inside jamari fox

Have I mentioned how much boys amuse me?

All these silly games that need to come to and end. If boys stopped playing games, more bottoms would be getting fucked. Maybe that’s the problem. They are just that: boys.

Am I right?

So, Mr. Attitude at work is very funny. One minute he is speaking to me and saying “hello” or “good morning”, staring at me as he walks by…. and the next minute he is giving me the silent treatment. Basically waiting for me to come to him. I’m no one’s dog. There will be no “come Jamari come/good boy” bullshit over here.

I figured since he doesn’t know me, I will re-introduce myself.

I play the art of Hot ‘N’ Cold pretty well. Hot ‘N’ Cold is when you give and then suddenly pull away… then when they are wanting more, you give and then repeat the pulling away. The same game he plays; I invented. So, when he started playing, I stopped. When I started, then he stops. It is all one big back and forth mess.

I know he is interested because he is…. Something. I cannot put my finger on it. Something connects us to each other and I think it has a lot to do with we are one in the same.

Like does attract like.

I find it even more hilarious that when I said I was going to stop focusing on dudes, they all of a sudden want to show interest. I’ll talk about Mr. Personal Trainer in a later blog.

Life is amusing, aint it?

Is looking for men over rated?

I had to ask myself that question, watching yet another movie dealing with love. If I’m not seeing it, then I’m hearing it through my speakers. If that’s not it, then I’m hearing about it from friends and loved ones.

Men, men, men + love (or ones idea of bad love desicions) and wild sex mixed in.

It’s almost becoming sickening especially when you aren’t involved with anyone at the moment. Yup, Jamari is actually cruising on Drought Street. I have been on a couple dates this year and none of the potential “men” were worth a call back. It was like was dating bottom of the barrel and I am far from it. They, of course, loved me but alas – I was over it mid date.

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I was a female. Had my share of men I was attracted too. They have it so easy and they should. Boy sees girl and tries to hit on girl. Boy sees me and can’t tell if I’m gay so he moves on. It seems the type of man that I am attracted too comes in a “straight” Godiva wrapper. It leaves for a lot of lonely nights and even longer days.

Searching for a Devin, Dez, Trey, or whoever makes me hard is like looking for a needle in a haystack. Let’s face it, I may never get my Devin Thomas. Or, I may get him and he be a limp dick slut bag with STDs hiding under the flap of his dick. I kinda grew into looking past femininity. Ones person’s fem maybe one man’s dream lover. Let’s face it: we are gay and even the most masculine man has a tinge of bitch in em. Ask a female!

But I am kinda over the chat sites, DL sign language, and all that bs that comes with this lifestyle.

I kind of want to concentrate on my journey to the top. I can damn near buy what I want (I’m no Steve Jobs but I do pretty well for myself)…… so money is not really an option. What I don’t have in men, I make up for in Ben Franklin. I am focused on school and my career. I have a nice place to live and I try to make sure my wardrobe is poppin’….

But I get lonely and I am starting to see so do a lot of gay men. Its either a lot of sex or a lot of loneliness. Even these negros who are in relationships are lonely. Its bullshit. Maybe if I was a wreckless whore, I would be happy… But I’m not. Thank GOD for parents who raised me right. Plus I know wreckless whores and their walls are damn near hanging down to their kneecaps (I kid, I kid). But guess what, whores of all shapes and forms get lonely too.

So is Jamari Fox over? HELL NO. I have just begun. I just think I need to focus on me and what is important (pretty much me) for right now.

So all in all, I want you to join me. I want us, you and me, to find what we are looking for and maybe find a potential man along the way. But if he doesn’t show face – we will still be okay.

Not jaded but optimistic. This is the first step in recovery.

Let’s get it.

Brought To You By The Foxberry

You ever had someone that you were secretly attracted too,
give you way too much attitude and it turned you the FUCK on?

Well my latest appetizer on the menu is doing that to me…
and he doesn’t know what he is in for when I get my way.

Continue reading “F@#k His Attitude” →

All this cheating I been doing with Dez has made him jealous.

Continue reading “Devin Cums From The Left….” →

How I would have liked him to….

*bites lip*

Continue reading “I Want More…” →

Well Married Guy just left my crib and….. *sigh*….

Ok so this is how it all started.

I was laying in my bed and watching a movie alone. I was simply just enjoying my alone time until I started getting bored and wanted some company.

Turned on the chat site to see what was biting but it seemed like all the fish swam to another part of the ocean. So after chatting with the world’s most boring nigga, I get a text from Married Guy asking if I was free and he wanted to meet me. I was in the mood to meet up but not to have sex. Well that is, unless some fine ass muthafucka showed up. He would have def rocked my world tonight. But, I settled to meet Married Guy.

So, since I never met Married Guy, I figured tonight was the perfect night. I got dressed and met him at the train. He was cute in person but he was kinda…. Doofy. He was kinda fragile looking with clothes on. He was taller than me but his style was all the way wack. I don’t know what boots those were but he should never wear then again. Plus, I smelled something that didn’t smell to fresh.

I brought him back to the spot and we talked. I kept on smelling this nasty smelling item that was part of his outfit. When he got closer to me, that is when it hit me like a lightning rod.

HIS BREATH WAS OUT OF ORDER!

I did everything I could to pay attention to what he was saying but block out that mouth venom. I put a pillow to my face, put my finger under my nose, and even my whole hand in attempts to block it all away.

So quick thinking, I asked if he wanted a massage. He took off his clothes to reveal the nicest toned body… But his breath was still the main focus of why I was turned off. So I gave him a muthafucka of a massage (my world famous massages actually) and he was in heaven.

He decided to return the favor, all while tryna sneak feels on my ass. Married Guy was horny and he was horny for this Fox. He told me I have a nice fat ass and if he could massage my cheeks.

Yeah not happening.

So I told him I had to wake up early and he had to go.

He put his clothes on and I lead him to the door. He proceeded to hug me and feel up on my ass. I couldn’t smell his throat disease so I just stood at my door hugging him. I always enjoyed it. He kept saying all the right things to get the boi puss. He was moving his hips up and down – which meant “Ima play this for a while so he will give in and give me the ass”. He kept whispering in my ear about all the sexual shit we sexted about. He felt my dick and I was hard as hell.

I may have slipped…. Until he turned to face me and I breathed in some of that breath shit and it damn near dazed me out his arms.

That was the final blow that made him have to go.

I couldn’t let him lay ontop of me with his breath smelling the way it did. I woulda been fucked into a coma from bad breath.

So yeah, no sex for Married Guy and I doubt ever. And I am okay with that LOL

Later Foxes

Brought To You By The Foxberry