mercury retrograde.
a time in life when things start to get confusing.
when mercury passes earth,
it slows down and spins backwards in retrograde.
in astrology,
mercury rules communication.
so during the three weeks this bs happens,
things in your life can get weird.
things won’t work,
they say not to start anything new,
and situations will get confusing.
my life has been absolutely confusing.
ever since may 18th,
and the last one earlier this year,
life has been one hell of a ride.
ima call it “chaos” because it was just that….

out of all the days i was on this ride,
today was the darkest.
it seemed the same for others i spoke to as well.
left was blah.
my home vixen was ready to give up.
a couple others didn’t even want to bothered.
it’s like i wanted to stop what i was doing and cry.
i tried to find the joy in my life and couldn’t.
thinking positive was out of the question.
i tried listening to abraham hicks and td jakes and the messages couldn’t get through.
my mind was going out of control.

like the retrograde,
it felt like i was going backwards.
i couldn’t stop thinking about mi,
work wolf,
and my job.
i asked myself:

“at what point did i let these things get out of control?”
“when did i go so far down the path that i got lost?”

and my favorite:

“am i fuckin’ doomed?”

maybe i’m being emotional.
maybe i’m being a bitch.
maybe i’m in the mind cluster fuck called the mercury retrograde.
its like i want to stop and start everything over from scratch.
mi.
work wolf.
the job.
my life.
i want to find that reset button and try again.
maybe since the mercury retrograde ends today (june 11),
it will do just that?
i hope.