f0xmail: The Issue of My “crushlovelustwhateveryouwannacallit”!

tumblr_moyd7cihg31qekrg7o1_1280 FOXMAIL


Let me start off by saying that 99.9% of the time, your posts are DEAD ON dude & I love every single one of them. You keep me coming back, each and every time! Keep it up homie. Now, on to a dude’s dilemma:

There’s this guy I’ve basically gone in & out of “crushlovelustwhateveryouwannacallit” with for the past 4 years. We were co-workers for three of those four years and nothing happened between us except for MY EX-BEST (girl) FRIEND ALMOST SLEEPING WITH HIM. (Yes, it affected our relationship that deep.)

From the aforementioned statement, you can tell he’s basically “straight”. But there was ALWAYS something there between us. Tension? Curiosity? IDK. He took me to the movies a few times (mind you, he only wanted him & I to go… mmmmhmmmm…), but nothing more than that. After him leaving my workplace last year, he got a new job in the same town. I see him all the time & I’m not sure what I feel. He gives me these high-school ass feelings, but I swore I was over this nigga. LIKE, WHAAA?! I tend to give him a sliiiiiight cold shoulder here & there just to prove to myself that I’m over him. (Dunno if it’s doing harm or good.) Everyone that I talk to about him tells me not to feel the way I feel because they think he’s “douche-ish” and that I can do WAY better, but I’m torn as a motherfucker! I still find him intriguing…

You like who you like sometimes, fuck what others think, right? (J, tell me I’m right. LMAO.) He still wants us to smoke a blunt together & shit, but I’m hesitant! I curve him on purpose! LOL. He can be fleeing sometimes (i.e. seem uninterested, returns texts hours later, etc.) and I know that has something to do with why I be on that #SWIRVlife. LOL. I’m part of your gold digger era, so I’m completely invested in my self-worth, and that goes hand in hand with my dating life. I know what I offer. I’m not easy. I value me, and I feel like my polarity to the issue is due to me considering my value before anything. I wanna stay true to me but don’t wanna be judgmental to this just because of the opinions of others, you know?

Tell me J, do I go on and try to make something work with the dude?

Or do I continue to wait for someone “worth my time”?

(P.S., Feel free to share this with the Foxhole if you’d like. I have no secrets. LMAO. Hey, maybe someone else feels the way I’m feeling…)


thank you for the love and checking me out!
i really appreciate it and i def appreciate you.
now lets get into this one:

the “crushlovelustwhateveryouwannacallit” situations we find ourselves in.
we meet perfect guys that we “thinkfeelwonderwhateveryouwanancallit”,
but a majority lead to one wonderful curve that always leads to:

after reading this f0xmail,
he doesn’t sound like he is a douche to me.
it sounds like he is a straight.
 nothing he has done has proved he is 110% gay or bi.
the curving him seems real OD and confusing to me.
 i get this feeling you are mad he smashed the homie and not you.
the homie being your friend who owns a pussy.
it’s still the straight and even curious wolves kryptonite.

i’m going to keep it real with you love,
because this is why you came to me,
but you should drop that attitude with him.
its doing more harm than good.
it could turn him completely off from being cool with you.
if he is doing things you don’t like,
then you need to check him on a friend tip.
i personally do the sarcastic smart ass thing.
try it!

my foxy senses is telling me he can tell you get down,
that you really like him through your actions,
but he isn’t interested in taking it to that level with you.
if he was interested,
he would have tried something when you both went to the movies.
how ironic i spoke about rejection in the last entry…
it also seems that he wants to curve the amount of time you spend together.

here is the thing: you only curve for a legit good reason.

i only start ignoring texts/calls/lives if you give me good reason.
he doesn’t sound like he did anything wrong to you.
if you let your own feelings and emotions get involved,
you will be out here looking all kinds of crazy.
it repels rather than attracts.
any wolf,
no matter if he is straight or gay,
likes the fox who is cool and just lets things go with the flow.
once you start doing what vixens do (attitudes and all that),
then you start turning them off even more.
so lets try something new on the 1st of november:

don’t expect anything from this wolf

tumblr_lj7h6p30Lc1qc5ybuif he wants to chill then chill.
he doesn’t hit you back after you text,
then you don’t hit him back.
if he never hits you back ever again in life,
then you throw up the duecez and keep it moving.
if he wants to fuck then get yourself clean and ready.
that simple.
if you haven’t got a solid confirm on his sexuality,
throw him in friend zone and keep it moving.
4 years is a long time for just “intrigue”.
biggest rule in the gold digga era:

the person who recognizes your value will show it.
everyone else is just bullshittin’.

they bullshitters always get the:


…and they are out of your life INSTANTLY.
“we ain’t got no time fo dat”.

i hope that helped and the universe provides you love and continuous light.

jamari fox

9 thoughts on “f0xmail: The Issue of My “crushlovelustwhateveryouwannacallit”!

  1. so wish I’d seen this when it was first posted. I feel like this might be (or might’ve been) all of us to some extent. But that advice is so on point. Sometimes our gaydar is clouded by the “wish factor” … and that’s just the truth

  2. well said j……sorry been silent creeping a while now, but this post was simply great. I fully endorse this message.

  3. J, I could just kick you in the neck dude! LMAO. Spot on. I swear homie… ON. As of today, won’t expect a thing. Promise.

    The Man, you’re right too. I’ve wanted just him for so long, and I don’t think I wanted to give up on what felt so right. Damn.

  4. Well damn. Bruh…you gotta chill man. The man is straight, and you have to let go of the emotions you have for him. Dude is probably really cool, and you probably missing out on having a good, solid friendship with him all because you are upset that he is not paying you the attention you are craving for. This is exactly how people get caught up.

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