugar.
i was also thirsty as hell for no reason.
my body and chest aches as well.
all these things seem to happen when im stressed out.
crazy part is…
im just sitting on my bed.
yeah this vacation can’t come soon enough.
i seriously need a break.
some dick would be nice as well,
but i definitely need to get away from here.
my mind needs to get right.
you all should check out the app because it is pretty amazing.
best part?
it’s free:
x click here to download it to your iphone
x click here to download it to your android
if you happen to download it,
lemme know your results.
x watch segment from the queen latifah show
Right now between work, school and having a major crush that is not reciprocated. I have had enough, the feeling of anxiety has me feeling out of it. So i am going into emergency mode aka mental vacation.
On work I am going to literally visualize a place i want to be, so tomorrow i will be in Japan so no matter what happens, all i will be seeing is mudda fu*king cherry blossoms and will not be entertaining anyone. If it comes to it i will have to start using leave i spend to many hours in that environment to be tortured.
School i just starting at the beginning not gonna try to cut down a tree with a butter knife makes no sense. I will read internalize and move forward try to complete my assignments.
As for the unrequited feelings, its no longer a crush since i told them about it and they just refuse to tell me whats up. As such i just giving my phone a rest, if i not in my chat apps then every notification i won’t be wondering is that him. Doesn’t mean i won’t answer messages but i not going out of my way to message anyone to help make them feel relevant.
I am phasing out the negativity all that shit helps cancer and heart disease and why should i be lining my self up for one of those, for things i don’t have to take on.
This reality is not working for me so I QUIT!
^kinky you know what?
take your time and if you need a mental vacation,
do so.
don’t let anything frustrate you to that point.
listen when im in my moods,
i shut down.
everything goes off,
i don’t answer calls/messages,
and i go away.
sometimes you need your “me” time.
Hold the hell up lol. Do not let no damn crush mess with your head, trust me on that. No one is worth it lol. I understand the school part.
I soooooooo feel you on al accounts on this, sounfs like my life. Best of luck yo you.
23%. Shit, last week that shit would have been 100%. I wrote 3 papers and had a quiz. My head was tingling and shit, I know y’all have experienced that, it is annoying af lol. I’m in relaxation mode this week tho.
Jamari you need to lay down instead of sitting up lol. That should help you chill a little. Lying down helps you to relax, trust me. I’m doing it right now.
^ill take your advice.
ive ignored all contact from everyone.
just had a warm detox bath while listening to kirk franklin.
ill blog from bed tonight.