two things can be true at the same time.
i don’t think many of us realize this,
especially in the black community.
we expect everyone to be as pretty and perfect as what we see on instagram.

you can have a very pretty life and be very sad too.
hell…

There are people who post their pretty pictures but literally waiting to die.

can you handle their truth?
or do you want them to always be pretty?
to entertain you because you are dying inside too?
you don’t come to this foxhole because i post pretty pictures,
pretending to be better than you…

You come here because I can be a mess and since 2009,
I’ve written in my truth.

i say what i need to font for whatever the situation calls for.
you have come to trust me because i give you who i am.
i’m glad that is who i am because i don’t need to play pretend.

Imagine me having a meltdown today and then coming back to font about”Christ Lord Almighty”.

nope!
today was:

i can have many off moments.
this is what has defined “inside jamari fox”.

That Work Wolf Saga literally was my biggest mess to date.
I didn’t even post about the other WW ass that followed.

for the last few weeks,
i tried to be a pretty picture but i was faking it.
holy shit,
i was an attentionisto?
i haven’t been feeling safe even within the familiar.
this morning,
i decided to let go and let have.
no drugs.
crime spree,
or rebellious onlyfans page.
i had a meltdown and that entry was the result.
i reached out to 3 people.
2 who are close to me and 1 foxholer.
they let me shed fur and be ugly.

The great thing about me is you get ME upfront.
Straight,
no chaser.

again,
this is why you come here.
i’m kind of a messy big deal.
thank you to all those who reached out after reading the entry.
i’m working on climbing out of this valley and finding my “safe” again.