find yourself

Being On The Bottom Is Hard

don’t i know it?
life seems to always provide me with the lessons i need to get by…
i don’t know if you know,
but finding yourself can be one of your greatest accomplishments.
being able to look in the mirror and say:

THIS IS WHO I AM

…feels oh so good.
with great rewards of emotional and spiritual growth,
also comes the realization that you have a ton dead weight around you.
some of which have already gotten rid of you out their life.
this is where i’m at right now in my life.
although i’m happy i’m not apart of the mixxy ny scene,
having to be everywhere just so i could be seen,
i have actually lost alot of those same people within the last year or two.
i can honestly say that i am on the bottom right now socially.
you learn a lot when you stop reaching out to people.
not being able to attend all the fly events.
the popular kids who think instagram likes equal self esteem.
you slowly realize that world is all about users and abusers.
ones who determine your worth by how much money/connects you have.
no one truly is your friend unless you grew up with.
even still…