yesterday,
i was about to do something silly.

I was gonna send a mass text to everyone in my phone,
letting them know that if they voted for that man,
or they didn’t vote at all,
that we would not be speaking again.

in fantasy,
that felt good.

“Yeah,
Jamari,
you’re sticking it to em!”

in reality,
that does more damage and is actually very childish.
so after i sat with myself for a little bit,
i decided to…

can we normalize…

I had to wonder:
Have you ever noticed how sometimes,
the storms in our lives feel bigger and scarier than they actually turn out to be?

last week,
i found myself in a spiraling of worry.
i was crazy anxious about karaoke,
a few friends,
and some Foxholers living in tampa, florida.
all of them in the direct path of hurricane milton.
the panic only deepened after hearing a government official’s stern warning:

“Leave or y’all gonna die!”

while some friends and Foxholers were in full blown panic,
i called karaoke,
bracing myself for the worst.
to my surprise…

What happens when you realize you’ve been the superhero in everyone else’s story,
yet your own plot feels a little…
un-heroic?

i made a mistake.
a big one.
after days of feeling so low,
it hit me like a lightning bolt…

Have you ever felt at your wits end?

life suddenly became too much to handle,
you felt like you were on auto pilot,
and nothing was making you excited about life anymore.
i’ve been feeling like my energy had ghosted me.
i just felt tired about everything and everyone tbh.
it was like being a clown working overtime at the circus.
i was exhausted and still juggling it all because i balance two lives:

My IRL self
My Foxhole self

my entire being has rsvp’d “yes” to an emotional breakdown.
why aren’t we fontin’ more about burnout?
it’s like we’re conditioned for one thing:

Grind
Grind
Grind

…and then,
when the weekend rolls around:

Events
Errands
Everything but recharge

i’ve been battling burnout hard these past two years,
and while i’m no expert,
here’s what i’m learning as i try to figure it out…

Have you ever wondered why we all feel this pressure to overachieve at work,
even when we know it’s a trap?

this morning,
pose hit me with a question that stopped me in my tracks:

“Have you learned any other lessons from working in corporate?”

…and,
well,
the truth is…