one of the last things my mother told me on her deathbed was:

“make sure you and your sister don’t get separated.
i want you both together.”

…and i tried.
if it wasn’t jackals circling her money,
it was relatives coddling her because she was “light skin”.

Foxhole,
it was a challenge.

i often wonder what our lives would have been like if we moved to florida?
we were supposed to go live with our uncle,
but tbh,
his life crashed and burned a few years later.
as my sister got older,
her mental health got worse and worse.
unfortunately,
we don’t have the kind of relationship my mother wanted for us.
she hits me up ever so often with “i’m gonna do better” DMS.
i don’t answer because she isn’t gonna do better.

i’ve been seeing a lot of discourse online about rue,
who is played by zendaya on “euphoria“.

people saying lexi was mean.
people saying her mother should have tried harder.
people saying they wanted a happier ending for rue.

mmm.

until you’ve loved someone struggling with addiction,
or severe mental health issues…

would never have went to that bitch’s wedding.

…not after she played in my face after fucking my ex.
damn sure wouldn’t be helping improve her life either.

although she is vibe,
on season 3; episode 7 of “rain or shine” on “euphoria”,
maddy’s recent downfall was being too kind.

i felt that in my entire spirit.
by answering cassie’s DM to reconnect,
and going back to something that God removed her from,
maddy ended up losing A LOT.
i was expecting a whole revenge plot from maddy this season tbh.
she fell for the okey doke and cassie reminded her that she was still beneath her.

sometimes,
we need to tell that spirit of forgiveness and re-connection to…

sometimes after the breakup,
i know those “LooK YaLLz! ThIs Is mY MaNZ!” posts hit different.

i like megan thee stallion,
and i don’t understand all the unwarranted hate she gets,
but her relationship with klay thompson was a lesson in…

a wolf slid me his number yesterday.
i had spoken to him on the phone at work and he sounded cute.
like,
really cute.
usually,
that is not the case with some males on the phone.
anyway,
the part that got me was when he said…

the thing i don’t like about erika kirk is how fake she comes off to me.
nothing bugs me more than someone who chose fame,
but gets upset when folks start talking about em.
it gives a heavy “narc“.

it’s like when i have posted about some attentionistos in the past,
but they wanted all kinds of attention besides The Foxhole attention.
the same Foxhole that put them on the map btw but i disgress.
meaning,
they showed off but got upset when The Foxhole showed up.

when erika kirk said she wakes up “with a new headline about her everyday“…

i think a lot of people lost their spark around 2020.

for me,
it started the first week of 2020.
getting let go from my last job the way i did,
along with the whole “ww3” situation…