The Curious Case Of The Incredible Vanishing Negro

oktextding ding ding.
oh looksie looksie,
it’s a new text.
i wonder from who?
momma asking you to pick up collard greens for dinner?
sibling asking did you dvr over their witches of waverly?
nope.
it’s some number you don’t know.
judging from the “wassup”,
they know you.
who they tho?
so you pretend to remember who it is.
(i hit random numbers with a smooth “who the hell is this?”)
after a few conversations,
it’s “him”.
that “guy”.
that guy you met damn near 6 months ago.
you took his number out your phone because he vanished.
he never followed through to say “you weren’t what i was looking for”.
now he is back?
say what?
don’t you hate that shit?

this scenario reminds me of one of my favorite jay lines:

“i was just fuckin’ dem girls.
i was gon’ get right back…”

aww really?
how romantic!
no.
not really muthafucka.
i hate “blasts from the pasts” as i like to call them.
i’ve had a ton of them these last few months.
once i hit them with that curve,
they always “damn its like that” and “why you so rude??”.

tumblr_mgq93cTC151ql5yr7o1_r1_250 tumblr_mgq93cTC151ql5yr7o2_250…that’s why.
these are dudes who had you in a rotation,
you lost,
so they never replied back to your last text or call.
they probably had someone and was looking for some side booty/peen,
or you were one of like 9 people they were talking too.
lord knows who was actually getting the pipe/booty.
maybe it was you?
you were the one he picked?
if so,
congrats!

tumblr_mhjx2wQqt21rk42oyo1_500so why hit you up now?
boredom?
break up?
remembered you and wanted to get at you again?

whatever the reason is,
unless you are realllllllllllllllllllly interested,
you can give it another shot.
i don’t like being on the back burner for anyone.
i’m always the first round draft pick.
these lames don’t have shit on me,
and if a wolf fails to realize that,
he won’t even be privileged to get a sample of what i have to offer.

slam+doori started to wonder about the wonder that is the “blasts from the past”.
in this dating world,
no matter who you are or what you like,
you will always be defined in two ways:

1)someone people fuck.
2) someone people take seriously.

“blasts from the pasts” already picked up on it from the initial convo.
he can tell if he you are someone who maybe worth it,
or he is setting up a time so he knock that out.
i hate when nothing happens and they vanish.
they hit you up out the blue months later,
when you damn near forgot about them,
after leaving you in limbo and question marks.
got you wondering if something is wrong with you?
did you fuck it up?
wtf?
isn’t that bad etiquette?
were you not bending over backwards enough?
is it this “thrist” thing that seems to be fashion these days?

glass-of-waterit seems you get the person the more you show how dehydrated you are.
my thing is,
what happens if he is fine as hell,
exactly your type,
and you did actually like him?
i had to ask…

Would you give a blast from the past a second chance?

4 thoughts on “The Curious Case Of The Incredible Vanishing Negro

  1. Maybe in the past I would have, but now not at all..

    I know the game now. Even if dude knows you’re the truth he has to keep his options open just in case something better comes along. He’s scared he’s going to miss out on something better.

    If he’s really fine and my type there a small chance I’ll give him a second chance, but he’ll be at the bottom of the totem pole and trust he’s going to have to compete with several others for my attention.

  2. “i hate when nothing happens and they vanish.
    they hit you up out the blue months later,
    when you damn near forgot about them,
    after leaving you in limbo and question marks.
    got you wondering if something is wrong with you?
    did you fuck it up?
    wtf?
    isn’t that bad etiquette?”

    THIS part right here, smh. You hit it right on the head, Jamari.

    1. ^if dudes weren’t such dumbasses and stood to be a little honest,
      people wouldn’t feel lead on and hurt by another’s actions.
      bet if you did it to them,
      they would be calling you everything but a child of god.

  3. i am guilty of having a number and not using it for eons. if i hit u up. the REASONs r IS

    1. boredom
    2 cant remember why i dint follow up and why the hell i have ur number
    3, Boredom
    4. u dint strike me like someone who anything is worth from but u do got a PHAT ASS tho

    If we had a rapport prior then
    1. Boredom
    2. U probably have something I need that I left in your house
    3.U r probably going to be useful soon

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