*the part where i flipped my whole scalp over some nonsense today

You hit me,
tell me about your toxic relationship,
I give you advice,
you do the opposite.

You announce you are breaking up & moving out,
i support the decision,
you go back home in the course of 1 day.

You tell me you’re cheating,
I’m over it so i agree,
I say you’re back to your old ways,
you tell me i need to go get dick and stop trying to plan your life.

what?

YOU COME TO ME WITH YOUR FUCKIN’ RELATIONSHIP ISSUES!
as a friend,
i try to be there.
you don’t want to leave so you’d rather cheat.
cool,
but don’t insult me in the process.

I’m tired of being mister dependable to certain people.
I am the type who will be a shoulder to cry on,
but somehow,
I get the bullshit thrown back in my face later on.

I show people kindness and they treat me like shit.
I don’t answer my phone and I’m being antisocial.
I give advice and it’s not taken seriously.
I see the good in people and they show me the truth.
I go into things as “me” and people don’t appreciate that.
I show compassion and then i don’t get empathy.

I’m so fuckin’ over it.
I don’t know what people want from me anymore.
You try to be friends to some of these assholes and they repay you in filth,
yet you treat them like shit and they want to be your best friend in the entire world.

I’m tied.
I iz tied.
i’m so fuckin tied.
this new season of my life is on some “fuck people/do me” shit.
it’s like 98% of the world doesn’t no one knows how to be a decent human being to those who treat them well,
but will roll out the red carpet and cater to a fuckin’ asshole.

 

When you dip up off them,
they wanna blow up your phone/text/email asking you to come back.
Nah homie,
I wasn’t treated good so I dipped.
Ask your asshole to fill that void.

i needed that vent.
whew.

Author: jamari fox

the fox invited to the blogging table.

9 thoughts on “*the part where i flipped my whole scalp over some nonsense today

  1. I have a friend of mine who’s a serial dater that thinks foreign black Men are better quality.. She was married for 15+ years, then divorced due to his multiple infidelities. Had 3 children with her ex, they’re now ages 20, 16 and 6. Three daughters. Then she met this sexy ass Haitian, ended up pregnant. She had her first son who is 2 now. They co parent but she’s been in two relationships since ,with another Haitian guy and now a Jamaican. She moves guys in fast and then get upset when it gets rocky. So her current relationship they went to his home in Jamaica and stayed almost a month around Christmas. She posts pics of their relationship like she’s happy but constantly calling me to complain about how she’s tired of his shit. I told her she needs to spend time alone and that ever since Her divorce she hasn’t had time to heal. Then I see an indirect post on FB about people not wanting to see friends happy. So I gave it God. We talk still however when she mentions Him I shut it down and say Stop talking shit about Him if you know you’re not leaving.

  2. Cosign EVERYTHING!!!!!Jamari I go through the same EXACT things with people. I know there are genuine people out there who truly value friendship’s but it’s hard as hell to find them!

    1. Say it again! 🗣🗣🗣

      Real ralk, a lot of gay men (myself included) go through this. This reeks of a one-sided unhealthy at best (but usually toxic) friendship. Ask yourself, Jamari, “what I am getting out of this friendship? ”

      What attracts you to them? What binds/ tethers you to them?

      And, is this a recurring theme in other friendships. I know it was for me. And, I know I wasn’t at my best when we interacted often.

  3. Hi J👋! You’re really feeling that Cancer/Virgo energy today huh? I feel you brother. I’m right there with you. We’re good people, and unfortunately we tend to attract bad people (read users).

    My Virgo/Sagittarius energy is not afraid to fuck shit up one in a while. People know they can count on me when they need me but at the same time I’m not afraid to give them that fire energy too! Gotta find the right balance, which we struggle with most of the time.

    1. ^CANCER/VIRGO ENERGY REALLLLL HEAVY!!!

      was it that damn eclipse?
      i feel like it turned my whole shit upside down.
      i really hate that all cancers seem to experience this.
      every single cancer seems to attract some real assholes into our lives.

      my only fire is in my venus.
      i think when i’m fed up,
      i can conjure up some fire energy somewhere in my chart.
      my big 3 is water,
      earth,
      and air.
      i def feel it all,
      but i think the virgo in me is always analyzing my emotions smh.

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