Majorca

i dyed my hair black, yell “aye papi!” during sex, and will be spanish from now on

there was a vixen i knew that fooled TF outta me back in the day.
she had introduced herself to me as “puerto rican“.
she had jet black hair,
always rocked hoop earrings,
spoke in a ghetto spanish accent,
and had a collection of black dick from her hood.
it wasn’t until a mutual friend outed her one day:

“You know she white,
right?”

it shocked TF outta me tbh.
i shoulda known because she hid her parents until i saw a picture.
a foxholer sent me a story about alec balwin’s wife,
“hilaria” baldwin.
allegedly,
she liked spain so much that she decided to be born there.
it all started with this 2013 footage from a david letterman episode that alec was on.
he was talking about his wife’s heritage:

If “the first thing” Hilaria Baldwin told Alec Baldwin is that she’s from Boston, then this is really too cringe ???????? pic.twitter.com/U21rJCsMxY

— potato gay (@brennylen) December 28, 2020