i’m not my voice

i’ve said it before but i hated my voice growing up.
along with hating my voice,
i hated my whole being as well.
i was always being picked on for something,
either at home or at school.
i highlighted and enhanced everything i thought was wrong with me.
i wasn’t like the other boys

Played sports
Playing “20 minutes of heaven inside her coochie”
Fathers being proud of them

i had a high voice,
had feminine mannerisms,
many would consider “soft”,
and my father was slowly evolving into the bitter betty pokemon.
i did love track and field and could run like black beauty.
in an “a-ha” moment today,
i realized something about all the things i “hated” about myself.
all of those things i thought were “wrong” with me…

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