when we are cubs,
we usually have one main emotion that pushes us.
joy.
joy is what made us bright eyed and bushy tailed to be alive.
we see the world as one big adventure.
with the help of our parents,
we learn how to use joy to experience love.
as we grow however,
and shit happens throughout our lives,
we get introduced to the different emotions within us…

sadness
fear
anger
disgust

when that happens,
joy can slowly be pushed out of the picture.

i watched a movie that was recommended to me today.
it’s a cartoon movie by disney called “inside out”.

the concept was all of the different emotions working inside this little girl.
when joy and sadness got misplaced,
the other emotions took over and the outcome wasn’t good.
i realized that depression happens when joy is gone.
it made me think about my own situation.
i had to wonder…

When did I misplace my joy so my other emotions could control me?

as humans,
we need those other emotions to help balance us.
fear helps us to recognize and stay away from threats and danger.
disgust allows you to recognize something offensive and offensive.
anger makes us speak up and fight for what we believe in.
sadness is what makes us feel hurt,
but allows us to find compassion and empathy.
they aren’t negative emotions unless they rely on each other.
they all need to work alongside with joy for you to be balanced.

if not,
i’m learning that’s where depression stems.

it was a deep movie that has stuck with me.
who knew cartoon movies could provoke such thought?
as of late,
i’ve been seeking out to find my joy again.
i think it’s coming back to me since i’ve figuring myself out.
my memories of what made me happy are coming back,
but also these random bursts of good feelings and positive energy.
i’ve been thinking of the life i truly want and how i can achieve it.
i still feel the other emotions,
but sadness isn’t as big a driving force as it once was.
look ya’ll,
i’m growing.