I had to wonder:
Have you ever wondered if our regrets are just roadmaps leading us to where we need to be?

yesterday,
i had a heart-to-heart with karaoke about the ghosts of our past choices.
she’s doing well,
by the way.
anyhoo,
in therapy,
i’ve been wrestling with the regrets of what i tolerated back in the day.
people i should have cussed out or making better decisions.
then,
she dropped a bombshell of wisdom on me,
and i’m going to do my best to capture her words…

I forgot I met Damson Idris in person.
I met a lot of celebs that I forgot I did.

damson came to my last job during his snowfall arc and tbh,
he looks better in motion.
that is why he always looked better on screen than in pictures to me.
many of us suffer from that tbh.
we take a picture and look like:

Sidebar: sometimes,
you don’t work well on IG.
We get the full package in motion while many of IG look terrible in person.
I’d rather look better in motion.

for the first time,
i saw a pic of damson idris that made me feral.
he posted his new passport photo and…

I couldn’t help but wonder:
What makes us stay with people who abuse us?

is it money?
sex?
complacency?
it’s so wild to see pictures like the above with the late kim porter and diddy.
all those of us knew or heard bts of the abuse she (and others) allegedly faced.
while reading a transcript from kim porter’s alleged memior,
she described when diddy allegedly knocked her unconscious with a chair...

I have a low-key crush on NFL baller wolf,
Stefon Diggs.

he isn’t like the others i’ve crushed on but i think that’s why he’s so hot to me.
he’s regula but a sexy regula.
not only that,
he is very charismatic,
funny,
and has hella personality.

i tend to really like that in all my wolves.
unfortunately,
those traits that can have someone ruining your life and credit too.
i saw that he celebrated his signature shoe with ASICS in new yawk a few weeks ago.
congrats to him on that.
i couldn’t help but notice something tho…

jail.
prison.
the big house.
whatever you want to call it,
everyone has ideas,
fantasies,
and nightmares about what its like in there.

“What actually happens when you drop the soap?”
“Do straight males have sex with other males?”
“Do you get to pick your prison husband or does he pick you?”

i was on reddit and saw a thread that answered most questions.

i found his answers to be very interesting.
apparently,
it seems like jail is different for many people.
the following attentionisto has been showing us what jail life is like for him.
when i font you that…

Have you ever found yourself making a choice in the throes of desperation,
only to later realize it was the wrong one?
After realizing it was the wrong one,
you get desperate again to fix that wrong choice by making another wrong choice.
Welcome: The cycle.

we’ve all been there.
falling into toxic relationships,
taking soul-sucking jobs,
or striving to keep up with the joneses.
desperation.
it’s the puppet master pulling our strings into a dance of regret.
we settle for the first thing we see,
we compromise our desires,
and then we realize we picked wrong and stress to escape.
our closest try to warn us but we don’t listen.
i hear egg on your face does make for a good facial.

all of my life,
i’ve realized that i’ve been desperate and made dumb decisions.
it led me to having an epiphany about desperation,
a true “a-ha” moment…