you ever felt trapped?
like you wanted to do something,
react a certain way,
but you couldn’t?
you had to edit yourself and it pained you to do so.
it wasn’t the right place,
you were out numbered,
well this is how i feel this season of my life.
in a perfect world,
you would slap the fire out of someone.
there would be no repercussions.
well this isn’t a perfect world…
so i come to work and i’m not even settled yet,
when liar liar comes up to my desk.
she was being “nice” to me.
when a bitch is “nice”,
watch your back.
there is a sharp knife close by.
so she is talking to me about work stuff,
shit she already knows,
and then she starts goin in on everyone:
“i don’t know who our boss thinks she is.
you know i ignore her sometimes right?
i feel like she has gotten lazy.
she is giving me her work,
which is why i give you.
thats why everyone is complaining.
we got all this extra shit to do!”
“wow i never even noticed.”
“yeah and your old boss,
she do the same.
which is why you are here now.
you had to come here to help us.
now she sending me a ton of shit she wants done.
why is thing 2 even there?
sometimes i be looking at my computer with the stank face.”
i tried to keep a poker face.
i had to ask myself if this bitch is insane?
it was so fuckin’ weird.
i made sure to keep the conversation to a minimum.
i felt she was trying to set me up.
she wanted me to start throwing stones so she could use it against me.
something wasn’t right.
i felt it.
so the day went on and i got a call from my old boss.
liar liar wasn’t at her desk because she had running around to do.
she and our boss had to meet with my old boss and thing 2.
an important project ended up not being done so a deadline wasn’t met.
i did not even know about this particular project.
liar liar was telling them how she had to tell me to do it and i didn’t.
my old boss called me to tell me what they discussed.
clearly i would be the one to take the blame for HER FUCK UP.
“well jamari i’m going to send you this file to be done asap.
i want you to personally handle it.”
…like how does one just go and run my name,
along with everyone else,
through the dirt after smiling in my face this morning?
i got her.
so she came up to me to tell me what the meeting was about.
she left out the parts about what she said about me.
i had a question about a new procedure we have to implement.
after she went back to her desk,
i CC’d her,
my old boss,
and my new boss.
it was a confirm email of what we discussed.
thing 2 called me asap:
“you are getting it.
anytime she speaks to you about work,
she has thrown you under the bus a few times in front of managers.
today she did it too.
she got you out here looking crazy.
watch your back with her.”
i listened to everyone’s advice in the comments,
but i had to ask myself if this is what i have to deal with now?
i have to constantly make sure i protect myself.
i didn’t have to this before and now shit has changed.
bad part is that she seems to be loved.
a majority of people talk shit about her,
but they seem to like her.
they listen to her.
they love her sob stories.
eat up her baby’s pictures.
coddle her when she has her “moments”.
i feel like if sides were to be chosen,
they would pick hers.
hence why i had to go pray.
this lesson is very challenging indeed.
i wish this bitch would leave this job.
that maybe a perfect world.