I must say, I enjoyed this video.
I like TRUE friendships with strong bonds.
Something I have been searching for my entire life.
Anyway,
check the video for what they experienced.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-JuwZn50Nk]
Funny enough, some of those dudes were very masculine,
which I will admit threw me off.
Did you see that light Wolf “Troy” chillin’ on that couch at 4:21??????
Yummy.
I heard through the grapevine a few ballers Wolves who were incognegro at Sizzle.
Private VIP parties, huh?
I may have to put on my cloak and make some low key appearances next time.
š
Enjoy the weekend!
I found that planning for Sizzle Miami to be too much because of how its organized,Sizzle Miami is too expensive due to Miami’s economy I went into debt attending this year (2011).Sizzle Miami is too much if you go alone cause the atomosphere that is there created is overwhelming! After seeing this circuit party event I completely understand the DL lifestyle, The OUT lifestyle of being Gay or Bi is very complex and intricate,there is just too much work in being OUT. The closeted DL lifestyle fits into soicety much better as nature tells us that the camoflage protects the life of the animals from predators whereas the ones without it are left wide open for attack so having a Cover is not as bad as other Gay men make it out to be.
So ah…does anyone else notice how damn sexy Derrick L. Briggs is?
This post was interesting. I love Vain for speaking to the deeper message at hand!
Jamari ur next post should be about our talents that we possess and our hobbies n stuff. A get together get to know u thing…..like a what makes u so special or like how about a discussion where we all lresent ourselves as products and why the wolves or foxes should pick us. That should be interesting……
I think some of the reasons stated for not attending were rather valid. No one said anything offensive like “it’s for flames” or called it a straight straight fuck fest like I’ve seen in other discussions.
The general reason was it just wasn’t for us. I took OMG007 “too much” as in too much for him being that he likes to chill at smaller gatherings or at home.
No one made assumptions about the type of men that attend pride, but it seems a few are being made about the ones that don’t, which brings up a bigger issue of how gays can be just as judgmental of alternative lifestyles and ideas as heterosexual people.
I digress though..lol
EXACTLY!!!! that goes for gay and str8 events. like i said some drank/smoke a movie or a book and im coo
“Too much” means different things to different people i suppose cause it definitely isn’t used that way where i am.
didn’t read all the comments but I think I got the jist of things. I’ve never been to a pride event, gay club, or anything of that nature. It’s great for those who do, hell I’ll even say I’m jealous. It’s those people who do go that prob get to meet men freely, which in turn could lead to a long term relationship, which is something that I’d like. I would never judge those people, so they should never judge me. Just because I’m not out doesn’t mean I’m not happy. Shame on those who would look down on me because of that. And fuck anybody who feels the need to drag others out the closet. From perez hilton all the way down to ray ray n nem. If you are truly happy being out and free, why the hell do you feel the need to bother me? Misery loves company? Seems like it. What works for some doesn’t work for others. You’re queer you’re here and everyone is used to it, I’m here I’m at least semi queer but I like to keep it back there. Now if I change my mind in the future, that’s my right to do so. Until then what I do, who I do, and how I do it is my business. Would I feel the same if we lived in a dif society? Duh probably so, but hey that’s life. It’s not always peaches n cream…p.s…Its not just my sexuality that’s my business. My money remains on the DL as well. I dnt like my momma nor my church knwing how much I make. That’s between me n the devil, oops I mean uncle sam. I knw folks whose church be involved in they tax returns n wut not. No sir, not me. And it accounts for other things in my life. I grew up with a family full of gossipy ass women which led and still leads to lots of conflict, fightsm accusations and so on. That, not my sexuality nurtured me into a private person. It spans across the board with me, it’s not just about the gay thing…Everyone is different. Respect my situation and I’ll respect yours…
LMAO @ “I’m here, I’m at least semi-queer, but I like to keep it back there.”
LOL right it says alot and i can agree with shea about growing up in simi conflict i think thats one of the reasons im a private person
š …. ok. You took it too many other places.
**sigh**
Who wants some lemonade? Lord the local fruit stand man be doin it. Honey he be makin that damn lemonade. Shit lemme call my driver to fetch me some.
I appreciate the honesty MrSOMagical. I am in no way bashing anyone for not going or labeling them as self-hating. Pride is NOT for everyone. It’s more about certain beliefs themselves that plague our community. Often times, there’s this underlying notion that these events cater to particular, often “not okay”, type which isn’t true but is often illustrated when someone labels gay-focused events as “too much” (whether the individual means it that way or not). Its not so much focusing on the individual but this general “less than” perception is held not just by those on the outside, but those on the inside as well. I believe it’s a real problem.
I’m compelled to agree with ICeeDedPpl when he stated “Not being comfortable enough to go to a gay club, but have no problem trying to find a wolf or fox at a straight club is problematic.” There’s something deeper there that i feel needs to be explored when it comes to engaging in certain scenarios like that one.
Love the discussion guys! I was there…though it was short-lived. I think Sizzle is a positive reinforcing and empowering forum for multi-racial gay men. Despite the fact that other stuff goes on, the whole objective of Sizzle is to create an atmosphere of love, support, fun, entertainment, knowledge and camaraderie amongst gay men.
I actually was in Florida for Memorial Weekend but I only attended ONE Sizzle event…I did more straight events. But I have to agree with Vain…I could say that it is not my thing, or it is too extra for me (I am a homebody also, but not because I essentially want to be)…but its because I too am guilty of self-hatred…and not necessarily because I hate myself but the mere fact that I am a -deep breath- homosexual and I know that I can be cruel or unwelcoming of the more flamboyant types, etc. so if I’m ‘hating’ on them, then technically I am hating on myself.
Often I have to correct myself when encountering someone of that nature. I am by no means in the closet but I am more so masculine and discreet. My business is my business that is all. But because my environment has been extremely negative to same gender loving people, I, too, have indirectly adapted that frame of mind when it comes to homosexuals including myself.
It all boils down to us accepting each other as we wish for the general population to accept us. Nobody says that at Sizzle you have to interact with the ‘extra’ people (drags, flamboyant, etc.) because it does not happen. Most people move in circles at Sizzle, however, most people also respect each other for who they are. There are loads of masculine men walking around and plenty are holding the hands of the flamboyant queens because why, you and I chose to stay home, bashing ourselves…away from the ‘extra’! Make room for the UNDERSTUDY…
I loved this answer.
Vain, as usual, is provoking thought.
I am enjoying this.
why is everybody trying to over think this, im really a home body thats all and some of the things are jus a lil to much for me. like jay and i said goin to big events with lots of people is not our thing but not against going one day. i think there is a underlying question that somebody wants to bring up but is too scared
And that’s essentially the bottom line. Simply because its something you’ve always done doesn’t necessarily mean its going to yield the results you’re looking for. It’s tough to hear people discuss not wanting to attend events geared specifically for our community based on unfounded, preconceived notions. “Too much.” What is there too much of? If one has never been and experienced the myriad of things there are to experience, how can one say they know what goes on for sure? There are foxes and wolves and vixens of all types at these events who generally are more like you than you would know. You get meet people from all across the country doing things that would blow your mind. To me, a lot of this speaks to the negative thoughts and ideas about what homosexuality is and isn’t. The same sort of perceptions that are keeping us having to rely on covert, underground, in the shadows, ‘what’s the secret password?’ behavior to even SPEAK to each other.
I don’t think it’s even that serious. Different strokes for different folks.
I have been in close proximity of a gay event and I found the whole atmosphere to be…extra. Not my scene…gay or straight. I don’t go to the relays for the exact same reason.
I don’t think opting not to engage in those activities means there is something wrong with you, just as there is nothing wrong with people who do choose to go to events.
To say a population is “essentially alike” because they have the same sexual orientation is a dangerous assumption to me.
You cannot put me in a room with any guy who happens to be attracted to men and expect us to click. Sure there may be some common ground, as there will be with anyone else, regardless of race, religion, or sexual orientation.
I didn’t mean that simply because you’re the same orientation that you’re “essentially alike.” There are THOUSANDS of people at these events who represent the very board range of what it is to be black and same-gender loving. I do believe however that there is no one better who can understand what we go through as same-gender loving black people… than another same gender loving black person.
Anyone can opt in or out of attending a pride event obviously. I do feel there is this underlying self-hatred that exists within our community that is essentially a cancer. It perpetuates itself when we continue to allow our way of life to be defined by those on the outside and then go about labeling people as “less than” or “too much” because they don’t fit into the white hegemonic, hetero-normative idea of what it is to be “normal” that has been forced on us.
Plus, if you go into something with preconceived notions, you’ll ignore everything else and seek out anything to confirm and reinforce your thoughts and beliefs.
I for one am not scared to go to a gay club or Splash, Heat, or Sizzle whatever you call it.
I doubt if I run into anybody I care enough about.
The fact of the matter is those events attract certain type(s) and I’m not one of them. I don’t dress, dance, or enjoy the same music as those types. I’d rather go to a house party or gathering or a semi-crowded, racially-mixed, straight bar with people I know.
I don’t think it’s about being out or closeted. Plenty of out dudes steer clear of gay events.
As I said before, Sizzle is on my bucket list though. I’ll go once before I die…maybe.
I totally agree with jay here I can give too shits about if I’m seen or not. I’ve been to some gay and some str8 events and at almost all there was some sort of altercation. And I’m really not coo with a lot of people I don’t know
Makes sense.
It all depends on luck, your scent, and whatever you are doing at a straight club to pull a Wolf. You will probably just go there to see some sexy Wolf dry humpin’ some Vixen and get turned on, all while leaving there to go home and jack off to the memory of what you saw.
I, personally, like discreet events and I feel a lot of my Foxes and Wolves are the same. I met D/L Wolf at a low key get together. But, again, I am doing what I am comfortable with in my own world.
Everyone has a different path, luck, and scent of picking up Wolves.
You will never meet the wolf of your dreams at in home, rolling in the deep, in the closet of your mind. Just doesn’t happen like that. Cheap imitations maybe, but nothing real. This really isn’t about being in or out of the closet, it is about being comfortable in your own skin to the point where other people’s opinion weighs less than what you perceive about yourself.
Consider this: if the truth is sets you free, why continue to believe things that keep you in bondage?
Many wolves, foxes, and vixens alike are in emotionally abusive relationships with themselves and I wish they all would consider letting go things that are not working in their lives.
I feel it all has to do with confidence.
I know plenty of people who are not “out of the closet” and meeting people at school, work, the streets, thru friends… whatever… and Ive meet people out the closet who are single and unhappy.
We ALL (Wolves, Foxes, and Vixens) are struggling to meet someone and live happy drama free lives, but we need to confront what demons we may have that are creating a block in our lives. That block makes us become bitter and thru that bitterness, we accept what is wrong as right and cast out any other beliefs.
Look, you can be out of the closet or in the closet – WHO CARES. Do what makes you feel comfortable, but when you look in the mirror, you see yourself and you are confronted with your issues. When you are alone, you are alone with your thoughts. You can meet the Wolf of your dreams and sabotage the entire relationship just by insecurity. You can go to any pride event you want and meet a LaRon Landry or Devin Thomas clone and chase him away just by what you are speaking to yourself – because truth of the matter is, HE is hearing it too.
I see. It’s tough to hear that. Especially when its a group of people who essentially are just like them. And then they wonder why no one seems to be able to find them when they make an effort to not be visible?
So let me ask this….in defense to them…
I feel there is judgment in these comments because they aren’t comfortable going to gay pride events. Which wouldn’t be fair because they may not be ready for that yet. So I must ask (since we are all swimming upstream at this point), does it matter what social outlet you choose to partake in?
Depends on the reasons why you would or wouldn’t go to an event.
Not being comfortable enough to go to a gay club, but have no problem trying to find a wolf or fox at a straight club is problematic. Not really in to watching potential pussy perils with my straight dudes or having a dick disaster for myself. Although mixed events are fun.
Quality dudes are discreet, regardless of their level of masculinity or femininity (whatever that means individually) and you are bound to them anywhere, but you don’t have to guess about them at gay events, even though people still do.
AFTER SEEING THESE LAST FEW REPLIES, IVE DELETED EVERY FUCKIN THING IVE SAID. ITS NOT EVEN WORTH GOING THERE WHAT I REALLY HAVE TO SAY.
PACK IT UP BOYS!
**CAMERA CREW PACKS UP**
**MAN TAKES THE PODIUM AWAY**
**CATERERS PACK THE FOOD UP**
**LIMO ROLLS UP**
*I GET IN*
BYE!
VAIN YOU AND I NEED TO EXCHANGE SOME EMAILS!
**DRIVES AWAY**
Awww shoot!
Well the love is still here baby when you choose to return.
š
I went to a Pride in DC back in 2001 & it was overwhelming to saynthe least. Sizzle must be exponentially more over-the-top.
Never been to Sizzle, but it coincides w/Miami’s Urban Beach weekend, so there is a LOT of chocolate around – fox, wolf, vixen, etc. So you could still be incongnegro. DC Pride is a bit much – but people still make the trek.
I’m with both jay and Jamari I wana go but it’s a lil too much for me
Define: “too much.”
I’m not really in the scene like that and I guess it would be too much
What they mean is, they is in the closet honey and someone might see them out there and start ….too much means TOO VISIBLE.
No no I mean I don’t know if I can deal with alot of the flamboinant people. I’m really just a home body all I need is some drink/smoke and a good book. But I’ll go out every blue moon
Going to sizzle is definitely on my bucket list.
I’m a huge ADTV fan. Been watching it since it was just Derrik and Adam. But you’ve never been to a pride? There wolves EVERYWHERE!
Not really a big fan of OUT-ings.
I’m a low key type Fox.
Clarifying: Not saying they are bad,
It just isn’t my scene.
I’m sorry to hear that =(
It’ll change your life. They’re always fun.
i love ADTV! they are so cool.
i love ADTV! they are so cool.