Working Out Means You Signed Your Life Over To The Devil?

tumblr_ms1n5frNMi1qjl96uo1_500“do 1,000 sit ups before breakfast.
2,000 before lunch,
and 10,000 before bedtime.”

“see these rock hard abs?
they came from doing sits on the holy grail and drinking cat blood right after.”

“you can get bouncing pecs too.
just make sure you lift your weight in a mini cooper and then wrestle a rabid raccoon right after.”

“i’m a herbalife life assistant. contact me today.”

is herbalife the male mary kay?
yeah so those are all instagram statuses.
you know i keed.
first it was models,
then it was twerking,
now its the BILF (body i’d like to f).

tumblr_ms0o8lpDVR1qfyyoco1_500now we’re talking!
personal trainer wolves have started to flood instagram.
you can’t page hop without seeing compression shorts,
work out videos in the playground,
and sweat juice pecs.
listen i love my wolves with the muscular bodies.
i been known to worship a nice body,
while on my knees with spanish candles burning,
but has anyone noticed that everyone with muscle mass wants to whey in on a workout regiment?
it seems like these wolves who sucked as athletes have decided that training would be their life goal.
how fun is some meaty asshole
telling you that you ain’t shit because you don’t live in the gym?
how fun also that they won’t date anyone who isn’t working out either?
its like they have the personality of a dumbbell.
you notice a majority of these wolves have no one?
how can they have anyone really?
well besides “gymella” and that bitch is pretty much ran through.
hell the illusion of great work out like sex maybe just a fantasy as well.
i don’t mind the free work out tips,
but god forbid i try to hit them up about advice.
hell even personal training sessions…
tumblr_lsbmt6NdyQ1qhtn3ko1_r1_500 tumblr_lsbmt6NdyQ1qhtn3ko2_500i mean you are a “personal trainer” right?
i’m starting to think that personal training is all some of them have to offer.

with a gym now on every corner,
and a “steve to stephon” type dude with an instagram account,
i couldn’t help but wonder…

has personal training
become the new fall back career for swaggless men?

F-BI: The Houston Allstar Party Foxhole Conglomerate Edition

nba allstar weekend is next week.
houston is where the party is at.
allstar time when if you are skilled enough,
you can get a baller wolf of all kinds to do whatever.
i like to work in one on one environments personally.
they can’t tell classy from who will suck dick on a hand stand at big events.
it still doesn’t mean you can’t go and have some fun!
bring back some “who fucked who?” and other ratchet inside scoop.
sexy vixens will be magnets that weekend.

i got an email from an insider f-bi who wanted to hip the other f-bi to all the events happening….

Continue reading “F-BI: The Houston Allstar Party Foxhole Conglomerate Edition”

How To Get An Baller By Being Cassie or Lauren London

It was real easy for these 2 scammers…

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How To Blow NFL Players… and Not Get Paid Doing It

Looks like he wants to FUCK them all in the ass…
… and not in the good way…

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Bagged A Fox; By A Fox


Thank you for tuning in.
I appreciate your love and support.
I really do.

Don’t think YOU are off the hook.
Jamari has a few rules for you.
Here are a few things YOU need to follow when baggin’ a Fox of any kind…

Continue reading “Bagged A Fox; By A Fox”

Miami Ho Bowl

Right now Foxes,
at this very moment,
some groupie bitch is getting some HARD PIPE and tryna get pregnant in Miami.

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