WOLVES…
If you were talking to a dude online for a few weeks,
he had no pictures up and was really private,
but you decided to take one for the team and meet him one afternoon…
and he looked like this….
…what would you do with him on the first meet?
and do you think he would be feelin’ you?
Honesty gets you 10 points.
OMG! I know this dude! His name is (Nowyouknowdamnwellimnottellingthat) and he’s not feminine as guessed. This picture was actually just take a month ago at the Annual White Party in Atlanta.
Well yeah, that goes without saying. I was more so going a long the line of just walking up and introducing yourself politely would be pretty effective way to go. Icebreakers like the ones you exampled would be great and they WORK. Should foxes be the ones to do these sorts of things? Of course. But at the same time, if Im looking for someone to take the lead, I don’t know it someone who does not take the lead initially would be the best candidate? So far, they haven’t.
Right I’ve used them before but was mainly giving examples for wolves who know no other approach beyond staring and waiting for some type of telepathic response lol I’m actually now just sticking to the friends introducing me to friends approach. That way I’m not dealing with strangers and can do my background check before fully engaging haha too I think it takes away from the awkwardness and difficulty. I’ll keep you updated on how that goes.
Please do!
Lmao! I knew you would say that! lololol
That is effort, although minimal. I mean, he actually FOLLOWED THROUGH. That is a lot more than staring him down from across the room… and then… getting up and walking away because the other party didn’t read your mind and walk over to give you their name and contact information
He never emailed him though…
I guess dude was both enough to do that because he was graduating that semester anyway.
From now on I will be approaching foxes like the booty warrior. I’ll stare and then walk up to them and say “I like you and I want you. We can do this the easy way or the hard way. The choice is yours.” and smack them on the ass. Lmao I’m lying but I’ll do it once in another city..lol! I’ll be in ATL and NY before the end of the summer. Perfect time.
Sounds kinda hot actually hahahaha
When you approach, you’ll experience a lot more success than you think you would. (Although not in those words lol) If you were to approach and say Hi, my name is (insert name here) and i thought you were cute and wanted to know your name”… and then continue with the conversation… more often than not, you’ll get the number and he’ll probably end up being interested in you.
Plus guys that are super forward scare the shit out of me in public. Like “hello, discretion?” I’ll turn you down because I’ll believe you don’t have anything to lose. I do.
That is EXACTLY how it happens to me. When i chase, i end up doing all the work. I’m hittin’ him up, making all the effort, and from there i have to sit and wonder if this is something i can do for the long haul (Answer: No!). When a guy chases me, I’m actually a lot more mutual with it but for the most part he will continue to take the initiative.
What I’m really trying to figure out, and what i think is the basis of the conversation… If you are the one staring ME down, why must “I” approach “YOU”? We can go on and on about how we’re all men and yada yada but at the end of the day, if you see me, and you’re staring at me to try and get my attention… please follow through once the attention is gained.
^THIS.
Let the church say Amen.
foxes do u want the dude that doesnt have the confidence to come up and approach? i guess answer depends on what u want the energy flow to be in ur interaction..him taking the lead and you following…ur a fox that wants to approach..ok..cool..i have to admit that can be very sexy..you may want everything to be 50/50 energy/dominance wise thats cool too…the way it starts is often how it continues..most guys i have chased..the whole relationship was me chasing them in one way or another..and the guys that chased me from the outset never changed either…
Random Question:
This top I know was having a stare down contest in the computer lab with this short, thick, yellow dude he presumed to be a bottom. He simply wrote his email address on a piece of paper and somehow got it to dude. I don’t remember if he actually gave it to him or put it on his computer while he was away. Would that be enough effort? I mean it’s something…
I’d love for a guy to do that. Its well deserved by any fox that goes above and beyond for guys they date. If they’re anything like yours truly. Vain I wouldn’t recommend anyone use that approach until they are SURE the guy is actually gay/bi/curious. Could backfire. A simple “hey where’d you get your sneakers?” Or “who’s your tattoo artist?” <<< that line got me a handful of bicep in NYC even though he was straight 🙂 you can't go wrong with ice breakers like that bc they could take it as you just being friendly giving a compliment. If they are interested they will persue more convo.
With a chin like that…dude can get a hefty teabag session while play with that chest. He can get it…
No offense to the foxes, but just because you’re more of the beta type seeking a more alpha type does not mean you reserve the right to always be approached!
At the end of the day we’re all men, we all have some tenacity, and whoever wants it more is going to make it happen! Never been in that situation where I came across some dude I had to get to know. I’ve went above and beyond in a few situations to speak to females though.
I know for ME, if I’m seeing the same guy almost everyday in some way and we stare at each other all it would basically take is him verbally saying “What’s Up”. Simple. The door is open.
I remember what this good friend of mine told me when I first started messing with dudes and I refused to put in any effort because I felt that should be reserved for women.
“If you’re not chasing, you’re probably not in the game at all”
Now how many of you are eye fucking dudes from the sidelines? Ugly dudes have to be go getters in addition to having a thick skin for rejection. Ever notice you never see two really attractive dudes in relationships together, if either is attractive at all? I wonder why…(sarcastic voice)
Riiiiight “All it would basically take is HIM verbally saying ‘What’s Up’. Simple.”
My question is why can’t YOU say what’s up if its that “simple”? You’re absolutely right we’re all men and have tenacity so why put all the responsibility for the (let’s be real we’re talking in terms of top and bottom) bottom to do whatever to initiate the convo? Why won’t dudes go above and beyond like they do for females? We aren’t worth it? Maybe you should exclusively date females then.
I have done the approaching. On numerous occaisions. So happens I have a healthy appetite for STRAIGHT men so interest may not always be returned but all I do is figure out how to create conversation. (From this I have gained lots of straight male friends). I’m not gonna do that all the time though. Tops wanna be dominant in sex and relationships but allow someone else to dictate what you get and which ones you’re involved in cause you wanna be a lil boy and wait for whichever bottom is thirsty enough to approach.
Your friend was right. YOU are not in the game. All we’re asking for is mutual effort.
And if you can’t tell by the convo, there’s nothin BETA about this here =)
(All meant in love and good fun)
ok, foxandthecity is schoolin knowledge.
do we need a new “wolfinthecity” to also bring some heat to this discussion.
poor jay can’t handle us.
lol
Lmao you made the assumption that I was a complete top. My attraction to men isn’t dictated by whether I think they’re a top or bottom. Sexy is sexy to me. Honestly, I’ve found gay men who see things in term of sexual positions subscribe to rigid beliefs that usually play down their own manhood.
You said “Niggas are lazy” and “Eye fucking is not always from available men”. You think foxes are exempt from those that? Essentially both parties are doing the same thing (staring with no action) but wolves are the only lazy ones? The responsibility is solely theirs?
I have spoken to guys in a casual way in public places (grocery stores, school, etc.) they usually look like a deer in headlights. No offense but if you are too gay to even have a normal convo with another guy you aren’t for me anyway.
What most foxes and wolves consider to be “effort” is staring directly at someone. That’s not effort in my opinion. I stare at people all the time doesn’t mean I want them. Furthermore, the difference between men and women in my experience is if they catch you staring, most women will at least SMILE. I love that shit! Guys will stare back with this vacant look on their faces.
You’re right sir. I am riding the bench right now for a few reasons but trust if I see something I have to have, I’m going for it…top, bottom, verse, male, female. Doesn’t matter how long it takes.
This is REAL TALK!!!
the thing is additionally not every eye fuck is from a guy whos available to you..lots of men in relationships get their kicks eye fucking and not acting on it..because they just want to feel the heat of flirting and getting some attention back..not that he will act on it
I want you to touch more on this styles…
when a fox asks me to touch something i cant help but oblige 😉
Lol oh my bad you’re absolutely right. I forgot that [translation] “Lots of men are not only lazy but also trifling. As hell.”
[signals waiter] “..check please.”
^THIS.
And not straight up come and speak but show some kind of interest. And follow through on it once its returned.
smh “jeggings” .yes can we talk about that for a sec? Why is it that the fem/inbtw guys are getting dudes at them like its nothing? Do I have to walk around lookin obvious for guys to pay attn? Are they speaking to them because its not as much work figuring out their orientation? Help a fox with a lot going, out please. Seems only the crazies and hood fair are bold enough to ever speak.
I assume you’re black right? So I’m sure you know how bad approaching a dude you’re not sure gets down can go. There aren’t a lot of straight black men who will just let that ride. They feel you’re being disrespectful by even approaching them in a way that seems like you’re being too friendly. Not too many dudes are comfortable enough in their manhood to say “I’m flattered, but I don’t roll that way.”.
Shit, I don’t knock dudes that just go after the ones they can clock 5 miles away. They don’t have to play the staring game or beat around the bush.
Yes I am black but even the “eye fuck”; It doesn’t guarantee anything. There have been plenty of times I’ve caught eyes with a dude and nothing has happened. I assume because I’m not the low V neck wearing type to come up after a few mutual glances and say “Ha’youdoin”? Niggas are lazy these days. Period. If you don’t initiate it, its not gonna happen.
PRIME example; a guy that catches the train at the same stop as i has been eyeing me like a glass of ice water in the 3rd level of hell FOR AT LEAST TWO WEEKS. At first I wouldn’t pay him much attn. Half bc nobody likes a thirst fox ad half bc I had to get pass the though of him possibly not having a car lol well today I actually returned his stares. Straight up held my stare and even smirked as he looked back and fourth a couple times aaaaaaand.. NOTHING. Not until I find some reason to speak to him will he find the balls to make something happen.
No time for the faint of heart so I wont be wasting my tenergy.
it was me.
i see way to many ugly and queeny guys pullin the finest meat these days.
it was me needing to get in the game and find a way to maneuver.
i am not anything like them so i should be sitting in vip all like now.
but i won’t lie and say my site isn’t helping me, and everyone, find what they are looking for tho.
Hi Jamari =)
Theres need to be a manual for the gays..if u hit the gym and work for that body…keep it a a little under wraps…theres no way to hide it we can see from the silhouette thats in there..and when we get home u can stay butt booty naked the whole time if u like..but u have to leave a lil mystery in public..give a regular v and a jean that hangs on the ass just right but doesnt look like a legging and im happy
Lmao I’ve noticed (no offense) gay guys can be a lil tacky. I think we (they) lack that ability to look in the mirror and say “does this look crazy?” And speaking of leggings you should see the bottom half of that outfit. I’d link to the facebook album but that would be against “the code” 🙂 (also a manual that should be mass emailed to every gay with no common sense)
i agree…i think the manual should be..if u want to be percieved as ABC..then wear blah blah blah..because the same dude in the plunging to the navel sweater and the jeggings is getting holla-ed at by some of the hardest straightest looking dudes
OH AND I FORGOT ONE TOPIC OF CONVERSATION ON THE DATE!!!…why were u so secretive online? .i.e. “no pics and really private” when you obviously walk around OUT and PROUD..
That happened a lot when I used to do the online thing. Private photos, acting like secret agent man but actually uber butch QUEEN and could be seen at every club you can name; “Have you looked in the mirror? You practically wear your sexuality (like this deep V) for everyone to see. No need for the fraudulent DL status.”
welcome foxandthecity!
These are definitely not the responses i was expecting.
I think hes really pretty. But hes too “fem”? That’s what fem looks like to some people? Judging by the picture, i would bet his mannerisms are actually a lot more on the masculine side of things.
I take back what he said. His brows looked a little feminine but I couldn’t get a good look at the pic from my phone.
I think people are kind of throwed off by him smiling though. He’s cute to me. He looks like he’ll want to take care of you. Lol
He can get it.
Idk If there’s a ‘look’ for fem, but his appearance – especially that low-cut ‘blouse’ – gives me pause. It’s too much for me. I don’t like drawing that much attention to myself when I’m out on a date. Could he get it? Probably, but that’s very likely all it’d be…
like all of the faceless wolves i would talk to him. but i do agree with wolfstyle and get him a normal v-neck
He could sound like RuPaul or Vin Diesel, it’s all good. I like the way he looks; hope he has some intelligence to back it up.
Im conflicted. Lol!
That shirt and those eyebrows are a no go, but he looks like he is either the stuck up type or the really nice, nurturing type which I like.
Id hang with him but I wouldnt go to anywhere where Id run into someone I know until he gets a shorter vneck and grows those eyebrows out. lol
Way too glam/lady like for my taste. This post must be for the wolves haha um I would assume he was more on the popular side and being that I go forvery low-key types; I’d ask him where the nearest starbucks is and keep it moving.
these damn entries make me feel so damn superficial…and well I guess I am 🙂 I wouldn’t be feeling this guy. The shirt. The brows. I’m just not into fem guys. I wouldn’t be surprised if he bought those pecs from dr 90210. It’s just the way he chooses to show them,,,like women with breast implants,,,theyre so accostume to living with out boobies, they can’t help but to dress trashy upon first purchasing them…Looks like his shirt n hairline is in a competition to see who can plunge the furthest.ha…Would he be feeling me? Whos to say. Apparently the only men attracted to me are middle aged white men. Atleast those are the ones who follow me around the gym locker room like stray dogs 🙁 speaking of which…thats why I couldn’t kick it with dude up above…were at the gym working out together…one of these white men crosses the line in the locker room…im ready to fight…this nicca aint got my back cuzz he dnt wanna rip his blouse…naw I’ll pass.lol
No offense to anyone. Dude haas beautiful skin and is prolly the nicest guy ever…i dunno…i blame jamari for my catty response 🙂
All depends on what he sounded like & his mannerisms. His body looks fairly sick, so it could be a smash & go at least…but if he was too ‘cunty’ all bets are off. Though I’d still probably grab the booty on the sly.
He could NOT wear that shirt though – this is not Fame, Leroy…
he would be definitely feeling me..but i would maybe spill something on him by “mistake and then take him to a store and i would buy him a normal T shirt..and then continue the date
lolol…