life sucks and that’s okay

i heard a quote the other day that really stuck with me.
for some,
it might be negative,
but i will bring it around to something positive.
i promise.
so the quote went:

“Life is suffering.”

the origin of said quote is unknown,
but from research,
it may or may not have come from buddha.
life might have it’s moments of suckage,
but that suffering is actually good for you.
when i look back at my own suffering…

If i didn’t suffer from a bad date,
I wouldn’t have made the foxhole

If my parents didn’t die,
and experienced all the hurt that I did afterwards,
I wouldn’t have made it this far

If I didn’t know what it was like to be broke,
I wouldn’t have learned why having money saved was so important

If I didn’t have that HIV scare years ago,
I wouldn’t have known what being careful was

i could go on and on,
but you get the point.
as of late:

when i walk the streets or on the train,
i see so many fine wolves.
when you’re gay,
you can often feel very invisible in these big forests.

I feel so invisible

always have,
tbh.
the wolves i’m really attracted to are probably very straight.
unless you’re out on the scene,
which i never enjoyed,
it’s very hard to meet someone you might actually like in your day to day.

on the flip side tho…

there is a fox who meets wolves wherever he goes.
from regular to the rich af,
it’s never a problem for him.
he walks in the room and good dick is literally drawn to him.
i’ve often wondered…

What do I need to have that kind of sauce?

so i’m suffering in one way,
but often times,
the other fox is in another.
sure,
he might be meeting and sleeping with them…

…But are they sticking around?

gay life doesn’t always mean you meet someone good after one date.
hell,
is there even “a date”?
good dick/ass is a dime a dozen in these forests these days.
so his suffering might be different,
but it’s all the same.

at the end of the day,
we all have that “something” that makes us suffer.
the real shit is life isn’t meant to be perfect.
we all suffer in some way so we can strive for better.
some are comfortable where they are,
while others want to literally touch the stars.
the higher you want to go; the more suffering comes with it.
most of our heroes and idols suffered to get where they are.
i don’t know what your suffering is,
but learn to embrace it.

It’s what making you “you”.