the lonely heart follows you everywhere you go

many people have suggested i move to cali.
i’m not ready for the west coast yet.
i haven’t even visited so i don’t know if i’ll even like it.

Not only that,
I heard black males over there don’t like anything that isn’t exotical black,
or other.

someone i’m familiar with moved to cali from new yawk.
they were complaining about feeling alone since getting out there.
this is what they fonted…

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I Can’t Feel My Winky or Wipe My Own Ass Anymore

karaoke and i usually have the most intense conversations.
that is what i love.
good animals and good talk.
we get into a subject that would open up for an interesting debate today.
the topic was about the future and relationships.
of course.
she said something that made me stop what i was doing.
she said…
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I’d Rather Be Alone (In Bed)

bright-burning-camp-camping-favim-com-3586505jamari fox was empty today.
i was literally running on empty.
i had no urge to do anything.
my day started out with
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“Stuck and Left Naked With A Hard Penis” (Lamar Odom)

lamar-odomdamn i just come home from a long day’s work and see this news.
lamar odom fighting for his life after being found unconscious”.
i didn’t know it was like that with him.
check what tmz sports had to say…
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Not This Snow Storm didn’t want to go to work today…
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Dear God Can You Put A Penis In My Mouth So I Will Stop Gossiping. Amen!

Communication Conference

“mmm you know he suckin’ dick for happy meals right? yes chile.”

“um no one is a bottom anymore cause its all about being a vers boo boo. i been making a good hoe name for myself in these streets. step ya bussy game up. no one sucks a dick like me bay bah bayyyy bayyyy!!!”

“ooh didn’t you hear? he a escort on craigslist. can you imagine? craigslist? all the real hoes go on a4a boo. i’m just sayings in everything. shoots.”

“biiiiiitch guess who i just saw on myvidster getting his back. blown. out???!!! biiiiitttttch!!! he was supposed to be a top, but biiiiiiitch he a bottom!!!??? i mean biiiiiiiitch he never wanted to fuck me in any role, but i had to tell you biiiiitch because its a biiiitccchhh!!!”

now inside the church its:

“that is sister margret’s daughter. you know she has a past right? married men girl. mm hmm.”

“why didn’t sam put money in for offering? he is not giving to the lord. don’t he know hell?”

“i just had to pray for sister denise. mm mmm. she slept with 5 men in one weekend and is pregnant. don’t know who the father is. poor girl. she told me in confidence, but the lord told me to share.”

“the lord told me it was okay to sleep with the pastor. he came to me in prayer and said the reason he doesn’t look at his wife is because they are not happy. the lord told me to sit and spin on his penis three times, look to the left, and bark like a dog and i will be the new first lady.”

i started to wonder…

Same story; different cast?

Continue reading “Dear God Can You Put A Penis In My Mouth So I Will Stop Gossiping. Amen!”