jamari fox

I’m Just Not Fuckin’ Anyone Right Now. Is That Bad?

growth.
you know when you have grown because you look at things differently.
before you may have cursed someone out for violating your entire situation.
now you take a deep breath,
ignore,
and move on.
let them look stuck on stupid because you pay them dust.
what happens when you realize you outgrow people in your life?
even though you still have a connection to them?
well i have been talking to a friend i x mentioned on here recently,
but now i’m realizing i’m starting to be over it.
we had a conversation recently that went like this…

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Desperately Seeking Relevance?

….again?
i guess we can expect this every month.
anyway in my absence,
you guys were on it as usual.
had about 20 emails in my box about this.
even some mentions on twitter.
i watched the video that peanut leaked for the first time this morning.
and well…

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Bye Bye.

i have been in full mourning mode.
i haven’t gone anywhere.
seen anyone.
my computer and phone sat in my bedroom.
i officially moved onto my couch.
i only survived on cereal and water.
i’m sure i lost a gang of weight.
i don’t give a fuck.
my days consisted of watching the occasional movie and crying.
sometimes just lying there remembering…
i didn’t want to be bothered.
period.

i was about to erase the site too.
i was dead set on it.
i was about to pay everything dust.
i didn’t know how to write anymore.
i didn’t care about anything going on in the world.
nothing was making me happy.
even wolves.
yup,
i knew i was going through it.
so why keep doing this?
why try to make it happen anymore?
did people even care how i was feeling?
obviously i didn’t think that plan all the way through…

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Star Fox Is Now Amongst The Stars

i wrote the title last and literally busted out in a tears.
this was absolutely painful for me to write this morning.
my heart is broken.

he made me start this website.
he even helped me come up with the name.
he knew i loved athletes,
loved to write my feelings,
and had so much to say.
i was terrified to do it at first,
but without him pushing me to jump,
i wouldn’t have done this without him.
i’m glad i listened.
he always said to me:

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MEAT: (343)

now this…
this is the type of body you lick from head to toe.
slowly…
suckin’ on everything…
in between everything…
making sure your tongue doesn’t miss a spot...