You’re Gay Because Ya Mama Raised Ya.

tumblr_m3gkbvdfVJ1qfbzn0o1_500so an f-bi just sent me this “situation” earlier.
  i don’t think i rolled my eyes hard enough.
a quack named umar abdullah johnson thinks black men turn gay due to single parent households.
ones who are mainly raised by black women.
yeah.
the video associated with the story has been circulating from 2013.
i guess it’s back on the internet streets for whatever reason…

Dr. Abdullah Johnson, a certified psychologist, child therapist and founder of the National Movement to Save Black Boys,feels strongly about empowering the black community, especially young black men. Much is clear after one listens to his many impassioned speeches on the need for fathers and mothers to take an active role in their children’s lives, but is his analysis of why some are gay dangerously flawed?

At the 1:52 mark, the good doctor added that mothers “psychologically castrate” their sons then act shocked when they turn out gay. This statement suggests that being gay is a defect and that mothers are responsible for this shortcoming.

I admire the doctor’s spot-on critique of absentee fathers and barely-there mothers in the black community. I agree that we can do better and need to do better. I applaud him having the guts to not only speak truth to your own but offer solutions as well.

But ostracizing or branding a section of the black population as defects or equating being gay to being emasculated or raped is counterproductive, for he is dismissing large segments of the black community that can and does contribute positively.

One pastor even encouraged his congregation to ”beat away the gay” in their children. Pastor Sean Harris, head of the Berean Baptist Church in Fayetteville, N.C., since 2006, took to the pulpit to teach his flock how to get rid of “butch-like’ tendencies in their girls and girlishness in their boys.

“If your little son starts acting girlish when he’s 4 years old and instead of squashing that like a cockroach and saying man-up son, get that dress off you and get outside and dig a ditch cause that’s what boys do, you get out the camera and you start taking pictures of Johnny acting like a female… you upload it to YouTube and everybody laughs about it and next thing you know, this dude, this kid, is acting out childhood fantasies that should have been squashed,” said pastor Harris.

So Johnson is not the only one who believes homosexuality is learned or caused by parents and that it can be unlearned. Interestingly, they do not view being heterosexual the same way. No one says heterosexuality can by be switched on and off by prayer and therapy.

topiclist4i didn’t mean to laugh,
but it’s funny to me.

i grew up with both parents.
father was “be a man!” and all that jazz.
i liked watching sports and play video games.
i still ended up liking muscles and my back blown out.
i do like fashion and enjoy some good entertainment gossip tho.
even star fox (rip) had both his parents both active in his life.
i could name a couple more gays who did as well.
so is this logic flawed?
it maybe true with others so i can’t speak for everyone in the gay community.
i had to ask…

Does single mother households birth gay men?

…and is that why most are so feminine?

lowkey: this kinda reminds me of this k michelle song:

this song is a whole nother topic about men in general.

full article found: all voices

16 thoughts on “You’re Gay Because Ya Mama Raised Ya.

  1. Yea, it is flawed because I had a father in my life til I was thirteen. I still ended up liking like guys, and I am not feminine at all. I had girlfriends, I’m in to sports, fishing etc. When I reached middle school, that was when I started looking at guys in a different way. Yea, the females were looking good, but damn so were the dudes. I like men and I like women. Both genders are sexy as hell to me. I know my fellow bi dudes are feelin me on that.

  2. So why do women become Lesbians?

    I’ve heard this theory before and I thought it was partly true because of my own situation. I had a verbally and physically abusive father that felt like he was supposed to hit me hard because I was a boy and that I was supposed to just suck it up and be a man. He was also a lunatic. I’ve said many times that I don’t ever need nor want to see him again. Ever.

    Now I’m constantly searching for a man to replace that void in my life. That’s partly the reason why I wanna be a father myself. To give the love, affection, and caring to other children that I never got from my own dad. I don’t even call him dad because he doesn’t deserve that title.

    Many gays have said that they have a good relationship with their fathers tho so I know that theory is incorrect.

    1. ^yeah my father did the “hit hard” thing as well.
      hell he did it for everything.
      zen your comment made me sad.
      it explains tho.
      it seems like you are searching for something.
      i feel you will find it tho.
      you may need to let go of the past.

      1. That’s the one thing I can’t do. I’m still holding grudges from over ten years ago. It’s bad I know but I have a hard time letting go. Especially when I’m hurt by someone I liked/loved.

    2. Zen I so agree with what you said about wanting to be a dad. Since mine wasn’t around, I always dreamed of being that perfect family man and great father. Now that I’ve come to terms with my sexuality, I feel like I just wasn’t meant to have kids, but I wish I could still have that experience.

  3. From what I’ve read, Dr. Abdullah Johnson’s theories/beliefs have been discredited by scientific research. If he wants to say that, then he should be “doctor” enough to produce the scientific research that proves his theory/belief.

    If he does not or cannot produce the scientific research, then he’s likely just speaking from the hip and out of his own prejudice and morality. Dr. Johnson, put up or shut up!

    Now, black people in America need all other black people working hard in cooperation with each other to produce progress. All men, women, boys, girls, gays and straights need to be on hand and working for progress together. To the extent that he unfairly and without justification seeks to ostricize a ridicule and shame a portion of the black community, he’s working against that progress. Shame on him!

  4. To be honest, this is one of things that caused me to struggle with my sexuality the most. Because I was raised primarily by women, I always wondered if that is why I’m gay. I still wonder about it today. I had one main male influence in my young life and that was my Uncle. He passed away when I was 13 and it was like losing a father. I also had a stepfather (that wont shit) but I guess that counts too. Point is, the most important influences in my life have been women. Sometimes I feel that if I had a father that was there for me, maybe I would be straight. IDK. My father and I have been trying to work on a relationship for the past few years, but one of the things standing in the way of that is my anger with him that if he were around, maybe I would be straight. Then again, I look at a lot of people who had both parents and still turned out gay. I honestly don’t know. Maybe its a combination. But people need to be careful how they make these statements, because at the end of the day nobody knows for sure either way and everyone is different. I think there is a wide spectrum of sexuality and some are closer to one thing and some are closer to the other. Maybe some guys like me were in the middle and not having a father pushed it to the gay side. Anyway, at this point, I wouldn’t change a thing. I really feel that it may have just be in the master’s plan. I think being gay has formed some of the better parts of my personality and I’m glad to be me.

  5. That logic just does not make sense to me. My cousin had his father in his life and he is gay and he very lady like. My best friend had a step dad and now he trying to become a woman. I have both my parents and other male and female figures in my life and I still prefer males. I’m a hermaphrodite so if I only had females around I would be more lady like? Or males around I’ll be more manly child kill thy self for that logic. I have only seen a diffrence in how people act. I’m not sure of the staticstics says but my female friends that had males in their life they think and behave differently then the ones that only had females. That goes for the males too. I don’t know i just don’t know.

  6. this is flawed, i usually am attracted to athletes and hyper masculine men, and all of the guys i ever conversed with, whether as friends or sexually they had both parents in their life.in fact the first guy i ever had sex with ( i remember the date thats how good it was january 24 2008) he was the youngest of four children raised in a devout muslim household. i was 20 he was 35, he claimed i was the second guy he slept with. he basically touched my body in ways i never imagined. we slept with each other heavy for nine months consistently. like twice a week. and afterwards we remained in contact then i moved heavy over a certain time period and we lost contact but we reconnected n thanksgiving in 2012, and the chemistry was STILL there..and he boxes, plays basketball, football and served in the military. i’m 26 now and he’s in his 40’s but he’s ALL man and he showed me that a man can love another man and not be anything less than himself…people with these studies are all idiots with little to no medical training of the psychological mind of gay men…yet they proclaim these messages as if they’re certain…BYE what about the gay men in other cultures such as white men and etc….BLACK PEOPLE just get over it some people are straight, some people are BI and some men just DON’T LIKE PUSSY…GET OVER IT lol ctfu i can’t deal with black folks heavy in 2014….

  7. Dr. Johnson is trying to make sense of what seemingly doesn’t make sense for a lot of heterosexuals especially men. Many argue that there are so many beautiful women out there, why would a man choose to be with another man. They look at the reproductive aspect of it and fail to realize that being gay/bi doesn’t take away your reproductive ability it just makes it more of a challenge. With the help of modern medicine or a turkey baster, many gays can also reproduce IF they cannot do it naturally.

    I agree with all the other posters who say this his argument is flawed and need to be revisited. I would think that as psychologist would not promote shaming individuals because of the damage that it causes. There are enough negative things being said about single black mothers out there as it is and this is just one huge thing to add to the list.

    I support him on just about everything except this topic. I just wish that he would stick to his views on why so many black boys in particular are being pushed into special education. This is something that can be corrected. Being gay is not.

  8. My professor made us watch a video of him last Friday talking about the next genocide against black people coming up and how we may die soon.

    I didn’t even watch the video you posted on him cause I didn’t wanna get mad. Why do so many people hate us?

    1. Run, a video by him about “genocide against black people” sounds interesting. Please send me/post the URL for that so that I can view it. Thank you.

    2. So many people get distracted by this whole anti gay agenda. Gay is as natural as the birds and the trees. We’ve been around since the beginning of time. People need to let it go. Its a distraction from deeper lying issues in America at the moment.

      The comment from Run is interesting. A few of my friends and I have been talking about the things that have been happening to us lately. Something bad is coming and aware black folks are talking about it. These killings, attacks and blatant racist outbursts against US are a warning. The genocide against black folks is already here and its scary.

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