When Bad Christians Happen To The New Straights

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oh andrew caldwell has messed up today.
he has lost his way.
i think he needs to be found...
and quick.
so an f-bi alerted me on mister “i love the wimmenz” and his latest tirade.
he has become a “new straight” ya’ll.
what is that you ask?
well take a look…

 oh what has he done lordt?
what has he done?…

new straight (n) = someone who gets delivert,
but suddenly becomes brand new and starts bashing gays

the new straights are actually worse than the homophobes.
the homophobes are ignorant until you find that button.
the button that is located somewhere in their ass.
the new straights launch hate to prove how straight they are.
proving it to people who probably don’t believe it anyway.
…but i get it andy.
i do.
you been turnt out by the lord!
it happens to the best of us.
god has molded that ball of powdered sugar into the rock of gibraltar.
yet…
you still look like you suck more dicks than i do.

…and still doing it.
allegedly.
kissy faces andy?
seriously?
that came in your “new straight” starter pack?

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either he is trolling for attention or he really has lost his mind.
its a shame that he will be destroyed tho.
we will destroy him.
one GPS to a sex tape or a secret jack’d account and we will press “go”.
there is someone waiting patiently to expose him now.
i hope mister “i love wimmenz” realizes he set those balls in motion.
it won’t be easy tho.
trying to erase all the sexy d/l wolves he will be meeting with his 15 minutes.
his fantasies.
the ones who still make his little dick hard.
you can’t erase that feeling.
god can’t change the feeling when a wolf’s tongue slides across your hole.
the way you arch your back when slaps you on your ass.
the way his pipe massages your walls and milking your prostate.
you remember how this felt andy…

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…so yeah andy.
that is going to feel like a slow torture until you can’t take it anymore.
and when you do,
because we all know you will…
you better hope that person is not a member of the foxhole.
enjoy!

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lowkey: what the hell…
he is a public figure now?
i’m sensing some heavy attentionisto like behavior from this one…

screen grabs / pictures = facebook

10 thoughts on “When Bad Christians Happen To The New Straights

  1. Am I the only one who realizes this dude is suffering from some serious mental health issues and we all know what church folk say about that.

    Mental illness is real and he’s a perfect example of it; this weak-minded sissy needs to see a therapist quickly.

  2. Let be honest, guys. It pretty obvious on why he’s trying to make himself straight. Let me ask you this, if you didn’t know him or know of him and you saw him the streets or wateva. Would you hit him up or put a pass? I mean I already the answers, but Im just saying. It like a black woman who tries to find a black man, but none want her so she starts dating outside her race.

      1. D/L wolves? Hmmm maybe, but I kinda doubt it because wouldn’t they prefer a guy who keep their secrets? Something about him tells me he has loose lips.

  3. This dude. I can’t man. I do not believe that he is straight one bit.

    That first pic tho. Looking like a six month pregnant woman in a maternity dress.

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