so i’ve learned to heal from many years of abuse,
more-so mental and emotional,
i also learned something as well.
one of the many things ive noticed with abuse is…

Continue reading “you need the abuse to prove they love you” →

remember the scene in kill bill,
probably in the beginning,
where bride is getting punched around by the other assassins?
they all turned on her for bill,
hence the name “kill bill”.
the whole movie was about her having to show up again.

She had to show tf up so she could take them all down,
one by one.

she had to learn to get her fight back.
kill bill is one of my favorite movies.
it came out in 2003 when i was a “bride”.
i thought that year was going to break me tbh.
its interesting how 2023 has mirrored 2003 in many ways.
many of us seem to have the same opinion about this year…

Continue reading “showin’ tf (back) up” →

i don’t care what anyone tells or fonts me.
i don’t care if you try to act like it doesn’t.

Nothing feels better than watching someone who hurt you get exposed.

nothing hits better than watching them crumble.
nothing makes you cum harder than getting your retribution.
orgasms last a good couple seconds; getting vindicated lasts a lifetime.
i’m not here to font you not to celebrate in someone’s demise…

Continue reading “nothing will bring you more joy than when your enemies are exposed” →

Yesterday has been on one.
Actually it has been one,
two,
and three but I ended up getting a message at the end.

so my phone has been acting weird.
we know when something is off when we choose not to ignore it.
message one?
anyway,
the actions were off and some things weren’t functioning well.
randomly the other day,
i came upon an article about doing a clean install of the entire software.
that means resetting the entire phone and setting it up like it’s brand new.
i ended up calling apple and after a few diagnostic tests,
they told me the clean install will fix the issue.
something inside was urging me to start over with a clean slate.
message two?

yesterday during the afternoon,
i decided to do it.
after that whole process,
my phone started acting much faster and better but Foxhole…

Continue reading “erase all contents and settings” →

life can be pretty interesting when we make it that way.
i’m learning that when we think and feel differently,
we can create magic within our lives.
yesterday,
i was feeling pretty good.
i have been feeling pretty good these last two weeks tbh.
i said to myself:

“I am wanted.
I am desired.
I am getting apologies from people who hurt me.
I am safe.”

i want to start speaking to myself differently.
i kid you not that shortly after i said that…

Continue reading “past rewind so i press fast forward (or eject the tape completely)” →

for my foxholers who been in toxic and abusive relationships,
i got a question for ya’ll:

When did you know you were done?

i can imagine it was a feeling,
right?
like,
something inside just snapped and you felt the feeling of being fed up.
that jackal you thought you loved just didn’t feel the same anymore.
its that feeling of…

Continue reading “that feeling inside that turns you off” →